


Not Entirely Normal

by Littleshimmerofhope



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Also warning: Wonwoo might sometimes come off as an ass, Angst and Porn, Friends With Benefits, He's oblivious to Mingyu's feelings, M/M, Mingyu is in love with Wonwoo, Pining, Possibly Unrequited Love, What are you waiting for? go gO GO!, Who knows??, just read it already, lmao love that tag though, meanie, meanie couple, smut cures cancer btw
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-27
Updated: 2017-02-16
Packaged: 2018-09-02 14:46:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 61,216
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8671570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Littleshimmerofhope/pseuds/Littleshimmerofhope
Summary: Wonwoo’s grin widened.“Yeah, you did. You really do know me the best.”They were back to acting like normal, and Mingyu told himself he should be feeling relieved. But he wasn’t. Instead, he felt as if a knife was slowy cuting into his heart, and a huge lump was starting to take shape in his throat as they returned to being friends.✧ ✧ ✧In which Mingyu keeps telling himself that he is not in love with Jeon Wonwoo, while the object of his affliction and affection keeps leading him on in a seemingly endless spiral of "mutually benefitial" shared moments that doesn't have an experation date, even though for the sake of Mingyu's heart it probably should.It's hard to struggle with a so-called "friendship" that is not entirely normal.





	1. You taught me how to breathe, now I can't breathe without you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before the story begins, I'd like to establish that this will be a multichaptered fic. (Hooray!) And while I can't promise great commitment, I have a ton of free time atm and I promise to have fun with the idea. Comments, reviews, critique is highly welcomed (although the latter less so unless it is phrased constructively.)
> 
> Disclaimer: This story is also highly influenced by a Shonen ai(?)/Yaoi manga by the name of Blood Sugar Sex Magic, and there will be great similarities as some situations are directly inspired by the characters and the book. I found the story sweet, and had fun adapting it into a fanfiction revolving around my OTP in Seventeen. (Although, don't let the meanie fool you, half the time I am WonHui trash—) Despite writing this I want to clarify that this fanfiction does not completely follow the storyline of the book as it is it's own adaption. Therefore the situations, story development and characters will not be the same as the manga.
> 
> Also, warning, as this contains mature content (smut, w/e you want to call it, it's Rated M either way) Two boys getting it on, as well as emotional abuse (That would be me as an author abusing you as a reader lmao~)
> 
> I would say this is highly OOC for both Mingyu and Wonwoo, but it's all in good spirit. Typically, Wonwoo would be portrayed as the "dark", "subdued", or "emo" character, which I don't think is entirely fair since he is ultimately a sweet and warm person, and Mingyu is usually portrayed as the "bubbly", "bright", and "outgoing" person out of the two, which, also, can be unfair depending on how you chose to look at it – his struggles, hardships and insecurities are also part of him. So for this time around, I chose to switch their usual roles around and made Mingyu the lonewolf and Wonwoo the chatter. (AKA they will appear OOC and there's no need for you to point it out to me since it's deliberate.) 
> 
> Now, I promise that I'm finally done introducing this fic, so without further ado,
> 
> Enjoy~

✧ ✧ ✧

Kim Mingyu stared into the little square of locker 352 (which had been his assigned locker since sophomore year) and judged the contents of the cramped inside. There, inside the small locker, sat one of his white sneakers waiting to be switched out by the black obligatory indoor shoes every student was encouraged to wear during school-hours that were currently dressing Mingyu’s feet. But there appeared to be a problem.

Mingyu had been going home, along with the majority of the student body, and was just passing by his locker to trade the plain loafers for his everyday footwear, but one of his sneakers was allegedly missing.

Someone took his shoe.

Mingyu knew whom.

Calmly, he shut the door of his locker and turned to head back down the corridors of the school.

_Wonwoo._

✧ ✧ ✧

Loud bombosterous laughter bounced between the walls of the mostly vacant classroom.

“Are you serious?”

“It’s not _that_ funny!”

“What are you _saying?_ It’s hilarious!”

“Ow, my stomach hurts!”

“Just… Wow. I don’t know what else there is to say.”

“ _Guys_ , could you _please_ quiet down! You’re drawing an awful lot of attention to us!”

Mingyu slid the door of the classroom open, eyes drifting over the few students scattered throughout the room, huddled around random desks in different groups until he spotted the owners of the familiar voices that he’d picked up from the corridor. He stepped inside and closed the door behind him before he headed towards the laughing quartet in the middle of the room.

One of the friends, Wen Junhui, looked up and caught sight of Mingyu’s approaching figure, his sharp oriental features stretched into a playfull grin as they’d all been in the midst of laughing at something. (Or someone, as it seemed.)

“Oh! Mingyu-ssi! Hello~!”

Following his greeting, the second person of the trio, Kwon Soonyoung, raised his face from his arms where he’d been attempting to hide the pink hue of his cheeks from sight and looked at Mingyu with pleading eyes.

“Mingyu-ya, please help me…” He whined pitifully.

Mingyu had no idea what he was so distressed over and his eyes slid to the gaze of the most collected one out of the four, Lee Jihoon, who simply gave him a tired look and a lazy nod in greeting. Mingyu’s gaze kept going until it landed on the back of the fourth and final person in the group whom he’d come for, and he came to a stop behind mentioned male’s chair.

Jeon Wonwoo tilted his head back and looked at Mingyu upside down, greeting him with a huge grin.

“Oh, Mingyu! Listen to this!”

“No…!" Soonyoung’s groan went ignored by of his classmates as Junhui snickered and Wonwoo continued his tale while gesturing to the embarrassed blonde.

“So, for the first time this guy took his girlfriend to a _love hotel_ and did perverted things…”

“So ambitious.” Jihoon commented while inspecting his nails, almost giving off a disinterested vibe, had it not been for the small tweak of his lips that proved he was most certainly amused and in a good enough mood to indulge in his friends’ collective teasing. Junhui burst into a new fit of laughter while Soonyoung’s face burned a darker shade of red.

“ _Please_ stop! Mingyu-ya doesn’t need to hear about this sort of thing…”

“C’mon, surely he’s not _that_ innocent—” Junhui interrupted him through chuckles.

“Somehow, he lost his pants!” Wonwoo declared with vigour.

“That’s _not_ what happened! It was just—” Soonyoung’s explenation was drowned out by the others’ loud laughter.

“I’m going to laugh forever!” Wonwoo and Junhui were both fighting tears.

“So reckless.” Jihoon’s only comment was simple.

“ _Jihonnie~!_ ” Soonyoung whined, feeling abandoned by all of his friends.

“Wonwoo, where’s my shoe?”

“What?”

There was a lull in the noise from the four as all four pairs of eyes turned to look at their guest.

“My shoe.” Mingyu repeated.

Wonwoo tilted his head to the side.

“Isn’t it in your locker?” He looked up at Mingyu with an obliviousness that was very obviously feigned.

Mingyu rolled his eyes. Wonwoo was really bad at this. (Sometimes Mingyu couldn’t believe the guy was one year older than him.)

He sighed and turned to Junhui, Jihoon and Soonyoung instead.

“Do you know?”

“It’s in the teacher’s desk.” Jihoon replied easily.

“He hid it in there.” Junhui gestured towards the front of the classroom and at the desk in question.

“It’s in the top drawer on the left!” Soonyoung supplied helpfully.

“Hey!” Wonwoo gave his friends a scalding look of betrayal whilst Mingyu thanked them and went to retrieve his sneaker.

Wonwoo looked dejected by the turn of events.

“Why did you _tell him?_ ”

Jihoon shrugged.

“Why not?”

“Better question is why do you still insist on messing with him?” Soonyoung looked more chipper now that the conversation had temporarily strayed from his nighttime misadventure.

“ _Traitors_.” Wonwoo hissed at them.

Mingyu walked past them with his sneaker safely back in his posession and headed towards the exit of the classroom with the intention to head home like he had meant to do seven minutes ago without sparing the four male’s another glance. When he reached the door he opened it swiftly, and then shut it with more force than necessary.

Junhui whistled.

“ _Whoops._ He’s mad.”

“Ugh…” Wonwoo groaned and sunk lower in his seat starting to regret pulling his prank as it appeared to be one of Mingyu’s worse days.

Jihoon who was ever so perceptive shot him a glance and nudged Wonwoo’s wrist with his foot underneath the table to draw his attention.

“Does it dampen your mood that much?” He asked gingerly. Wonwoo didn’t respond to him at first, so Jihoon rolled his eyes and continued his mild assault with one of their textbooks, smacking Wonwoo gently over the head with it.

“You reap what you sow, you know.” He reprimanded.

Wonwoo sighed and took the book from Jihoon’s hands, placed it on the table and straightened up in his chair again.

“He keeps leaving without me, what else am I supposed to do?” He half-assedly defended his actions, impressing none of his three companions.

“Well, not being an _ass_ to your dongsaeng is a good start!” Soonyoung piped in, earning himself a stern look from Jihoon for his choice of wording.

“Mingyu is pretty much always in a bad mood.” Junhui mused, playing around on his chair by balancing it on its hind legs. “I wonder if there’s anything that could lighten that guys spirits. Is there anything that he likes?”

“Yeah! Maybe you could cheer him up by doing something he likes!”

“Or maybe just apologise.” Jihoon shrugged his shoulders.

Soonyoung shot him an affronted look.

“No, it’s definitely gotta be something that Mingyu-ya likes!”

“Oh. There are a bunch of things Mingyu likes.”

The other three seemed glad to hear this information from Wonwoo and all brightened up slightly when they saw that his smile had returned.

“Alright. So just do any one of those then.” Junhui made a flippant gesture with his hands, considering this conversation topic resolved.

“And apologise.” Jihoon reminded.

“Yeah, sure.”

“Just — don’t pull any of the stunts you usually do, alright? I don’t think that’ll work for the best. Do you already have something in mind? Something that’ll work and is sure to get him into a better mood?” Soonyoung shot Wonwoo an anxious look, rightfully wary of his friend’s idea of ‘good intentions’.

“Don’t worry about it.”

The corners of Wonwoo’s lips were pulled further up on his face and he gave them all a very mysterious smile.

“… After all, I know a whole lot about the things Mingyu likes.”

✧ ✧ ✧

Mingyu briefly considered turning around and escaping out the back exit of the school building when he caught sight of Wonwoo waiting for him by his locker the next day. The older was leisurely leaning against the metallic structure, head tilted downwards and eyes set on his feet as he played around with a stray pebble probably out of boredom to pass the time while he awaited Mingyu’s appearance. After two seconds of beholding the pitiful sight ahead of him, Mingyu didn’t have the heart to turn around and walk away anymore, so he simply hoisted his bag higher on his shoulder and steeled himself before he approached the boy.

Wonwoo’s expression brightened up considerably when he spotted Mingyu and he immidiatedly straightened up.

“Mingyu!” He stepped aside so that Mingyu could access his shoes and watched him while he switched his loafers for his sneakers.

“Are you still mad about yesterday?” He asked when there was a lack of reply to his greeting and Mingyu shut his locker with a resounding clang.

“No.” He replied tersely. He caught Wonwoo’s narrow-eyed look of doubt and stared back with as much attempted indifference he could muster.

Wonwoo didn’t look very convinced.

“Really?” He asked, inching closer to Mingyu’s face.

Mingyu hurried to turn away.

“ _Really._ ” He replied and Wonwoo hummed before he followed Mingyu out of the building, keeping up with his pace easily.

“You kind of seem it.” He said. “If you’re mad, just tell me.”

Mingyu almost rolled his eyes but settled for sighing instead, forcing his shoulders to relax and trying hard to sound reassuring when he spoke again.

“I’m really not. This week’s just been… draining.”

Wonwoo offered him a warm smile.

“Ah, well, that’s okay. Everyone has bad days. Jihoon kept bugging me to apologise, but since you’re not mad I guess there’s no need for me to do that.”

For some reason, Wonwoo’s words irked Mingyu and he felt slightly irritated with the other’s conclusion.

“What do you want, Wonwoo?” He asked without looking at Wonwoo.

They were walking over the courtyard on the frontside of the school building, headed towards the entrance gate, and if Wonwoo wasn’t there to apologise, then why was he following Mingyu still? Mingyu couldn’t help but think the other was being annoying at the moment.

Wonwoo caught on to his edgy attitude and gave him a unappriciative look.

“What’s with that tone? Is this how you usually speak to your friends?” Mingyu didn’t reply and Wonwoo’s expression soured. “In that case, no wonder you don’t have that many…” He muttered.

Again, Mingyu chose not to reply, but he did shoot Wonwoo a really nasty look that the other responded to by sticking his tongue out towards him. Finding the action really childish, Mingyu rolled his eyes and looked ahead again.

“If you’re following me to insult me, I’d rather have you go away.” He said as cooly as he could.

Wonwoo shook his frown and pouted, feigning being really wounded by Mingyu’s brush-off.

“Aw, don’t say that.” He whined. Then, turning strangely serious, he leant forwards so that he could glance up at Mingyu’s face and capture his gaze, looking at him with unusually open and honest eyes, which made Mingyu believe he was about to voice something really important.

“I like being with you, Mingyu.” He said, and Mingyu could feel the heat unwillingly crawl up his neck to stain his cheeks in a light blush.

He quickly tore his gaze away and hid his reaction from Wonwoo’s eyes, coughing lamely into his hand to rid his throat of the sudden dryness that had taken residence there.

 _God damnit…_ Mingyu wasn’t sure what to think of those words. He chose to believe Wonwoo was teasing him.

“… You still haven’t told me what you want.” He muttered, not allowing himself to be too distracted by Wonwoo and lead them back to topic.

Wonwoo leant back again, a pleasant grin on his face as he leisurely stretched his arms behind his head.

“There are many things in life that I want, Mingyu.” He replied vaugely, looking way too satisfied with himself when Mingyu shot him an unimpressed glance.

“Like bothering me?” He wondered and Wonwoo looked at him with a tilted smile.

“Of course.” His dark eyes gleamed playfully at Mingyu, and their vast darkness was totally encompassing, dragging Mingyu down into their depths. “Bothering you is my number one favourite thing to do.”

Mingyu’s cheeks felt unusually warm again and he looked away from Wonwoo and his eyes and his dark, smooth voice.

“How about you just head home instead?” He suggested and Wonwoo actually laughed at this, throwing his head back momentarily and showcasing the two rows of perfectly white teeth in his mouth as he laughed.

“What? No way. Did you think I was following you just to tease you?”

Mingyu wanted to point out he’d done similar things before and that it really wouldn't surprise him if that was the case, but Wonwoo was looking at him in that way again, with slight amusement but also with something else Mingyu couldn’t quite decipher and really didn’t want to interpret wrongly, so he tore his gaze away and looked forwards instead, trying to impassively shrug his shoulders.

“So why _are_ you following me?” Wonwoo leant closer to him again, so Mingyu had to lean slightly away as to not have his smiling face too close to his.

“Isn’t it obvious? I want to walk you home.”

Mingyu inhaled shakily and held his breath. _This guy._ He almost couldn’t believe him.

“You don’t have to do that.” He said.

“I know, but I want to.” Wonwoo insisted. His smile was contagious and Mingyu pressed his lips together as to not return it, even though hearing Wonwoo say those things made him ridicolously happy.

Mingyu and Wonwoo had been best friends for a little over one year now, ever since Wonwoo had randomly told Mingyu as they passed each other by in the hallway that he found his height appealing in Mingyu’s freshman year.

Wonwoo had struck Mingyu as an odd type during their first meeting, and he hadn’t ever really been able to shake that impression since then, even as they kept bumping into each other by chance and got to know each other better over time. Without understanding how it happened, Mingyu had soon found Wonwoo stuck to his side wherever he went.

They came together without any special involvement on Mingyu’s part. Wonwoo kind of just… made place for himself in Mingyu’s life, and before Mingyu knew it, he’d gotten used to his constant presence and even imagining an everyday without Wonwoo bugging him or being by his side quickly became impossible for his mind.

It wasn’t that they were alike, or similar in any way (They were nothing like that.) but even so, they ended up becoming friends.

Even though it didn’t look like it from an outsider’s point of view, the two of them enjoyed each other’s company and somehow got along really well. While Wonwoo could sometimes be over-enthusiastic, Mingyu could deal, and whenever Mingyu was in a bad mood, Wonwoo could remain unfazed. It just worked.

Their friendship was, in a way, pretty effortless.

And aside from the temporary annoyances that came with being Wonwoo’s friend, Mingyu appreciated that.

Despite himself, Mingyu felt his smile grow into a tilted grin and he chuckled and shook his head at Wonwoo’s words.

“You’re a weirdo.” He concluded and Wonwoo pretended to be offended, placing a hand over his heart.

“Why? Why does that make me weird? Because I want to walk you home? Because Junhui and Soonyoung invited me to the archade today but I told them no and they might’ve gotten a little angry with me because I said I’d rather walk you home?”

Mingyu shot him a disturbed look, but laughter was bubbling within his chest.

“Are you serious? Can you even hear yourself right now?” Wonwoo frowned at his amusement, failing to see why his honest opinion served to entertain Mingyu.

“I don’t get what’s wrong with it.” Mingyu pointed at him.

“That’s exactly what makes you weird.” He said and Wonwoo looked at him with narrowed eyes. “But, you know,” Mingyu shrugged casually. “I don’t mind, so you may walk me home, if you insist.”

“Maybe I’m not so sure if I want to anymore.” Wonwoo replied, crossing his arms, but Mingyu wasn’t fazed by his passive attempt at manipulation.

“Okay. See you tomorrow then.” He said and took larger strides to get ahead of Wonwoo who was quick to uncross his arms and go after him.

“No, c’mon! Don’t be like that. Mingyu, I want to walk you home~!” He grabbed onto the sleeve of Mingyu’s uniform and clung to his arm, making a small scene of acting like a baby and Mingyu bit the inside of his cheek, tricking himself into believing that he didn’t find it cute.

When he got little to no response besides Mingyu turning away, Wonwoo abandoned his childish pretense and straightened up beside him again. He pressed up to Mingyu’s side and forced him to look at him, smiling when Mingyu’s eyes met his.

“Please let me?” He asked sweetly, and Mingyu felt that familiar bubbling and warming sensation he refused to give a name spread throughout his chest and pull at his heartstrings. Happiness.

“Fine.” He asnwered, pretending to be reluctant in his allowance of Wonwoo’s company, but Wonwoo didn’t seem to mind in the slightest and grinned even brighter at Mingyu when he accepted.

As they walked together side-by-side and Mingyu listened to Wonwoo’s sooty voice as the other told him the whole story of Soonyoung’s escapade to a love hotel with his girlfriend (with additional commentary), Mingyu told himself that the warmth within his chest originated from nothing other than the fact that he was happy.

Surely, the nameless emotion stirring up his heart was nothing other than ‘happiness’.

Definitely nothing else.

✧ ✧ ✧

Mingyu was relieved to see the old front door of his small flat as it came into view after he and Wonwoo had climbed the stairs of the cheap, two-story apartment building he resided in, thinking that he would finally be able to just lie down in his bed and relax and allow the stress from all of their school-work to just wash off of him. He really, really wanted to do that.

When Wonwoo had first found out that Mingyu lived on his own because of his father’s financial struggles, he’d been super envious. He’d been sympathetic too, after Mingyu had shot him a look that practically said how insensitive he was being, but mostly he’d been envious. Apparently living alone when one was their age was _really_ _cool_ , according to him, but Mingyu just found it pretty lonely.

Wonwoo was still talking about something or other as Mingyu fished his keys out and unlocked his door. A pause followed after the lock had clicked open, and Mingyu turned around to find Wonwoo standing suspiciously still and perfectly quiet behind him, watching him with aqute attention. Mingyu got a feeling of slight unease in his stomach as he looked at Wonwoo’s expecting smile. He narrowed his eyes, feeling his pulse flutter nervously under Wonwoo’s stare.

“Erh, thanks for walking me home…” He said hesitantly, wondering if there was something else Wonwoo wanted with him before they parted.

“Can I come in?” Wonwoo asked, his voice smooth and his eyes dark. Mingyu held his breath. His hand tightened around the handle of his door and his teeth worried his bottom lip as he considered the question.

Wonwoo waited patiently while Mingyu made a decision.

Exhaling slowly, Mingyu had to remind himself that it was just an innocent request from a friend. Nothing else. Nothing more.

“… Yeah, okay.”

“Sweet!” Wonwoo wasted no time after his agreement and bundled past Mingyu into his one-room apartment while Mingyu spent a minute regulating his breathing by the door before following him inside.

Sometimes Mingyu hated that he couldn’t find it in himself to say no to Wonwoo.

Wonwoo had already kicked off his shoes, dumped his jacket in the hallway and thrown himself on top of Mingyu’s bed when Mingyu came after him, careful not to step on Wonwoo’s carelessly scattered items as he closed the door behind them.

“Hey, let’s watch a movie!” Wonwoo called from atop his mattress. Mingyu frowned.

“Don’t you have any homework you need to do…?” He picked up Wonwoo’s jacket and hung it besides his own on the coathanger by the door in a pointless attempt to keep his livingspace somewhat neat before he ventured further into the single room of his apartment.

Wonwoo gave him a glare. “Boo, no talking about school or homework. Do you have any movies on your laptop?” He quickly changed the subject and Mingyu huffed.

“Some… But not all of them are worth watching.”

He watched Wonwoo climb to the foot of his bed and fish his laptop from the floor before shuffling back up by the pillows and getting comfortable, patting the spot beside him on the bed in invitation to it’s owner.

“Come help me pick one then.”

Although he felt tense all over, Mingyu did as he was told and joined Wonwoo in a search of a good film that they could watch together.

“Is this one good?”

“No, not that one, that one’s super old…”

“… Okay. Well, what about this one? Title’s interesting enough.”

“No. Not that one either. Here, just let me…” Mingyu took the computer out of Wonwoo’s hands and placed it in his own lap, Wonwoo raising his hands in mock surrender.

“ _Fine._ You choose one. But what if I don’t like the one you pick? … Will you take responsebility?”

Mingyu ignored the change of tone in Wonwoo’s voice in his last sentence and pretended to not notice the way the other’s gaze lingered on him or the way it made his skin tingle and his neck feel suddenly hot.

“No way.” He replied quickly. “And you’ll like it.”

“What makes you so sure?” His confident answer had amused Wonwoo and Mingyu turned to eye his crooked grin, his eyes flickering to the other’s lips briefly before they met Wonwoo’s.

“Because I know you.” He said. Wonwoo’s smile widened.

“Allright. Fair enough…” He hummed. As Wonwoo’s eyes began trailing down the shape of Mingyu’s face, Mingyu stressed to turn away and play the movie of his choice with jerky fingers.

“There. Now settle down.” He said, leaning back against his pillows and adjusting the screen to their position.

“Okay.” Wonwoo shuffled closer to his side and rested his head atop Mingyu’s shoulder as the opening credits began to roll, getting comfortable against him. Mingyu tried his best to focus on the movie rather than worrying weather or not Wonwoo was able to hear how loudly his heart was beating at the moment.

 _Just breathe. Relax_ , Mingyu told himself. _Calm down and just_ _take it easy._

And eventually, he did, allowing himself to sink into Wonwoo’s warmth and watch the introduction of the protagonist in peace.

✧ ✧ ✧

One-third into the movie, Mingyu’s breath hitched in his throat when Wonwoo’s warm hand, which had been innocently resting on top of Mingyu’s bicep, began slowly wandering downwards, Wonwoo’s fingers tracing the outline of his chest and ribcage and continuing down along his side with a clear path in mind. Mingyu jerked when they reached his hip, caressing the sensitive skin just above the waistline of his pants in an absolutely tentalizing manner that had his blood boil and rush to his face in the matter of a few seconds.

“…Hey…” His protest was shamefully weak.

Mingyu’s heart was already beating so fast and his voice already sounded too raspy, part of him wanted to disappear, but a larger part of him, the one thrumming with anticipation and setting his nerves into fiery frenzy, really _really_ wanted to stick around for the continuation of what Wonwoo was initiating.

 _Gosh,_ he was so pitiful.

Wonwoo glanced up at him through his thick eyelashes from his spot in the crook between Mingyu’s shoulder and neck, and god, the look in his eyes was bad for Mingyu’s sanity and did nothing to ease the thoughts currently running wild with his imagination in Mingyu’s mind.

He should be telling Wonwoo no, should be pinching his hand to make him stop, should pull away or tell Wonwoo to, but Mingyu couldn’t, and he wondered if Wonwoo knew.

Slowly, Wonwoo’s lips took the shape of a smile, and he tilted his head slightly upwards so that he could look at Mingyu more properly, but then his lips were dangerously close to Mingyu’s jaw, and Mingyu could feel Wonwoo’s breath fan across his heated skin which only made him shiver as Wonwoo’s fingers dragged along the hemline of his pants. Mingyu inhaled sharply when they daringly dipped beneath it and began dancing along the edge of his underwear instead.

Wonwoo observed his reaction with subdued, yet thrilled intrigue.

“Hey yourself.” He mumbled, voice low and grovely and doing all kinds of things to Mingyu’s body.

The bastard had the gall to chuckle under his breath, which only tickled against Mingyu’s skin, and Mingyu’s face burned a shameful shade of red. He involuntarily almost choked on a gasp when Wonwoo’s hand suddenly went lower and straightforwardly caressed the outline of his already half-hard dick through his underwear.

Mingyu’s ears burned and the pace of his thundering pulse picked up in his ears.

Wonwoo hadn’t come inside with the interest to watch a movie with Mingyu. His intention had been to do this sort of thing from the start.

Mingyu couldn’t pretend that he hadn’t already been aware of that.

Mingyu gently placed his hand over Wonwoo’s wrist. (But he didn’t push it away.)

“Wonwoo…”

“Mm…?”

Mingyu twitched and bit back a groan as Wonwoo’s fingers wrapped around his cock and began to stroke it in a teasing manner through the fabric of his boxers, the rumble of Wonwoo’s voice sending electrifying sparks into his heart that caused it to stutter in his chest. The tickling sensation of Wonwoo’s lips brushing lightly against the spot of skin just beneath his ear made Mingyu’s breath catch in his throat.

Mingyu reminded himself that he should be resisting, that they shouldn’t be doing this, and pure will-strength was the only thing that managed to make him grab onto Wonwoo’s wrist again to stop it this time.

Feeling dizzy and flushed and breathless, Mingyu searched for Wonwoo’s gaze.

“We shouldn’t be doing this…”

Wonwoo freed his wrist easily (as if he’d known that Mingyu’s reserve to hold him back hadn’t been that strong to begin with.) and watched Mingyu’s reaction with keen attention as he continued to languidly pump him.

He didn’t miss Mingyu’s tiny gasp and caught the fluttering of the other’s eyelids. He smiled.

“Why not? It feels good right?”

Mingyu could smell the distinct scent of Wonwoo’s schampoo as the other pressed his body closer to Mingyu’s on the bed and turned his head downwards to supervise his fondling of Mingyu’s genitals with perverse interest.

Mingyu inhaled the scent that was so familiar to him before he swallowed around the dryness in his mouth.

“Yeah… But… Friends don’t normally do this kind of thing together…” Wonwoo laughed, the sound a little more breathless now and his flushed cheeks a complete mirror of Mingyu’s.

“Saying that now… Isn’t it a little too late to say those things at this point?”

His fingers unwrapped from Mingyu’s shaft and started tracing around the shape of Mingyu’s head instead and Wonwoo looked up at him from beneath his dark bangs, his slanted eyes heavily lidded and absolutely alluring, their dark intensity sending a thrill straight down Mingyu’s spine to his balls.

“Doing this feels good. You agree with me, right…?”

Mingyu bit down on his bottom lip when Wonwoo pressed against him and began rubbing him through his underwear again while speaking in that low and seductive voice of his, almost whispering the words into Mingyu’s ear as he ground against him.

“You feel good… You make _me_ feel good… So, let’s just enjoy ourselves together.”

Mingyu’s only reply was a low grunt that tore from the back of his throat. Lust and desire took charge of his body and actions without having to put up much of a fight against his better judgement at all, and Mingyu’s hands went down to swiftly undo his pants, much to Wonwoo’s apparent pleasure.

“… Please stop teasing and touch me directly.”

Even as he spoke so straightforwardly, Mingyu’s cheeks burned hotly and his voice was breathless, but Wonwoo seemed excited to comply with his request and only gave him a toothy grin in reply.

“Yes, sir~”

Mingyu held back a moan when Wonwoo’s warm fingers wrapped around his member, having used the newfound access from his undone pants to eagerly dip under the hemline of his boxer briefs and touch him directly. The hand of the arm that had been serving as Wonwoo’s pillow during the movie entangled in Wonwoo’s dark locks, and Mingyu swore he could feel Wonwoo smile against his collarbone when he gripped his hair.

Neither of them minded when the laptop slid off of Mingyu’s abdomnen and fell onto the floor.

Wonwoo’s hand was warm and squeezed Mingyu not too tight, just perfect, and the tantalizing pace that he held served to drive Mingyu crazy with arousal. It felt great, so good, but it wasn’t nearly enough, but of course Wonwoo was well aware of that. He just enjoyed teasing Mingyu by taunting him to see how long he’d allow him to mess around before he was unable to stand it anymore and unravelled completely under his touch, and maybe Mingyu kind of enjoyed it a little too. (Maybe even a lot.)

“Ngh…”

Mingyu was already leaking pre-cum. He could feel Wonwoo’s thumb spread the slickness over his head ( _God…_ ) but he wasn’t embarrassed. They’d passed the stages of feeling bashfull or ashamed with each other a while ago.

When another small groan slithered past Mingyu’s lips, Wonwoo chukled breathlessly against his skin. By adjusting the twist of his wrist Wonwoo made Mingyu’s breath hitch, his body jerking into Wonwoo’s hand and his hand tightening its grip in Wonwoo’s hair as another melodic moan rippled out of him.

“D’you like that?”

The hum of Wonwoo’s voice was hot and warm and thick like melted chocolate to Mingyu’s ears.

“Mm, yeah…” Mingyu was one hundred percent sure that Wonwoo could hear the loud pounding of his heart from where he was laying.

He tugged at Wonwoo’s hair to make the other look up at him so that he could meet his gaze. Wonwoo’s eyes were darkened by desire but at the same time they were absolutely brilliant, and Mingyu felt as if he’d been ignited from just looking into them. The intensity of their fire completely and utterly scorched him and dehydrated his insides and his voice came out in a raspy quiver when he voiced the request that itched within his throat.

“Let me touch you too.”

A spark of delightment flashed in Wonwoo’s gaze and he couldn’t keep the happy grin from appearing on his face.

“Okay.”

Mingyu was glad he wasn’t the only one sounding breathless in this situation.

The bed dipped as Wonwoo got up from his position beside Mingyu and Mingyu moved with him, sitting up with his back against the wall while Wonwoo climbered onto his lap, towering over Mingyu and shadowing the both of them from the light of his cheap ceiling fan. Mingyu’s heart fluttered in his chest as his hungrily eyes raked over the other’s body.

Wonwoo’s hands quickly found leverage against Mingyu and one slipped right back in between them to snuggly wrap around Mingyu’s member again. He leant over Mingyu and crowded them into their own little bubble of existance, his gaze heavy and his voice soft.

“I should finish you off first.”

Mingyu was glad that he could watch the tweak of Wonwoo’s lips and the attractive flush of his cheeks now that he was on top of him, and he think he made a grunt of agreement (but maybe it sounded more like a whine, he wasn’t sure.) before he lost himself in the sensations of Wonwoo’s touch again, letting his head fall back against the wall with a small thump, a groan spilling from him.

He knew Wonwoo was watching him, could feel the hot burn of his gaze on his face. He knew Wonwoo could see the flush of his chest creeping up his neck, the way he bit his bottom lip to keep the noises that reverbated in the back of his throat with every tug of Wonwoo’s wrist down, the newly formed sweat that had his bangs stick to his forehead, and the small crease between his eyebrows as he tried to keep himself together even though he was falling apart. For some wicked reason, Mingyu absolutely loved it. Knowing Wonwoo’s eyes were on him, watching him, seeing him unravell like this excited him beyond anything else. It was an unforgiving craving and greed that almost terrified him to a point of no return, but it was also an absolutely addictive sensation of euphoria, and Mingyu would never be able to tear himself away from the pleasure these heated moments he shared with Wonwoo offered him, and part of him hated himself for that. Hated that he was so utterly weak and pathetic under Wonwoo’s touch.

He came with a broken moan, his hands squeezing tightly around Wonwoo’s biceps, and Wonwoo didn’t let go of his dick until he had milked Mingyu to his very last drop, giving it a final squeeze before he retrieved his hand from Mingyu’s pants and wiped it off against Mingyu’s duvet somewhere beside them.

Lingering in the bliss of his post-orgasm, Mingyu felt completely relaxed, his body heavy and his head light as endorphines rushed through his system and pulled at his eyelids to close, but he still found the strength and energy within himself to reach out and tug at Wonwoo’s sweater.

“… Now let me do you.”

Mingyu’s pulse fluttered as Wonwoo laughed at his assertive tone and sharp gaze.

“Please do.” He replied once he was done, smiling handsomely, but Mingyu could tell that he was eager and just slightly impatient to have his go at being touched by the way he was bouncing slightly on his knees.

Mingyu grabbed Wonwoo’s shoulders and rolled them sideways so that he could end up lying on his left side, resting on his arm, allowing him to lean over Wonwoo who was now lying on his back. Wonwoo had released a surprised yelp at the sudden change of position, but when Mingyu looked down into his eyes he found nothing but anticipation in his gaze as he stared back at Mingyu and waited for him to proceed, so Mingyu did.

He took his hand and moved it down to Wonwoo’s groin where he let it ghost over the outline of the other’s erection (Mingyu couldn’t help but feel a little smug and very thrilled by the fact that Wonwoo had been aroused by him) and watched the twitch of Wonwoo’s nose and listened to the hitch of his breath as it was now Mingyu’s turn to taunt him.

Wonwoo’s arms came up and wrapped around Mingyu’s shoulders, his smile never leaving his face.

“Stop teasing, that’s no — fun.”

Mingy allowed the corners of his lips to turn up into a smirk.

“No? Wasn’t it you just now who seemed to be enjoying yourself while you teased me before?” Mingyu’s smirk widened when Wonwoo jerked beneath him, letting his hand hover just over the other’s clothed member.

“Mm, maybe… But you’re not patient enough to practice that.”

Mingyu raised an elegant eyebrow.

“Wanna test me?” He challenged.

“… Okay, you’re not _cruel_ enough to practice that.” Wonwoo corrected himself and then pulled a frustrated expression at Mingyu when he kept tracing featherlight patterns around his dick.

“Come on, Mingyu, _please…!_ Touch me already.”

Wonwoo was right, Mingyu wasn’t cruel enough to leave him hanging for much longer than he had, but everything from the tug Mingyu received of his hair to getting to watch the impatient expression of Wonwoo’s face morph into an open-mouthed but silent moan when he finally did dip his hand into Wonwoo’s pants and wrapped his fingers around his warm cock was absolutely worth withholding for.

Wonwoo’s fingers dug into the back of Mingyu’s skull when he started moving his hand up and down his length and a low, elongated groan that made Mingyu’s heart stutter sounded from his lips as he squeezed his eyes shut and clung to Mingyu.

As he worked Wonwoo’s shaft Mingyu watched the flutter of Wonwoo’s eyelashes against his cheekbones and the deep rose staining his cheeks in a completely and undeniably attractive flush, the mezmerising rise of his chest and the enticing curve of his parted lips, finding himself utterly captivated by all of it.

Wonwoo like this, breathless, flushed, lying beneath him on top of his bed, submissive, inviting, _erotic_ , was someone Mingyu found extremely appealing.

And that terrified him a little.

Mingyu fingered at Wonwoo’s head and Wonwoo’s fingers tightened in his hair, inhaling sharply and morphing the oxygen into a shuddering moan.

“Mingyu…! That—”

“Was nice?” Mingyu repeated the motion and intentionally robbed Wonwoo of the ability to respond as another moan bubbled out of him.

Wonwoo was desperatedly clinging to Mingyu now, clawing at his back and gripping his hair firmly as if he was his only lifeline, the only thing grounding him to the real world as he was losing himself in the ocean of pleasure currently ruling his body and fogging his mind, and Mingyu didn’t mind in the least. He allowed Wonwoo to tug him closer, push up against him and press their foreheads together, taking the opportunity to closely watch Wonwoo’s face contort in a pleasured grimace. (As if he could burn the picture into his memory for the rest of eternity if he didn’t look away.)

“Does it feel nice?”

Mingyu liked how low his voice sounded, like a deep, strong rumble. He felt at ease and in control, powerful, and he liked that. A lot.

Wonwoo could only nod feverishly, his breath hot as it fanned against Mingyu’s cheeks and lips, his mouth parted and his eyes squeezed shut as he trembled.

“Nnh…! Y–yeah, feels — feels _great_ , mmh...! Mingyu…”

Mingyu could tell Wonwoo was close, and when he heard his name roll off Wonwoo’s tongue he got encouraged to speed the progression of the other’s orgasm up and started to stroke Wonwoo’s dick faster, squeezing and twisting in the way he had learnt that Wonwoo liked.

His change of pace earned him an immidiate reaction, and Wonwoo gasped and jerked voilently against him.

“Mingyu…!”

Wonwoo’s body twisted and turned under Mingyu, lewd noises pouring out of him now as he neared his point of erruption, grabbing onto and clutching at any part of Mingyu he could reach. (Wonwoo was kind of clingy, and he was also way more vocal in these situations compared to Mingyu, but Mingyu didn’t really mind. Secretly, he found it kind of cute.)

“ _Fuck…!_ ”

Wonwoo’s dick throbbed in Mingyu’s grasp, and then his entire body convulsed and he shuddered under Mingyu as he came, Mingyu feeling Wonwoo’s hot seed shoot out of him and coat his fingers as well as probably staining the inside of his underwear in the process as he finished. Mingyu didn’t let go until Wonwoo’s cock had throbbed one last time.

Carefully, Mingyu untagled himself from Wonwoo’s embrace and got up to wash his hand. When he got back he sat back down on the bed, but placed a mindfull distance between his and Wonwoo’s bodies now that they were done.

He watched Wonwoo bask in the after-bliss of his orgasm with a sated expression, his eyes closed and his facial expression completely relaxed, and a peaceful atmosphere settled around them in the small one-room apartment where nothing was said by either of them for a couple of minutes, both boys enjoying the serenity of the silence.

In the meantime, Mingyu willed his rapid heartbeat to calm down.

Finally, Wonwoo moved, reaching his arms above his head and unfolding his legs, a pleased groan accompanying the easy smile on his face as he stretched out and popped a few bones on Mingyu’s bed. He cracked his eyes open and sat up afterwards, looking to Mingyu with bright eyes.

“Wow… Doing that always manages to make me feel super relaxed.” He exhaled, looking happy and joyous after his climax.

Mingyu snorted and crossed his arms.

“I think that’s a natural biologic reaction.” He responded, ignoring the tightness in his chest.

“ _I_ think it’s because it feels nice.” Wonwo grinned. Then he glanced at the laptop, which had closed upon falling onto the floor and thus stopped playing the movie they’d been watching before they’d started playing with each other instead.

“Shame about the movie, though. It was kind of interesting.”

“We can still finish it, if you want. Also, what can I say? I told you you’d like it.” Mingyu managed a crooked smile.

Wonwoo’s grin widened.

“Yeah, you did. You really do know me the best.”

They were back to acting like normal, and Mingyu told himself he should be feeling relieved. But he wasn’t. Instead, he felt as if a knife was slowy cuting into his heart, and a huge lump was starting to take shape in his throat as they returned to being friends.

“But,” Wonwoo rose from the bed and Mingyu watched him stand and take the three strides it took to get from Mingyu’s bed to his hallway where he started to redress into his shoes and jacket. “I’ve got to go, so maybe I could come back and finish it another time.”

Mingyu didn’t let his disapointment show on his face once Wonwoo looked back at him.

“Would that be okay?” He asked, zipping up his jacket and waiting for Mingyu’s reply.

Mingyu offered a bleak smile.

Wonwoo knew he couldn’t say no.

“Yeah, sure.” He said, ignoring the painful scratch the empty words left in his throat.

Mingyu _hated_ that he couldn’t say no to Wonwoo.

Wonwoo, completely oblivious to Mingyu’s inner suffering, flashed his friend a huge smile.

“Cool! Thanks for the good time, as usual~ I’ll see you tomorrow?”

It was phrased as a question, but they both knew they would unevitably see each other in school anyway, so Mingyu didn’t understand the point.

“Unfortunately.” At least he found some amusement in the disgruntled huff his choice of wording managed to pull from Wonwoo.

“Is that realy how you feel? You’re making me depressed. Don’t go breaking my heart, Mingyu.” Wonwoo warned, but his carefree smile told Mingyu that he wasn’t being serious.

Mingyu wondered why his words stung so badly.

Feeling that they were done talking, Wonwoo turned around and opened Mingyu’s door to step outside. He looked back over his shoulder at Mingyu who was still sitting on the edge of his bed before he fully left.

“Bye now! And seriously, thanks again, Mingyu. See you tomorrow!” He gave Mingyu one last cheerful grin and a wave.

Mingyu returned neither.

“Yeah…” He just said. “… Bye.”

The door shut after Wonwoo and Mingyu was left alone, sitting on his bed, staring at the flaking colour of the old door and the afterimage of someone who was no longer there.

✧ ✧ ✧

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Plot, what plot? Oh, the one where Mingyu is hopelessly in love with Wonwoo~! Right, yeah. We're getting to that. (Smut cures cancer. Hurry up and share with your friends.)
> 
> Leave a comment! All thoughts, feedback, and opinions are welcomed~ 
> 
> This fic is also published on asianfanfics.com, so if you're interested in subscribing and catching the latest updates as soon as they're uploaded, head over there~ (Of course I'll update here as well, but I'll keep my base at AFF)
> 
> Until next time!


	2. Who do you blame when no one is at fault?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More about their "benefitial friendship", how it started, and Mingyu's feelings for Wonwoo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How do you like BOOM BOOM? I'm in love with it. (Esp with Wonwoo *cries* He'll always blow me away.)

✧ ✧ ✧

 

The first time it had happened it had been purely accidental on both Mingyu and Wonwoo’s part.

Wonwoo had somehow gotten his hands on three bottles of Soju and had out of excitement and convinience come to Mingyu’s place to share them with him and have his first experience with alcohol 1) someplace his father wouldn’t unexpectedly walk in and catch him drinking even though he was still underage and 2) with someone he liked and trusted.

Mingyu hadn’t shared his excitement and had declined the ilegally possesed bottle that Wonwoo had offered him. He didn’t feel any particular desire to try alcohol. (Although, he had still ended up letting Wonwoo inside, as he had figured it would’ve been better if Wonwoo got drunk indoors in the company of a friend rather than alone in some dark alley somewhere. He didn’t put it past him, actually.)

His straightforward rejection had made Wonwoo a little stingy at first, and then he had bravely declared that since Mingyu wouldn’t drink with him, he would finish all of the Soju on his own, to which Mingyu had snorted and encouraged him, mostly because he’d wanted to see if Wonwoo would be able to actually do it, and partly because it ensured him free entertainment and possible black-mail material for a future possible crisis, neither of which he had felt like passing up the oportunity of.

Wonwoo had stood up to the challenge, and Mingyu had anticipated the result with amusement.

In hindsight, it hadn’t been such a good idea.

Like one would expect, Wonwoo had ended up completely smashed and Mingyu’s evening had morphed into a completely dreadfull night spent deling with a horribly-drunk-off-their-ass-for-the-first-time-super-excited-hyper person. Yeah.

Someway, somehow, in the really late or really early hours, (honestly, by that time, which one of them could tell?) Wonwoo’s drunk lips had ended up capturing sober Mingyu’s lips in a kiss, and then things had just kind of… escelated from there.

Mingyu would argue that he had acted responsibly. He had pushed Wonwoo away and told him that doing that while he was under the influence of an alcoholic substance that affected his judgement _really_ wasn’t a good idea, that it would affect their friendship, and that he would probably come to regret it in the morning.

But Wonwoo had persisted, twisted and turned Mingyu’s words around and against him, slurred sweet nothings and promises and had managed to convince Mingyu that it was _fine_. Doing things together _, touching each other_ was fine as long as it felt good, and Wonwoo had _wanted_ to feel good, so it was fine _. It was fine._

Mingyu had known that Wonwoo hadn’t been in his right state of mind. _Mingyu had_ _known_ , but he had still temporarily pretended to be ignorant of that small but oh-so-very-significant fact. He had fooled himself into believing that he was naïve and had allowed himself to get seduced by Wonwoo’s drunken whispers and very warm hands.

Afterwards, things had never gone back to the way they had been.

Things changed, but not in the way one would suspect. Rather than regretting their actions and/or being revolted by what had transpired between them like most guys would have been, Wonwoo had had an optimistic outlook on the ‘slip’ in their friendship and had indulged the two of them in a second run as soon as the following morning.

When they talked about it, Mingyu learnt that Wonwoo had been honest while he’d been drunk and had told Mingyu that it was fine. It had felt good, and it had been both exciting and fun, so as long as Mingyu wasn’t opposed to it, Wonwoo wanted to continue doing it together. And Mingyu couldn’t say no to Wonwoo.

So, things just continued from there.

They remained close. They remained as friends. Just, sometimes, they were the type of friends who snuck away to a secluded corner or hidden room and helped each other out by jerking each other off. (They did it in school, during breaks, on the weekends, at Mingyu’s place, in Wonwoo’s house when his parents weren’t home, e.t.c.)

They sneaked around a lot, and lately, Mingyu felt as if he was hiding from something.

Mingyu could tell that Wonwoo didn’t think about the things they did much, didn’t mull it over in his head before he went to sleep, didn’t take it seriously and only viewed it as a new way to play around whilst having a good time.

But Mingyu thought about it a lot, the things they did. He thought about it over and over again, until it occupied his every waking thought and he felt as if he was going crazy.

Wonwoo was fine. _They_ were fine. Their friendship was _fine_ and their arrangement was _great_.

Mingyu just wasn’t so sure if _he_ was fine anymore.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

It was already winter. Mingyu didn’t particularly like the snow, or the cold, as it meant more garments and thicker clothes had to go onto one’s body just so that you could go outside. It was too much work and required more effort than he deemed necessary for a task as tedious as getting dressed.

His sneakers had been exchanged for boots already and Mingyu shoved his hands deep into his pockets to at least attempt to keep them a little warm as he stepped out of the front-doors of the school on a boring Thursday afternoon.

The sky was clear and the air was crips and biting and the trees in the schoolyard had all shed their leaves and stood naked with their branches dusted by shimmering white snow. When Mingyu exhaled a visible cloud of carbon dioxide ascended into the air in front of him before it dissipated into nothing.

Mingyu had to admit winter, no matter how much he disliked the cold, could be very pretty.

“Oh! Mingyu!”

“Ah, it’s Mingyu-ssi.”

Mingyu slowed his step until he came to a halt and looked to the source of the voices.

A few metres away stood the building of the P.E hall (it was detached from the rest of the school, but tied to the east wing through an outdoor walkway) and Mingyu spotted Junhui and Wonwoo leaning out of one of the windows of the far end of the building, waving at him.

He only hesitated for a second before he began making his way over to them through the snow.

“Hey.” He greeted once he was near enough.

“Bro, this is _exactly_ what I was talking about."

Mingyu had reached them mid-conversation, and Junhui turned to him.

“You’re not freezing at all in that scarf, are you?” He gestured towards his person.

Automatically, one of Mingyu’s hands went up to finger at mentioned scarf safely tucked around his neck. It kept him warm.

“Yeah, not really.” He agreed.

“Aigo, I tell you Jun, if you don’t want to freeze to death you better hurry and ask your girlfriend to knit one for you before Christmas is over!” Wonwoo laughed and Junhui frowned, looking petulent and stingy for a few moments.

“Who opened the window? It’s _freezing,_ come on!” Someone called from further into the boys’ changingroom, but neither Junhui nor Wonwoo made any sign to acknowledge the request.

“Tuck your dick in, Changkyun, and stop whining! Hello, Mingyu-ssi!” Jihoon’s amused voice called from somewhere to the right behind Junhui, but he couldn’t see the male from where he was standing.

“You just finish class?” Mingyu asked, looking to Wonwoo.

“Nah, class hasn’t even started yet.” Wonwoo grinned. Soonyoung casually joined them mid-way through Wonwoo’s sentence, slinging an arm around Wonwoo’s shoulder and waving at Mingyu who waved back.

“It starts in ten minutes.” The now silver haired boy contributed to their conversation. He’d gone from blonde, to blue, to washed-out blue, to briefly purple just over the last few months, only finally ending his adventerous colour journey when he’d dyed it grey. (It was an odd and unusual choice of colour, but it suited him, Mingyu had concluded. Maybe he’d be brave enough to give it a try sometime.)

“Who in their right mind forces people to wear _thin uniforms_ and do _sports_ in the _winter?_ _Ugh._ It’s torture!” Soonyoung whined.

Mingyu wanted to point out that they would be doing sports _indoors_ , not outdoors, and that their uniforms were actually accomondated to the seasons, what with them wearing T-shirts and shorts in the warm months and jackets and trousers in the cold months, but Wonwoo moving about distracted Mingyu and he forgot all about it.

“Hup!”

Wonwoo made a small noise as he used his arms as leverage and swung his legs over the window ledge, jumping out and landing in front of Mingyu in the snow.

“What the heck?” Soonyoung looked down at his friend suddenly stood outdoors.

“… What are you doing?” Mingyu related to Junhui’s questioning grimace.

Wonwoo forsook answering his friend to give Mingyu a smile instead.

“So what are you up to?” He asked innocently and genuinely curiously enough. Mingyu shrugged.

“I’m done for the day so I’m heading home.”

“Wow, lucky~” Soonyoung commented in the window.

“You’re done for the day already? Ah, I’m envious.”

Mingyu felt a smile tug at his lips.

He looked at Wonwoo’s slim frame standing outdoors in the snow in the middle of winter dressed in nothing but his sports uniform and school provided sneakers and raised his eyebrows.

“Aren’t you cold?” he asked, wondering why he was still amused by Wonwoo’s strange antics at this point.

“Nah, it’s not _that_ bad. Besides, I don’t plan on staying _here_ for long.”

“Good luck climbing back inside.” Junhui snorted and Mingyu thought it’d be very entertaining to watch Wonwoo attempt to get back inside through the window as it was placed slightly higher up than usual from the ground they were standing on.

Junhui checked his phone for the time and while Soonyoung stuck his hand out the window for Wonwoo, offering to help him back up.

“C’mon, Wonnie-yah. Get back in here, class is going to start.” He said and made grabby-hands at him. Wonwoo didn’t seem all that bothered and ignored him, busying himself with staring at Mingyu who blinked at being studied in such concentration.

“You should go back inside.” He said, and Wonwoo hummed absentmindedly, seeming to ponder about something for a while.

Jihoon joined his classmates in the window and looked strangely at Wonwoo standing in the snow across from Mingyu.

“What the heck is going on here? What are you doing?” He asked anyone willing to provide him with an explenation and Junhui made a vague gesture with his hands.

“No clue, really.”

“Wonwoo jumped out the window.” Soonyoung told the shorter male matter-of-factly, and the light brunette blinked slowly at him.

“… I can see that.” He said replied and Soonyoung shrunk slightly under his glare, grinning uncertainly.

In the meantime Wonwoo seemed to have come to a decision and suddenly grabbed ahold of Mingyu’s wrist, startling the younger.

“Come on.” He said and turned around, leading Mingyu away form the changingroom window and the P.E bulding without offering any sort of explenation.

“They’re leaving.” Jihoon said and the remaining two whipped their heads around to find that he was correct.

“Hey! What about class?” Junhui asked, staring bewildered after them and the footprints they left in the snow. Wonwoo sent him a grin over his shoulder.

“I’m skipping!” He replied with a shout as he continued to drag Mingyu behind him in some random direction. Soonyoung and Junhui’s responses went undecipherable (although from the latter it sounded an awful lot like swearing in Mandarin) and Mingyu swore he heard Jihoon heave a very heavy sigh before they were well out of ears reach.

Mingyu gaped perplexed whilst he blindly followed Wonwoo’s lead, stumbling after him through the snow.

“What? _Why?_ ” He asked to Wonwoo’s unexpected declaration.

Wonwoo laughed at his confused expression.

“I want to show you something.”

“Where are we going?”

“You’ll see when we get there.”

He was avoiding answering Mingyu’s questions and Mingyu pulled a face, but Wonwoo’s back was turned towards him so he didn’t catch it.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

“What, just this place?”

Wonwoo stomped his feet to rid his shoes of the snow that had amassed under his sneakers soles before he entered the room. Noticing, Mingyu followed his example before following him into the messy, dim-lit clubroom with less ethusiasm, shutting the door behind them.

Wonwoo walked into the middle of the small, re-arranged classroom with a smile on his face, his cheeks rosy from the walk in the cold. (During which their fingers had ended up intertwined and entangled and Mingyu had constantly compared the heat of Wonwoo’s hand with his own and found that their fingers were equally as cold even though he’d been wearing a lot more garments.)

“Isn’t it neat?” Wonwoo said, heading up to the blinds covering the windows and changing them enough for the light reflected off of the snow outside to shine in through the small gaps and light up the dusty art-room partly.

Mingyu looked around at the half-finished statues and paintings scattered all over the desks and walls and at the paint tubes placed somewhat orderly close by a stack of paint plates with a frown.

‘Neat’ wasn’t a word he’d use to describe the room they were standing in.

Wonwoo had turned back around and was now facing him with that grin that never seemed to leave his face whenever he was around Mingyu. The light behind him made it appear as if he was almost glowing.

“The art club doesn’t frequent this room as much as they used to anymore, since most art can be done digitally nowadays anyways, so they just use the computers in the computer hall and leave this room unattended. Sometimes they don’t come here for weeks on end and the room gathers quite a lot of dust in the meantime.” Wonwoo laughed and Mingyu couldn’t tear his eyes away from Wonwoo’s face.

“I kind of like it here, actually.”

Mingyu couldn’t really understand why or what about the room that Wonwoo found appealing as he looked around.

He stopped besides a clay figure of some sorts and poked at it, scrunching his nose up at the dust that stuck to his fingertip afterwards.

“It’s kind of old. And dirty.” He commented.

Wonwoo had walked over to join him and seemed amused by Mingyu’s scepticism.

“Well, it’s a little off, all the way at the far end of the third years floor, but it’s quiet, and secluded, and kind of cozy. Don’t you agree…?”

Only now did Mingyu catch onto Wonwoo’s tone and when he slowly turned his head to look at Wonwoo, he caught that mischievious glimmer in his eyes that had his heart do small flips inside his chest.

Maybe it was because Mingyu had accomondated to the chill outside, or maybe it was because of the anticipation that lit a fire within him and rushed through his blood, but suddenly the dusty air within the cramped art-room felt thin and warm around Mingyu and made him feel hot and deprived of air.

He straightened up and looked at Wonwoo. Mingyu’s pulse thundered in his ears, and suddenly he could kind of understand why Wonwoo liked this room and why he had lead him there.

Wonwoo didn’t need to say anything, didn’t even need to ask. His eyes expressed enough of his intentions, and Mingyu wasn’t able to deny him anything anyway.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

“Uwah—!”

Mingyu raised an eyebrow and looked up, giving Wonwoo a weird look after his strange outcry.

Wonwoo looked surprised himself as he met Mingyu’s gaze, one of his hands covering his mouth while the other supported his weight against Mingyu’s shoulder. Then he started laughing.

“Sorry, just now — that was — This is not going to work.” He managed between snickers, his voice strained with hilarity.

Mingyu didn’t reply, but neither did he withdraw his hands from the edge of Wonwoo’s uniform joggers where they rested, having paused their advancement at Wonwoo’s sudden yelp.

“It’s just — your hands. They’re really cold.” Wonwoo explained, hiding his smile behind his hand and Mingyu understood why he’d startled at his touch. “It’s kind of uncomfortable.”

Mingyu thought about it for a while. Then he tugged at Wonwoo’s pants, pulling them down along with Wonwoo’s underwear just far enough so that he had full access to the other’s cock.

Wonwoo dutifully raised his hips and allowed Mingyu to partly remove his joggers even though he looked sceptical to weather Mingyu had listened to him or not.

“Hey—”

“Here.” Mingyu took Wonwoo’s hand in his and met his puzzled gaze. “I won’t use my hands. So in the meantime, warm them up for me.” He said and watched as Wonwoo’s cheeks flushed pink with a sense of achievement swelling inside his chest at the sight.

Wonwoo wasn’t daft and had quickly caught on to what Mingyu was intending.

“ _Wha—_ But that’s —! O-okay…!” He stuttered, looking flustered and excited and eager at the same time, all of which Mingyu found kind of adorable.

He lowered himself along Wonwoo’s body until he was level with the other’s crotch and briefly glanced upwards to behold the expression currently dressing Wonwoo’s face.

Wonwoo’s lips were pressed together tightly and his cheeks were flushed dark as he watched Mingyu with intent eyes. His gaze was kindled by anticipation and desire and Mingyu felt a shiver of arousal run down his spine for having Wonwoo’s complete and total attention on him.

It delighted him immensly, and he wanted Wonwoo to never look away.

Wonwoo squeezed Mingyu’s hands tightly the entire time, and in one way, Mingyu found the experience kind of sweet.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

“Whops! Sorry!”

Mingyu looked up from his history assignment at the sound of Wonwoo’s voice and turned around to find the other making an apolegetic handgesture towards one of his classmates from the ajar classrooomdoor.

Lee Seokmin looked mildly confused, holding a hand to his head and looking between Wonwoo and the thrown papper ball that had hit him right in the temple.

The majority of the class threw inquisitive glances at the upperclassman standing in the door while Mingyu irately wondered with burning ears why Wonwoo was there when he was supposed to be in his homeroom for self-study like everybody else.

It was lucky the teacher had gone to the toilet. (Maybe Wonwoo had even waited for that specific moment to bother Mingyu. Actually, he probably had.)

“Could you pass that to Mingyu?” Wonwoo’s smile could charm even the angriest of people, and Seokmin was already a kind soul, so he hesitantly did as he was asked and picked the ball of paper up and threw it to Mingyu who was sat in the third row from the front.

Mingyu caught the ball and sent it flying with a perfect shot into the bin by the teacher’s desk, ignoring Wonwoo’s wail of complaint before a teacher caught him in the hallway and forced him back to his own homeroom with a noisy lecture, every single one of Mingyu’s classmates looking after the departing commotion as it went.

Mingyu’s deskmate, Xu Minghao, paused his report and gave him a sideways glance with one eyebrow quirked higher than the other on his forehead in question to Mingyu’s discarding of the note.

“…You’re not going to read it?” He asked in a whisper.

Mingyu shook his head, ears burning in embarrassment as he could feel the people in his class glance at him with mixed levels of curiosity.

“No.” He hissed back and stubbornly returned to his assignment.

Mingyu didn’t want Wonwoo’s stupid notes. He didn’t want to look at Wonwoo’s stupidly neat handwriting, didn’t want to read Wonwoo’s stupidly sweet words, didn’t want to feel his pulse quicken and his heart flutter like some stupid girl in front of his nosy classmates.

And, he didn’t want Minghao to catch a glance of what place and what time Wonwoo wanted Mingyu to meet him after school to do the stupid things that they did.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

“ _Jikes!_ They’re saying that it won’t get any warmer until March. How are we supposed to _survive_ that long?”

As soon as they stepped out of the cosy, little rameyon place and into the chill afternoon air Wonwoo was complaining and Mingyu found it rather amusing.

“By dressing appropriately and not being stupid enough to live after the ‘dress-to-impress’ saying like any real rational person.” He made his point by eyening Wonwoo’s black leather jacket, which did have an inner coating of faux fur, but couldn’t be considered more than a ‘late autumn jacket’, which, in other words, was very _unsuitable_ for the freezing winter they were finding themselves halfway through.

Wonwoo grinned at him, his nose and ears turning red from the cold even though he had his scarf wrapped high around his neck.

“Don’t be envious, _Mingyu_. I know my fashion sense is superior to the majority of the people in this country — including you — but being _salty_ about it just promotes negative energy, and winter is dark and depressing as it is already.”

Mingyu rolled his eyes.

“Uh-huh. You’re going to freeze your face off.”

“I’m not worried about freezing. If it ever got to that point though, you’d warm me up, wouldn’t you?” Wonwoo blinked at him and Mingyu couldn’t tell him he was wrong, so he bit his tongue instead.

Wonwoo’s smile widened.

“But hey, it really _is_ cold today. Wanna come to my house and defrost a little?” He tried to make the invitation sound innocent, to keep his expression neutral and to not stare at Mingyu too obviously, but ultimately (and funily, in Mingyu’s opinion) he failed at all three.

Mingyu puckered his lips and considered it.

“We could make hot cocoa.” Wonwoo bribed without shame.

“Alright.” Mingyu agreed after making a show out of debating with himself (although no part of him had argued against the proposal). He told himself it was because the offer of a warm beverage was too tempting to turn down in the freezing temperatures they were suffering.

“Alright!” Wonwoo seemed ever so thrilled to have Mingyu coming over and they adjusted their course so that they were walking in the direction of the Jeon family’s house.

Mingyu watched Wonwoo exhale clouds of smoke into the air as they walked and felt a smile pull at his lips.

“…You’re not going to text your parents and tell them I’ll be over?” He asked curiously when Wonwoo hadn’t shown any sign of retreiving his phone from the backpocket of his jeans after a couple of minutes had passed.

Wonwoo gave him a long, sideways glance and the corners of his mouth twitched.

“Well, they’re not home.” He said slowly.

“Oh.” Mingyu stared ahead of himself.

Maybe it was the tiny excited skip in Wonwoo’s step or the sudden eager hurry in Mingyu’s stride that had started it, but neither could stop grinning for the remaining entirety of the race to Wonwoo’s house.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

Mingyu had to swallow and blink his eyes hard to make sure he hadn’t fallen asleep and was dreaming as Wonwoo shimmied down his body after they’d both stumbled in through the door and somehow gotten out of their jackets and shoes before Wonwoo had pushed Mingyu backwards through the hallway, into the livingroom, shoved him onto the big couch in front of the Jeons’ TV and gotten on top of him.

“Uh, hey…” Mingyu felt suddenly shy and embarassed as he watched Wonwoo undo his pants and pull him out of his boxer shorts. His heart had lodged somewhere within his throat two minutes ago.

Wonwoo looked up at him with passionate eyes and a wanton smile adoring his lips.

“I wanna try it too.” He announced breathlessly, a little bashfully, but decisively all the same.

Mingyu’s breath hitched and the blood that would have rushed to his head rushed south instead as Wonwoo’s fingers wrapped around his dick.

“Tell me if I’m doing anything wrong…” Wonwoo said before he lowered his head and took Mingyu into his hot and wet mouth.

Having Wonwoo’s lips around his cock and getting to watch him sucking him off whilst also getting to thread his fingers thorugh the locks of Wonwoo’s hair was probably one of Mingyu’s new favourite things. Nothing they’d done together previously could compare to how good Wonwoo’s mouth felt around his cock.

It might not come as a surprise that they forgot all about preparing cocoa.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

Wonwoo only nudged Mingyu’s arm when they happened to pass each other by in the hallway after Christmas and New Years had passed and school was back into full swing. (They’d kept busy with each other over break… Mingyu felt as if he was digging himself into a deeper hole as the weeks slipped them by.)

“ _Come to the art-room after school._ ”

A whisper, and then he was gone, disappearing around the corner whilst laughing at something Soonyoung had said.

Mingyu was slightly scandalized by himself when he almost grew so impatient he couldn’t wait for the seconds on the clock to go by faster, Minghao shooting him strange looks all throughout last period because he wouldn’t stop bouncing his leg or wringing his hands, but he didn’t get to feel ashamed of his behaviour as he practically dashed out of class once the bell rung in a hurry to go to the far end of the third years floor.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

“What — What if someone comes by?” Mingyu swallowed around his tongue.

Wonwoo laughed breathily, the puffs of air feeling cool against Mingyu’s flushed neck.

“That’s part of the fun.” He said with a smile and flicked his wrist, and Mingyu could only groan low in his throat in response.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

Actually getting found out wouldn’t be fun though, and Mingyu knew that.

Wonwoo was pretty carefree, and maybe a little bit careless when it came to their small escapades, and Mingyu felt as if he was the only one out of the two of them that got anxious sometimes. Anxious that Soonyoung would question why the two of them were always together, anxious that Junhui would catch them when Wonwoo’s hand would secretly intertwine with Mingyu’s behind his friends’ backs, anxious that Jihoon would begin to look at them strangely after having seen the way Wonwoo made Mingyu’s face heat up one too many times, anxious that anyone at anytime would happen upon them with their hands wrapped around each others’ dicks, because _usually_ , friends didn’t do that.

 _Two guys_ especially didn’t do that. But they did.

Wonwoo’s body was just so nice. _Wonwoo_ was just so nice, the soft touch of his fingers, the warm and smooth sensation of his skin, the feeling of his hot breath against Mingyu’s neck or the feeling of his mouth wrapped around Mingyu’s dick — everything about him was alluring and enticing and completely addictive and Mingyu _couldn’t stop_.

He _wanted_ to touch Wonwoo, he wanted to feel him and hold him and hear the purr of his voice when it was tainted by arousal, wanted to pretend that it was something meant only for his ears and that nobody else in the entire world would ever get the pleasure to hear it the way he did.

Mingyu wanted _Wonwoo_.

He was terrified he’d accidentally expose that desire someday.

Mingyu had grown prone to headaches that usually started whenever he thought about their relationship. They were friends… Right? They were _friends._

Maybe Mingyu was falling apart.

Maybe, if he never acknowledged these emotions swimming deep within him he could keep being with Wonwoo for as long as his luck would allow.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

_Sometime after Christmas but before New Years, when they’d been laying in Mingyu’s bed, watching the end of that movie they’d interupted that time and sharing pieces of oranges, Mingyu had looked at Wonwoo’s profile and hesitated._

_“… Why don’t you get a girlfriend to do all of these things with?” He had asked seriously after having spent the foregone twenty minutes gathering the courage to voice the one question that had bothered him the most. His heart had thundered in his ears._

_Wonwoo hadn’t even torn his eyes from the final battle scene._

_“Hm? Ah…” He’d hummed distractedly. “Why should I? Girlfriends take effort and time — it’s a pain. And besides, I’ve got you right here. It’s just way more convinient like this.”_

_Mingyu didn’t know why he at the time had felt so let down by Wonwoo’s answer._

_He told himself daily not to be stupid enough to hope for anything._

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

“Uhm… Mingyu-ssi?”

Mingyu looked up from where he’d been going over his returned and marked paper to find Lee Seokmin hesitating by his desk. The bell had already rung, but Mingyu was in no hurry to leave the classroom.

When Seokmin noticed that he had Mingyu’s attention he jutted with his thumb towards the doorway.

“He, uh, asked me to tell you to hurry up.”

Mingyu followed the line of Seokmin’s thumb with his eyes until they landed on the smiling figure of Wonwoo who upon noticing Mingyu’s attention waved at him.

Mingyu frowned.

“Yeah, okay. Thanks.” He muttered and stood, throwing both his paper and notes into his bag to go over them later and walked towards the door.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

“Hey, wanna get drunk?”

That wasn’t even a proper greeting, nor was it an appropriate question to voice in the middle of the corridor where anyone, like a teacher or nosy students could overhear, and Mingyu gave Wonwoo a strange look.

“… Why?”

They were kind of blocking the way for other students who wished to leave, so Mingyu grabbed Wonwoo’s shoulder and lead them to the side where he could crowd Wonwoo against the wall and hopefully hinder anyone from listening in on their conversation.

Wonwoo laughed and nudged Mingyu’s arm with his hand.

“Why not? C’mon! It’ll be like last time! Except you have a drink too, have a little fun and let loose a little. What do you say?”

Wonwoo’s hand rested against Mingyu’s elbow and he slowly dragged it down Mingyu’s arm until he reached his hand, not grabbing it, but playing lightly with Mingyu’s fingers while watching for Mingyu’s reaction.

It was so discreet no one could see, but Mingyu’s pulse quickened anyway and his cheeks flushed lightly.

Wonwoo seemed entertained by his shyness and smirked before he leant closer to Mingyu who swallowed, his mouth suddenly feeling dry.

“Doing it will feel _much better_ than when you’re sober. Promise.” His voice was dark and smooth, implicating things that Mingyu really shouldn’t be thinking about in the middle of a corridor in their school.

Mingyu frowned and leant back from Wonwoo, shaking his head softly. “I don’t need it.”

“But the alcohol will increase your pleasure. You’ll feel more _excited!_ ”

Mingyu blinked, unfazed by Wonwoo’s persuation attempt and pressed his lips into a thin line.

“I don’t need it.” He repeated, more firmly.

He still had no desire to try alcohol, and besides, he really couldn’t imagine feeling more excited when he was with Wonwoo. He was already at his limit as it was. (Part of him hated to think that it wasn’t the same for Wonwoo.)

Mingyu remembered that they were supposed to keep their conversation hush-hush and leant back into Wonwoo’s space, lowering his voice again.

“Besides, how do _you_ even get ahold of alcoholic drinks?” He questioned and eyed Wonwoo sceptically. Until summer Wonwoo was as of still very much underage.

Wonwoo’s face lit up in a smile.

“Ah, I get them from S.coups-hyung!”

Mingyu was baffled by the completely unfamiliar name.

“… Hyung?” He repeated meekly.

“Yeah, S.coups-hyung. He’s really cool! You tell him what you’d like and he gets it for you in exchange for a favour or two – it’s super easy. He makes it a piece of cake. He’s a really great hyung!” Wonwoo told him happily.

Mingyu doubted S.coups was even a proper name, and maybe, just maybe, the excited manner in which Wonwoo spoke of him played a big part in the scepticism that started to take ahold of Mingyu.

“Did you get the Soju from him… last time?” He asked, careful to keep his voice level and unstrained.

“Yeah. I had to do a little dirty work for him to get it, but it wasn’t _that_ bad. Actually, it was kind of fun, so really, it wasn’t a big deal or anything. Like I said, he’s a chill guy.” Wonwoo shrugged, tilting his head to the side, which caused Mingyu’s eyes to flicker to his pale neck for a brief moment and lose his train of thought.

Wonwoo studied him with a soft frown.

“Are you sure you don’t want any? It really is _no trouble_ at all. I could call him right now and we could meet up with him later, and I’ll just run some errands for him another time. How about it?”

Mingyu didn’t reply to his question. His brain got caught up on something Wonwoo had said.

_He had his number._

He didn’t know why this insignificant detail left him feeling so cold. (Or why that insignificant detail felt really significant to him.)

Mingyu hadn’t met this ‘S.coups’, but he already, greatly disliked him. Hearing Wonwoo speak of someone else so fondly — Mingyu hated it.

His chest felt tight. Something unpleasant twisted and turned within his gut, something ugly Mingyu had sworn not to feel at all costs but now failed to stop from rapidly growing inside of him.

_Jealousy._

Bitterness was spreading in his mouth and Mingyu had to step back from Wonwoo. He turned his head sideways and refused to meet Wonwoo’s eyes as the despicable emotion swelled within him.

“Should I call him?” Wonwoo’s voice pulled Mingyu out of the darkness that was rapidly enveloping his heart, but his words didn’t make the fog clear in the slightest.

“There’s no need for that. I don’t want it.” Mingyu bit, and Wonwoo’s smile slipped at his suddenly clipped tone.

Mingyu hadn’t meant to sound so harsh (or maybe he had, he wasn’t sure.)

Wonwoo was giving him a look of concern and suddenly Mingyu had a desperate urge to disappear, take the dark emotions inside of him along into a plain of non-existance where they both could just cease to exist and stop acting like complete morons.

He felt lost. He didn’t know why he suddenly felt so irritated and it frustrated him, because for some reason, he was hurting, but he didn’t understand why he was in pain to begin with.

Venom began pooling in his mouth, making Mingyu feel sick, as if he had to throw up.

“Also, don’t indebt yourself to that guy anymore.” The request bubbled up from his throat without his intent and sounded more like a cruel command rather than friendly advice. Mingyu could feel the horns begin to portrude from his forhead, and he hated it, but he was clueless of what actions he needed to take to stop himself from feeling the way he was.

Wonwoo looked surprised by his odd demand.

“S.coups-hyung? Why?” He questioned.

Mingyu’s cheeks burned hot with shame. He knew he was acting irrational and selfish, the emotions raging within him making him act _possesive_ , like he in some way had some sort of proclaimed right to Wonwoo, and part of him was terrified that Wonwoo would notice and be as appalled by it as Mingyu himself felt.

Suddenly a thin, fragile sheet of ice surrounded them, and depending on what Mingyu answered, it could shatter around them like glass and cut them both full of wounds that might never heal, and it was terrifying. But it didn’t seem to matter, because the demon within Mingyu pushed for a confrontation.

“I don’t like it.” He told Wonwoo, seething inwardly as he imagined this ‘S.coups’ in his inner minds eye. “He sounds really suspicious. What kind of person sells others this sort of stuff ilegally? Someone like that is dangerous.” He went on to explain, feeling a headache come on as his emotions were all over the place.

Mingyu pressed two of his fingers against his temple and exhaled to calm down.

“Just, don’t meet up with him anymore.”

Wonwoo’s expression slowly turned into a frown.

“He’s not suspicious… S.coups-hyung is really dependable. Just because he helps others to have a little _fun_ doesn’t meen he’s a _bad person_ , even if it is illegal, or what else."

Mingyu realised Wonwoo wasn’t responding kindly to his request (reasonable, he persumed) and worried his bottomlip as he wrecked his mind for anything that he knew would change Wonwoo’s mind but coming up with nothing.

Mingyu felt like crap and he didn’t want to fight, but he didn’t want Wonwoo to hang out with S.coups anymore either. He was conflicted and didn’t know what the correct course of action was.

Finally he just looked into Wonwoo’s eyes and begged.

“Please.”

It was unusual for Mingyu to become upset, even more rare for him to be so insistent on something, and this had Wonwoo pause. Withholding his anger he searched Mingyu’s gaze and Mingyu stared back, selfconscious and worried about what Wonwoo was able to see in the depths of his eyes.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, Wonwoo released a breath Mingyu hadn’t been aware he was holding.

“… Yeah. Yeah, okay. I won’t involve myself with him anymore.” He agreed calmly.

Wonwoo’s easy compliance stunned Mingyu who blinked and stared at him in disbelief.

“… Really?” He had to double-check. Was Wonwoo really agreeing to his demand, just like that?

Why?

A small smile started to show on Wonwoo’s face, and he shrugged his shoulders.

“Yeah, really. If Mingyu doesn’t like it, I won’t do it.”

Wonwoo reached up and tucked some of Mingyu’s bangs behind one of his ears, his brief touch leaving Mingyu’s skin burning where they had made contact. Mingyu’s heart stuttered in his chest and for a moment he forgott all about breathing.

“A troubled expression doesn’t suit you.” Wonwoo said gently and gave him a lazy grin.

Mingyu wanted to ask why.

Why, why, _why._

But the single syllable lodged in his throat and he never managed to voice it, doomed to painfully swallow around it and bite his tongue as it scratched his throat on the way down again.

Wonwoo left him behind and Mingyu stared after him wile a silent storm raged inside of him.

He caught two of his classmates, Chwe Hansol and Boo Seungkwan’s eyes peeking curiously at him from where they had stopped outside of the classroom, but the duo quickly snapped their gazes away and tried and failed horribly to look inconspicous when they realised Mingyu had noticed their staring. Mingyu’s gut sank. He gripped the strap of his backpack and hurried to leave, his mind spinning wildly all the way to his home.

Why did Wonwoo make it seem as if Mingyu was entitled to these emotions? This _jealousy_ , this _possesiveness_ , this _infatuation_ — all these feelings Mingyu denied and tried to bury sixteen feet under each time they resurfaced.

At first Mingyu didn’t know wether to laugh or to cry, but once the moon had risen the latter urge won out and he curled in on himself under his blanket and tried to make himself as small as possible.

The same question kept him up all night.

_Why?_

Why did Wonwoo have to make him hopeful of something more?

 

✧ ✧ ✧

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know. Y'all caught up in Seventeen's comeback, just like I am, but there you go anyways~
> 
> Aigo. These two... Poor Mingyu. Hwaiting.
> 
> Ah, also, this is about as much as the other members of seventeen will be present in this fic, lmao. Ergo, not a lot. Except for 96-line, bc they're wonu's friends and hella lot of fun to include. But they make for cute little bonuses when they show up, don't they? Like easter eggs in games. (Hah.)
> 
> I tend to write long Author Notes (gdi EVERYTIME—!) but thank you to all of you who've already subscribed to this fic~! It's really fun and also flattering to see. I'm not really sure where this is headed towards, like I mentioned in the first chapter, I'm just going to have fun with it — but that also means that you guys can get to influence the story! (yay?) So if there's any ideas or anything specific you'd like to see them do or for to happen to them, go ahead and comment. See if it inspires me, tickles my interest, sails my ship — lol, I dunno. But I'd be happy to know what you think! Why not kudos seeing that you're here and everything.
> 
> Also, no. English is not my native language. How did you know? (Don't all of you bilingual people out there hate how you always have to point that out? smh)
> 
> Not that I think any of you regards my English as especially bad or anything, (Unless you do, in which case: TT) but just in case there's a grammar nazi out there waiting to get a piece of me or something, lmao. Fite me.
> 
> Cheers mates!


	3. The taste of you lingers, even over the coldest of nights

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mingyu feels as if he's going insane. His and Wonwoo's relationship resembles a rollercoaster ride.

✧ ✧ ✧

 

_”Mingyu...”_

Wonwoo’s eyes were burning. His skin was hot.

_”Nh... Ah—!”_

Wonwoo’s hands reached for Mingyu. His voice was like a melody, clear and strong.

Mingyu’s eyes glided down Wonwoo’s bare, flushed chest and slim frame.

Everything was hot around them.

_”Please...!”_

Mingyu hooked his fingers inside of Wonwoo and savoured the mewl that rippled from Wonwoo’s throat at his touch.

_”Please, Mingyu — touch me more...!”_

Mingyu closed his eyes ad breathed slowly as he listened to Wonwoo’s sweet voice.

Wonwoo reached for him.

_”I want to be closer... ”_

Fingers brushed Mingyu’s bangs from his face.

_“Mingyu, please…”_

Hands tangled into the hair on the back of his head and tugged.

_“… Closer.”_

Wonwoo’s voice was smooth like velvet in his ear. Hot lips ghosted over his.

Mingyu wished that this warmth wasn’t just a dream.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

Spring crept up on them slowly, gradually thawing away the snow and raising the degrees with each passing day much to everyones delight. The seasons changed, and the months melted together.

It was raining, and Mingyu was avoiding Wonwoo.

They’d been doing this for so long now it felt as if it was all Mingyu had ever known. But it wasn’t enough, and Mingyu started to want more, want to do more, things Wonwoo didn’t know about, things that haunted him in his dreams and clouded his mind whenever they were together — things you weren’t supposed to want to do with another male.

Things Wonwoo wouldn’t want to do with him.

It was too much, his desires and his emotions. Mingyu couldn’t handle it, so he avoided the problem and distanced himself from the one who seemed to be the sole cause of them. Replied less to textmessages. Pretended to be busy and ignored Wonwoo in school. Declined more invitations to Wonwoo’s place, and refused more visits to his own apartment. Made up excuses to not being able to sneak away during lunch hour, anything and everything that he could come up with.

It took time, and Mingyu wouldn’t deny it was hard to _not_ be with Wonwoo, but soon his days grew more unoccupied, and their heated escapades less frequent.

Mingyu told himself that it was okay, it would be okay. If he just got some time, he would be able to reforge himself and his emotions would subside.

He knew he was fooling himself every night when he touched himself and imagined Wonwoo in his minds eye.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

The rain drizzled lightly against the windowpanes, the subdued pitter-patter filling the desolate classroom with its’ soothing sound. The droplets left traces in their wake as they slid down the outside of the glass, and the atmosphere of the late afternoon was tranquil and filled Mingyu with a feeling of serenity.

Apart from the occasional distant sound of a group of students walking down the corridor or a teacher opening or closing another door on the same floor, the part of the school where Mingyu had taken to hiding in was still and quiet.

He’d stumbled upon this classroom one week ago when he’d been mindlessly walking around whilst avoiding Wonwoo (whom he knew would be waiting for him by his locker thanks to a heads up from Minghao) and had taken a liking to it.

It was only used for morning classes, and so it’s lack of occupants during the afternoons made it a perfect private place just for Mingyu.

Mingyu wasted time by cutting ahead on his homework, and today he was sitting with his literature assignment, flipping through the detailed instructions provided to them by their teacher and marking down important points he would do good not to forget when he got to actually reading the accompanying book that was resting beside him on the desk.

He didn’t think much of the footsteps outside in the corridor until he heard the door of the classroom slide open.

He didn’t look up from where he was sat.

”So, this is where you’ve been.”

Mingyu didn’t reply and took a silent farewell of the peace in his mind, mourning that it had to go.

Wonwoo closed the door gently behind him and walked into the room.

”I’ve been calling your phone. I spent the last thirty minutes searching for you throughout the entire school.” He stopped in front of Mingyu and pulled out the chair from the desk in front of the one Mingyu was sat at and straddled it backwards, crossing his arms over the backrest and leaning his chin against them.

Mingyu had turned his phone off, but he didn’t tell Wonwoo that.

”I didn’t realise.” He replied with an even voice, uncomfortably aware that Wonwoo was watching him very closely.

”Is ignoring me fun to you?” Wonwoo’s voice was soft, and Mingyu finally looked up from his homework to meet the other’s eyes.

”How did you even know where I was?” He didn’t answer Wonwoo’s question.

Wonwoo straightened up and leant back slightly on his chair.

”A dongsaeng of Soonyoung’s saw you here last week.” He said.  “Also, your classmate, that handsome but shy one with a huge smile, told me.”

”Ah.” Mingyu labeled Seokmin as a temporary traitor in his mind and looked back down at his assignment sheet, letting them laps into a fragile silence.

Wonwoo didn’t speak and just watched Mingyu work, eventually settling down and relaxing completely across from him as well.

The rain continued to fall outside the classroom.

Mingyu continued to take notes and work as if Wonwoo’s presence didn’t serve as a disturbance to him at all.

Minutes passed them by in silence.

Wonwoo got bored with watching Mingyu study and picked up one of his markers and began drumming an un-predetermined rhythm with it against the surface of the desk, humming a soft tune to go along with it.

Mingyu wasn’t bothered by it at first, but after another minute, Mingyu got tired of the noise and took the pen from Wonwoo’s hand and placed it flat on the desk again.

Wonwoo’s patience ran out.

”What is it Mingyu?” He questioned vehemently. “Are you angry with me? Did I do something wrong? If I did something to make you mad, I’ll apologise. Here. _I’m sorry_. Is that what you want to hear from me?”

Mingyu sighed irritably and laid down his pen.

”Why are you apologising?” He asked.

Wonwoo looked frustrated and gestured with his hands.

”I don’t know! But the mood between us has been shitty lately! I don’t understand why, but we can’t go on like this. It’s sad!” It seemed as if looking into Mingyu’s eyes made Wonwoo loose his fierce spirit and he lowered his head until his forehead rested against the surface of Mingyu’s table.

Mingyu looked down at the pitiful backside of his head.

”I don’t want to fight, Mingyu.” Wonwoo mumbled softly against the wood. ”You won’t talk to me… Why can’t you just tell me what’s wrong?”

Guilt tugged at Mingyu’s heart and he resigned himself to not let Wonwoo suffer in the unknown alone.

“I’m not mad at you.” Mingyu held back a wince at how falsely his sentence rang in the room, even to his own ears, and Wonwo gave him a rightfully sceptical look.

“So stop avoiding me.”

Mingyu averted his gaze, ironically avoiding meeting Wonwoo’s eyes by doing so and also getting them nowhere.

“I’m not avoiding you because I’m mad…” Mingyu searched for words that could explain his reasons without exposing his feelings, but he was grasping at straws and coming up with nothing eligable.

“So, there’s another reason?”

Mingyu sighed.

“Yeah. Yeah, there’s a reason. I just—”

“Was it something I did?” Wonwoo cut him off.

“ _No._ ” Mingyu dragged a hand through his hair and sighed again in frustration.

He didn’t know where to start, how to explain, or even what to _say_ , and it was draining.

He’d been struggling alone for so long, with all of his worries, all of his concerns, all of his thoughts, all of these questions he didn’t have the answer to and all of these emotions he didn’t understand. Mingyu was tired. Tired of feeling like this, tired of losing sleep because of this, tired of avoiding Wonwoo and tired of longing for him even as he was sat straight across from him.

It wasn’t fair.

He sank down onto the desk and crowded his head in his arms, feeling emotionally exhausted.

Wonwoo looked uncertain, as if he was debating weather or not it was okay to reach out and pat Mingyu’s head in a soothing manner, but ultimately ended up deciding against it and just watched him in uneasy silence.

Mingyu closed his eyes, feeling defeated and dejected for reasons he was unable to identify.

All of the insecurities that had built up inside of him over the past couple of months were suddenly overflowing and overwhelming him and his chest felt tight, his heart ached and he found it diffcult to breathe.

Mingyu just wanted it to stop.

Finally he opened his mouth.

“Do normal friends do this…?” He sounded so small and lost, his voice expressing all of the things he was feeling at the moment. Weak. Pathetic. _Terrified._

This question had been weighing on him for a long time, and Wonwoo looked at Mingyu after he had finally voiced it, a small frown dressing his face after a moment.

“Do what exactly? You’ll have to be a little more specific, Mingyu.”

Wonwoo’s untimely density made Mingyu irritated and he raised his head to look at the other, not believing he would have to spell it out to him.

“Touch each other, Wonwoo! Touch each other’s dicks!” He hissed between his teeth, feeling his cheeks flame up in anger.

Wonwoo looked at him with attentive eyes.

“… Is that what this is about?”

Mingyu’s heart was beating furiously against his ribcage and he pressed his lips together.

“Answer me.” He grit out.

Wonwoo looked between Mingyu’s eyes before he worried his bottom lip and tilted his head downwards, suddenly acting passive and finding his own fingers very interesting. He glanced up at Mingyu from under his eyelashes, meeting his gaze a little shyly after a short silence had passed.

“… They don’t,” He admitted. “But can’t we do it anyway?” He asked.

Mingyu felt his frustration flare up.

He didn’t know what he had wanted Wonwoo to say, but that hadn’t been it.

“We can’t! Or, we shouldn’t, it’s not —!” He couldn’t gather his thoughts. “ _Normal_ friends don’t do that sort of thing, do you get it?” Mingyu wasn’t sure if he was trying to tell Wonwoo this or himself.

Wonwoo frowned in response to his raised voice.

A small, frightened part of Mingyu wondered if this conversation would serve to create a rift between them. (If one didn’t already exist.)

“Yeah, I get that part, but it feels good. I like it.”

Mingyu looked at Wonwoo.

“… You like touching dicks?” He clarified incredolously, feeling like he hadn’t understood Wonwoo correctly.

Wonwoo choked on air and began coughing violently. (Had it not been a pretty serious conversation, Mingyu would’ve found it funny.)

“ _What —_ No!” He hurried to protest. “No, not like that! I don’t like touching _dick!_ ” Wonwoo’s cheeks burned bright red after he realised what it had sounded like when he’d phrased himself in that way. “I just — Well, I mean —” Now it was Wonwoo’s turn to feel flustered and fruitlessly search for the right words and Mingyu let him take his time.

Feeling utterly embarrassed Wonwoo gave up trying to save face and simply covered his with both of his hands, shielding himself from Mingyu’s gaze.

“What I’m trying to say is that I don’t mind if it’s you.” He mumbled into his hands, even his ears glowing bright red. “Doing these things. With you. I don’t _hate_ it. It’s fun.”

Mingyu simply stared at him.

He was afraid, terrified even, that he would misinterpret the meaning of Wonwoo’s words and twist it around in his head into something it wasn’t. His heart was already beating like crazy, and he had to tell himself not to get too excited or to get his hopes up in advance.

He thought avoiding Wonwoo would’ve made his emotions cool, but he’d been wrong. A fire was raging through him now, and it was stronger, and hotter than the flames Mingyu had felt whenever he was around Wonwoo before. It was engulfing him, swallowing him up and chewing him down and he was helpless to stop it.

He swallowed and tried to meet Wonwoo’s gaze through his fingers, feeling heat spread onto his own cheeks as well as the temperature of the room around them seemed to slowly rise.

 _Don’t get your hopes up. Don’t you dare get your hopes up,_ Mingyu told himself within his head, determined not to get hurt.

But Wonwoo had just admitted that he wanted to do this. He’d said that he didn’t hate it, being with Mingyu in that way. How could his heart not swell with hope of all the potential possibilities that entailed?

_No. He said that he didn’t mind. Don’t do this. Don’t decieve yourself just to end up dissapointed at the end of the day. Does he even know how open to interpretation his words are? Is he aware that he’s leading you on? Is it on purpose?_

Feeling conflicted by the two forces within him Mingyu tried to calm his racing heart and allowed a bittersweet smile tug at his lips.

“… Do you even get what you’re saying? Guys don’t usually do this.” He explained softly, too afraid to take Wonwoo’s words for what they were and wary of what was to come.

Wonwoo lowered his hands and gave Mingyu a half-hearted glare.

“I _get it_ already.” He assured, and then went ahead to ask “What about you?”

Mingyu’s heart stopped in his chest.

“W-what about me?” He stammered, feeling the tingle of nervousity spread thoroughout his body.

Wonwoo looked at him with hesitation.

“Do you… _not_ want to?”

Mingyu felt his face flush.

“I, uh… I _want_ to, but, uhm…”

“You want to, but…?” Wonwoo pressed.

Mingyu couldn’t stand looking into Wonwoo’s eyes so he studied the outline of the classroom’s plain and highly interesting walls while his brain scrambled for words that would make sense. He squirmed a bit in his chair, feeling uncomfortable and anxious as he came to the conclusion that now would be the best time for him to voice his desires, otherwise he might never get to, and since they’d already gotten this far and was talking this openly with one another it seemed like a shame to pass the unexpected but not unwelcomed opportunity up.

Carefully, Mingyu glanced back at Wonwoo who’d been watching him the entire time. He couldn’t believe he was about to admit this…

“I want to do other things as well.” He said, his voice not as shaky as he had expected it to be. “Like, _more_ … than what we’ve done. Things that… people… who’re in a relationship… usually do…” Mingyu felt as if he was burning up. Maybe if he embarrassed himself enough he could evaporate and disappear. Now would be a splendid moment for that.

Wonwoo looked surprisingly calm after his confession-of-sorts, giving Mingyu just a mildly contemplative look.

“… Well, I’m not entirely sure we’re on the same page, but… Mingyu, if there are things you want to try out, it’s okay for you to ask me about it. I won’t reject you or turn you down without hearing you out first, and if it sounds fun, I probably won’t oppose to it.” After shrugging softly, Wonwoo looked at Mingyu, catching his gaze and holding it with his own, and Mingyu was able to spot something warm and tender within Wonwoo’s dark orbs that had his breath hitch and his heart scramble to keep up with his overwhelming emotions.

Mingyu couldn’t really explain it, but looking into Wonwoo’s eyes, he felt as if everything around them ceased to exist, and the world and the universe and every living thing that had ever come into existance in that moment belonged to them. It was strange, like an out-of-body out-of-mind experience, and the only thing Mingyu could see was the tilt of Wonwoo’s head and the way his bangs shifted over his face as he looked at him.

“Just, don’t ignore me anymore, okay? Don’t avoid me.” Wonwoo asked of him, taking one of Mingyu’s hands between his own. “If something is on your mind, just talk to me. I promise I’ll listen, okay?”

Returning to himself Mingyu kind of got the idea that Wonwoo wasn’t really aware of what Mingyu was asking for, but they were in such a good place right now he decided that it was okay. For now, it was okay. They weren’t fighting anymore and Wonwoo was blowing Mingyu’s fears out of the water by meeting him halfway, and maybe that hope within Mingyu’s chest wasn’t such a bad thing after all. Maybe, things really had a chance of turning out for the better between them.

How Mingyu wanted to believe that.

Feeling almost dizzy, Mingyu carefully inhaled and exhaled with a tremble as all the tension that had built inside of his body slowly dissipated. He tried his facial muscles and gave Wonwoo a weak smile.

“Yeah. Yeah, okay.” He breathed and Wonwoo returned his smile with one of his own, squeezing Mingyu’s hand once more before releasing it and scratching the side of his nose while shooting Mingyu a bashfull look.

“Sorry…” He apologized with a shy smile. “I’ve never dated a girl, so I don’t have much knowledge when it comes to this sort of stuff.” He explained.

This piece of information actually surprised Mingyu slightly and he blinked owlishly. They’d never officialy talked about it, and while Mingyu was aware that Wonwoo hadn’t gone out with anyone for the entirety of the time that they’d known each other, he’d always assumed that Wonwoo had at least dated one or two girls previously, like in junior high or middle school, considering he was a very outgoing and outspoken person. (And also considering he was, from what Mingyu could recall, a pretty good kisser.) Apparently, he’d been mistaken.

But it was too early for that information to make Mingyu happy. He had to clarify something first.

Looking seriously at Wonwoo, Mingyu prepared himself for whatever the answer may be.

“… With a boy?” He asked, as Wonwoo had very specifically said ‘a girl’, although he already kind of suspected the other had simply misspoken again. But he had to ask, just to be sure. (It was Wonwoo after all. With him it was hard to tell at times.)

To Mingyu’s relief, Wonwoo’s face flushed again and he slputtered in his chair.

“Definitely not!” He exclaimed fiercly and just for that Mingyu decided to tease him further.

“… Then, _boys_?” He asked, feigning seriousness as he made it plural, and Mingyu actually laughed when Wonwoo leant across the desk to pinch his nose. Mingyu swatted his hand away and Wonwoo retreated with his cheeks flushed adorably.

“Will you stop now?” He looked properly embarrassed even as he gave Mingyu a halfhearted glare, so Mingyu was mostly pleased.

“… Not until you say that you’re not currently dating anyone.” He persisted stubbornly, feeling giddy and childish, and Wonwoo looked for a moment as if he wanted to be anywhere but there, but he still caved under Mingyu’s intense stare.

“I’m not currently going out with anyone.” He hissed, blush still dark on his cheeks. “Does hearing that make you happy? What kind of friend are you? Is this how it’s going to be now? Maybe it was better when you were avoiding me.” He added, eyeing Mingyu’s joyous expression suspiciously.

“Fine.” Mingyu said with a grin and stopped pestering him.

“Things are good between us again, right?” Wonwoo pointlessly asked after a while, giving Mingyu’s shin a small nudge underneath the table that made Mingyu look up from his assignment again. Mingyu returned the gesture, nudging Wonwoo’s knees with his.

“Yeah.” He agreed gently, his heart swelling as they shared a smile.

Things were good between them again, for now.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

Wonwoo waited for Mingyu to pack his things up by the classroom door so that they could leave together, watching him stuff his books and papers into his backpack and sling it over his back before walking up to him. Wonwoo looked at him once he stopped beside him and Mingyu looked back. They shared a tranquil moment.

Finally, Wonwoo gave him a smile and Mingyu could hear his own pulse within his ears.

“You know, if I ever were to go out with someone,” Wonwoo started and Mingyu held onto Wonwoo’s every word while holding his breath, unsure wether he was supposed to be preparing himself for heartbreak or something else entirely but equally as frightening.

“I think I’d want it to be with someone like Mingyu.” Wonwoo finished, smiling at him for another second before he slid the door open for the two of them and walked out, leaving Mingyu frozen on the spot just by the doorframe.

He wasn’t breathing. His entire body was shaking.

Mingyu covered his burning face with his hand and tried to gather his emotions again.

Unfair.

Raising his head, Mingyu bit his lip before he followed Wonwoo out and slid the door shut behind them.

Telling him something like that had been really unfair.

Outside, the rain had stopped falling.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

“It’s really pouring!”

“It is.” Mingyu agreed, standing beside Wonwoo under the roof of the school building, necks craned backwards as they watched the dark clouds causing the hefty downpour looming ominously in the sky above them a week and a half after their reconcilement.

Wonwoo clicked his tongue, looking unhappy.

“Do you think it’ll ever stop?” He asked after another two minutes had passed and the heavy rain didn’t appear to have eased up in the least.

Students that had been clever enough to check the weather forecast and brought their own umbrellas passed the two by occasionally, and Mingyu watched the reatreating forms of their coloured bubbles as they disappeared over the school courtyard.

“No. Never.” He replied evenly, watching a car that passed by in front of the school gate create a wave of water that crashed over the sidewalk. “It’ll contiune forever and Korea will go down in the history books as the country that disappeared in a tragic flood caused by skyfall.”

His sarcasm earned him a sharp elbow between the ribs and Wonwoo didn’t look the least apolegetic when Mingyu shot him a glare.

“Hardy, har. Unless you’ve got an umbrella stuck up that ass of yours, that means both of us are stuck here until it lets up.” Wonwoo said and Mingyu frowned at the reminder.

They remained there, side by side, watching the rain in silence for another two minutes or so.

“Wanna go to the art-room?” Wonwoo suggested slyly, glancing up at Mingyu from underneath his bangs.

“Nah.” Mingyu didn’t have to look at Wonwoo to see his dejected pout.

“I figured you’d say that.” He sighed. “Urgh, this is utterly boring! I want to go home!” He shouted out loud to no one in particular.

Mingyu remained silent, busy watchig another student leave safely under their umbrella.

“I don’t want to stand here in this miserable weather for hours and catch a cold! I refuse! There’s gotta be something we can do!”

“You could run.” Mingyu suggested, entertaining the idea in his mind. Wonwoo looked at him as if he’d lost his head.

“Are you an idiot? I wouldn’t even make it halfway home before I’d be on the ground with a 38 degree fever.” Mingyu shrugged. He supposed Wonwoo wasn’t wrong, but imagining it had been fun.

Wonwoo sighed again, and his depressive manners were starting to annoy Mingyu.

“Ugh, this is so boring…! I want to do something fun. And Mingyu won’t play with me…” Wonwoo whined and Mingyu rolled his eyes at his childish antics. Wonwoo dramatically clung to a pilar. “Isn’t there anything we could possibly do that would be more fun than just standing around like this?”

Mingyu watched the rain above them and a thought come to his mind.

“What about kissing?” He suggested, all the cliché romantic movies he never really fancied where the main characters declared their love for each other and then kissed in the rain while dramatic background music played to lure the viewers into getting emotional coming to his mind. The idea of him and Wonwoo reenacting such a scene was laughable.

Wonwoo and Mingyu had kissed once, on the night of Wonwoo’s intoxication, the first time they ever did anything, but they had never kissed each other since. It was as if they’d made a silent agreement that it was a line that they were not supposed to cross, even though now that Mingyu thought about it it made little to no sense as they had done more intimate things with one another since then. Kissing now wouldn’t be that much of a big deal would it?

It took Mingyu a while to notice that Wonwoo hand’t replied to him yet, and when he turned his head to look at his friend he found Wonwoo staring back at him with a strange look in his eyes, his mouth partly open and his entire face flushed in a deep crimson colour. Wonwoo’s reaction took Mingyu by surprise.

“Erh…” He coughed, and the small noise managed to pull Wonwoo from whatever stage of shock he had entered and the other quickly jumped to life and began to furiously shake his head from side to side.

“U-uh — N-no way! No way! That’s impossible!” He insistently refused and Mingyu couldn’t stop himself from laughing at how flustered Wonwoo had gotten.

“Why are you so embarrassed?” Mingyu wondered curiously, looking on in amusement as even the tips of Wonwoo’s ears were turning pink, finding it almost as endearing as he found it hilarious.

Wonwoo pressed his lips together. There was no way Mingyu couldn’t _not_ tease him when he wore an expression like that.

“This guy has even done _this and that_ , and even agreed to do _other sorts of things_ … _more_ things, and yet, he’s this flustered by the idea of a simple kiss…?” He taunted, leaning over Wonwoo with a smirk and pressing his lips together to withhold another laugh as Wonwoo’s blush darkened further at his commentary.

“That — That’s different! This and that are two completely different things!” Wonwoo defended himself. Mingyu didn’t understand how it was any different, and he didn’t understand why Wonwoo was reacting the way he was to the suggestion.

A silence settled around them.

Looking at Wonwoo, Mingyu traced his eyes along the shape of his face. From the slanted tilt of his dark but brilliant eyes, the soft curve of his nose and the sharp, pronnounced cut of his jawline, to the smooth steep of his attractively flushed cheekbones and the plump swell of his slightly parted lips, looking soft and incredibly inviting.

Mingyu blinked. He realised his heart was beating fast and hard against his ribcage and his pulse was roaring in his ears. His own face felt warm and heated and apparently he’d been so entranced by Wonwoo’s face that he’d forgotten to breathe in the meantime, and now he was feeling almost faint.

A fire was flickering within him, and with a thrill of his heart Mingyu realised that he really, really, _really_ _wanted_ to kiss Wonwoo.

Mingyu quickly glanced around them. He could do it. Most of the students had already left, and there was no one around at the moment that would catch them. If he did it now, no one would ever know except for them.

“Let me do it.” He said, looking seriously at Wonwoo who’d forgotten about their conversation in the meantime.

Wonwoo looked quizically at him.

“Huh?” He asked, confused. “Do what?”

“Let me kiss you.” Mingyu said and watched Wonwoo inhale sharply, quickly leaning away from him and stepping backwards, his face immidiatedly flushing once more.

“No way! That’s impossible.” He repeated, holding his hands out as if to stop Mingyu just in case he attacked him. “I told you! That kind of thing is too embarrassing!”

“It’s not impossible.” Mingyu countered, stepping closer to Wonwoo who stilled and looked up at him to meet his gaze, his eyes gleaming with wary anticipation and something like fear — which was silly, again, considering the level of intimacy they were used to.

But still, staring into Wonwoo’s eyes while standing so close to one another was intimate in an entirely different way compared to when they were blind with lust and overrun by desire and rutting against each other like wild animals, Mingyu realised. This… was sentimental. Tender. Elevating. Scary.

Mingyu wondered if a high school kid could die from a heart attack.

“W-what? Are you going to do it?” Wonwoo attempted to sound unbothered, defiantly meeting Mingyu’s gaze in a challange, but Mingyu didn’t miss the nervous shifting of his feet or the slight tremor in his voice, which also sounded slightly breathless. Neither did he miss the hitch in Wonwoo’s breath when he stepped even closer to him so as their chests were almost pressing together, placing one of his hands behind the other’s neck so that he could tilt his head slightly upwards and look at him.

Mingyu realised Wonwoo wasn’t breathing either.

“Yeah.” He mumbled in response before he leant down and captured his lips.

They were as soft as Mingyu remembered. Actually, maybe even more so now that they weren’t as chapped by cheap alcohol. They definitely tasted sweeter than he remembered.

It lasted only for a second, and they were both flustered when they parted. They stared at each other for another second, and then Mingyu leant back down a second time and Wonwoo tilted his head to the side to grant Mingyu more access and softly kissed him back.

They moved their lips together slowly, gently, carefully, experimentally, as if to get a feel of each other’s lips and a taste of each other’s tongues before they went any further. But they wouldn’t do that today, and after another five seconds, Mingyu leaned back and stepped away from Wonwoo to give them both some well-needed space.

Neither of them could hear the sound of the rain anymore, and both of them felt as if their chests were about to cumbust, cheeks burning and eyes glossy as they took a moment to return to their bodies from the plain of sensations.

Mingyu was the one that found his bearings first.

“I’m gonna head home.” He announced, amazed that his voice wasn’t shaking as much his hands were trembling.

Wonwoo immidiatedly snapped out of his dazed state, his eyes widening comically as Mingyu put some distance between them.

“Eh? What? Why?!” His expression mirrored his shock.

“What do you mean ‘why’? You were the one who said this was too embarrassing – now you’re going to complain?” Mingyu gave Wonwoo a look and the other just stared dumbly at Mingyu, his mouth opening and closing in mute protest.

The rain hadn’t let up, but Mingyu couldn’t stay any longer lest his heart actually gave out on him from overheating its motor.

He shot Wonwoo a small smile over his shoulder.

“Just stay here and contemplate the feeling of my lips.” He said, to which Wonwoo sputtered.

“T-that’s weird!” he exclaimed with burning cheeks, but Mingyu had already turned around and dashed out into the rain.

“Mingyu!” Wonwoo shouted after him, his eyes following his friends figure as he disappeared amongst the raindrops without giving a reply.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

The pounding on Mingyu’s door was louder but not much more painful than the pounding in his head, and Mingyu turned under his duvet, groaning as every muscle in his body ached and protested as he stuck his head out from under the cover. He wanted to shout to whoever was outside to go away, or at least ask them what they wanted, but he soon realised he had way too little energy to do either of those things and that he was doomed to wait it out, even as it made his headache so much worse.

“Mingyu! I know you’re in there! If you can hear me, at least come open the door!”

Mingyu groaned again. Of course.

He considered using the last of his powers to get up and crawl to the door to let Wonwoo inside his apartment, but Mingyu ultimately decided against it and retreated back under his covers, hoping that if he ignored him long enough, hopefully Wonwoo would just go away.

The eccessive knocking continued, but after a while it was almost as if it matched up with the pounding already in Mingyu’s head, so it gratefully became a lot easier to ignore.

“Mingyu, come on! You’re aware that I’m not leaving until I get inside right? Mingyu! Open the door! Mingyu!”

The shouting was a lot harder to ignore, but Mingyu pressed his pillows over his head, and after what seemed like an eternity (but perhaps had been something closer to around six minutues) Wonwoo finally went away, and silence settled inside his small apartment again.

Exhausted, but satisfied, Mingyu was ready to fall back asleep.

It was only a couple of minutes later that he was roused by the sharp jingle of keys inserting into his lock and turning, and then his door swung open with a slam and Wonwoo entered his apartment in a storm.

“I was knocking and calling for you really loudly! You could’ve at least answered me!” He spoke loudly, and Mingyu winced at the volume of his voice, realising with disapointment that he wouldn’t get to go back to sleep after all.

He listened to Wonwoo kick his shoes off and the unmistakeable crinkle of a plastic bag as it was put down on the floor. Mingyu stuck his head out from under the duvet just as Wonwoo was unzipping his jacket and putting it on Mingyu’s hangar before he swirled around and headed straight for Mingyu’s bed, bringing the mysterious bag with him as he went.

“What kind of hospitality is this? After I came all this way to see you too!” Wonwoo complained, but it appeared as if he didn’t expect any response.

The matress bounced when he sat down on the bed and Mingyu bit his tongue to not wince out loud at the sudden movement. He heaved a sigh and forced his sticky bangs out of his eyes as he peeked at Wonwoo who busied himself with unpacking the bags contents from under his cover.

“... How did you get inside?” He asked and Wonwoo looked at him.

“I went to the landlord and asked for the extra key. She totally believed me when I told her I was your lover.”

Mingyu wanted to smack himself across the face, and he would have, if he’d had the energy for it and hadn’t suspected that it would’ve only made his killing headache even worse.

He decided to go for a safer topic.

“Why did you come?” He felt like he was dying, and quite frankly, Wonwoo wasn’t making things better for him.

He whined loudly when Wonwoo climbered on top of him and a small struggle ensued between them before Wonwoo finally tore the duvet away to uncover Mingyu’s face and upper body and subject it to the chill of the room.

“ _Why are you torturing me?_ ” Mingyu wanted to know with a raspy voice, realising that his throat hurt as well as his entire body.

“See, I knew it!” Wonwoo declared upon getting a proper look at Mingyu’s blotchy face, releasing the duvet onto Mingyu’s trembling form again and climbing off of him. Mingyu watched him in confusion as he pulled some sort of box out of the plastic bag and inspected its backside.

“The one who said idiots don’t get sick was dead wrong…” Mingyu caught Wonwoo muttering to himself as he headed to the side of the room where Mingyu’s tiny kitchen was located and grabbed a glas from his cupboard and filled it with water before he returned to Mingyu’s bedside. He took a sheet out from the small box and Mingyu realised it was pills as Wonwoo popped two of them into his palm. He then shoved both the glas of water and the pills in Mingyu’s face.

“You’re sick, and I’m here to take care of you. Swallow these.” He said and Mingyu had no reason to argue with him, so he gingerly took the glas and the pills and popped them into his mouth, shuddering as the cool liquid poured down his throat and he swallowed the medicine.

Once he was done he handed the glas back to Wonwoo who immidiatedly went to refill it and placed it on the floor beside Mingyu’s bed when he returned.

“How’d... you know?” Mingyu was suddenly freezing, but at the same time he was sweating, and it was really just an unpleasant feeling to be sick and he shuddered as he wrapped his blanket tighter around himself.

Wonwoo shot him an unimpressed look.

“Gee, running out into the rain like that, I wonder how you got sick.” He drawled sarcastically and Mingyu guessed he was right, but he didn’t have to be a jerk about it.

Wonwoo’s hand was warm and heavy against his forehead, startling Mingyu when it settled there. Wonwoo’s eyes were softer now as he looked at Mingyu with something very close to affection.

“You’re a moron, do you know that?” He mumbled softly and Mingyu blinked up at him.

“Maybe.” He croaked, and was happy when it managed to put a smile on Wonwoo’s face.

“Alright, enough sentimentality. I brought chicken soup that I can heat on the stove for you when you feel hungry, as well as some ginger snacks and throat lezonges — you know, a little of whatever that’ll help you feel better in no time! Is there anything specific that you’d like to do?” Wonwoo looked to him and Mingyu was honestly impressed with his deidcation. If only Wonwoo was always this lenient. Hah. “I want to help out, so just tell me whatever it is that you want. I’ll do it!”

“... I want to sleep.” Mingyu coughed, worried for a moment that Wonwoo would be disappointed that it wasn’t anything he could help him with. But Wonwoo looked completely unfazed by his request and nodded his head.

“Alright. Don’t worry about me, I’ll entertain myself in the meantime.” Mingyu was relieved to hear this. That meant he could sleep easily without wondering if Wonwoo was bored or not.

“Is it okay if I use your laptop?” Wonwoo asked and Mingyu managed to nod, feeling his drowziness already pull at his eyelids. He listened to the tiny noises of Wonwoo moving around in his livinspace and lulled off to the background soundtrack to whatever movie Wonwoo played.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

When Mingyu woke up he felt groggy and crappy, but his head didn’t hurt as bad as it had in the morning.

Wonwoo was playing a video game, but paused it to offer to heat up the soup for Mingyu. Mingyu was hungry, so he agreed, and once the food was done they shared it together in companionable silence, Mingyu watching Wonwoo struggle and then succeed through the different levels of the game whilst keeping most of his tricks and tips to himself just to get to watch Wonwoo become frustrated.

When they were done, Wonwoo took care of the dishes and when Mingyu voiced that he felt sticky and uncomfortable in his sweaty clothes, Wonwoo ran him a bath and picked out fresh clothes for him in the meantime.

They spent the rest of the afternoon reading comic books and messing around, finally watching a movie while Mingyu snacked on the dried ginger bits Wonwoo had brought him and felt improvingly better with Wonwoo’s shoulder pressed against his as they sat with their backs against his bed with the laptop in Mingyu’s lap and his blanket wrapped around them.

When Mingyu felt tired again, Wonwoo helped him back into the bed with his duvet and acted ridicolously like a mom while tucking him in, which resulted in laughter from both of them. He then left Mingyu alone so that he could once again fall asleep undisturbed and hopefully wake up completely recovered the next day.

In the dark, Mingyu remembers feeling Wonwoo climb over him and settle down behind him on the bed, the matress shifting and a warm hand treading through his hair, caressing it gently. A soft voice sounding by his ear, whispering,

“Sleep tight, Mingyu.”

 

✧ ✧ ✧

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo~ That wasn't an awefully long wait, now was it? *laughs*
> 
> This chapter was supposed to be longer, but in the end I changed my mind and cut it off earlier than originally planned because I felt like too many things were happening at once. Speaking of too many things, is this chapter a mess? They get to talk but not in depth, not really. Are you surprised by Wonwoo? Everyone is finding him as an asshole (I'm sort of enjoying that tbh hue hue) but he still cares about Mingyu — like it hopefully comes across in this chapter. But you can still argue that he's leading Mingyu on... smh. Wonwoo's... not bright in this story lmao.
> 
> ALSO, KISSING!!!  
> They're sort of doing these things a little backwards, but who cares. Was it cute? They're cute, right?
> 
> Sigh, meanwhile their comeback is still killing me softly. Wonwoo is just so happy and that makes me happy.
> 
> Next chapter will probably be up soon as well! If you're enjoying the story, please don't hesitate to leave comments or kudos to tell me about it~ 
> 
> Later!


	4. And when I look over my shoulder, you're no longer there

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mingyu is still conflicted. Everything remains the same.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

Mingyu awoke to a dull buzzing. Half-asleep and groggy he grunted as he untagled from the cage of Wonwoo’s limbs haphazardly laid across him and after some groping managed to wrap his fingers around the vibrating device, sliding his finger across the screen and pulling it to his ear without thinking much about it.

“…at?” His voice was grovely from sleep, but at least his throat felt less like jarred metal, Mingyu noted dully.

“ _… Hello? Mingyu-ssi?”_ The voice he recognised as Junhui after a couple of seconds sounded hesitant over the phone, and only then did Mingyu realise that it had been Wonwoo’s phone that had gone off.

Feeling his head clear some of the sleep-fog from his mind, Mingyu blinked awake and sat up slightly in his bed, keeping his duvet wrapped tightly around himself with his free hand as its warmth made him feel safe and comfortable. He noted that his muscles didn’t ache as much and his limbs felt less heavy than they had the previous day. His head didn’t hurt as bad either, even as it worked somewhat slower than usual.

He glanced at the still-asleep figure beside him and recalled that Wonwoo had taken care of him yesterday. He distracted himself from the tug in his chest by focusing his attention on Wonwoo’s classmate on the other end of the line again.

“Uh… Yeah… What’s up?” It took longer for his brain to conjure words than normally, but other than that Mingyu would say he felt okay.

 _“So he was at your place after all.”_ The blonde on the other end of the line only sounded partly exhasperated, as if he’d suspected that to be the case all along. _“Anyway, wake Wonnie-ya for me and tell him to get his ass to school. We’ve got a test today that he can’t afford to miss. If he leaves now he’ll still make it, yeah?”_

Mingyu chanced a peek at the numbers on the device. 07.58 it read. He put the phone back to his ear.

“Yeah, alright. I’ll throw him out.” He said and Junhui made a content hum.

 _“Great! Thank you kindly, Mingyu-ssi~! Ya, Soonyoung-ah, you owe Jihoon 1000_ _₩_ _—”_

 _“What?! Damn it! Why are you_ always _right about these sort of—”_

_“It’s Wonwoo. Now shut up and pay me.”_

Mingyu pretended not to hear the last bit of conversation between Wonwoo’s three companions before Junhui swiftly ended the call.

Turning on the matress so that he was facing Wonwoo, Mingyu took the phone and let it fall from his hand and hit the other across the face, causing Wonwoo to immidiatedly stir from his sleep.

“Wha…?” There was a small line of drool in one corner of Wonwoo’s mouth, and had it been anyone else, Mingyu would’ve been able to convince himself that it was disgusting.

Wonwoo gazed up at him in slight confusion.

“You’re gonna miss your test.” Mingyu told him, and Wonwoo frowned, looking solemn as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes with a fist.

“Why can’t you wake me with a sweet ‘good morning’ like normal people?” He complained, appearing putout.

Even so, he was dressed and washed up five minutes later, pulling his jacket over his shoulders whilst Mingyu sat in a cocoon of his duvet and watched him tiredly from his bed, secretly happy that he wasn’t the one that had to get up.

“Alright, I’m gonna go.” He turned back around and adressed Mingyu.

“’Kay.” Was the most Mingyu felt like offering. 

Wonwoo paused momentarily and let his eyes linger on Mingyu’s apparence, his dark, toussled bed-hair that stuck out in strange directions atop his head, his droopy, tired eyes, and his slightly swollen cheeks that still held a small flush from the fever from the previous day.

Mingyu eyed Wonwoo strangely when he suddenly decided to walk back up to his bed and stop in front of him. When Mingyu tilted his head back to peek at Wonwoo’s expression, a hand touched his cheek and before he realised, Wonwoo’s face was only inches from his and another pair of lips were on his own.

Wonwoo was smiling, almost childishly gleeful, when he pulled back and got to behold Mingyu’s baffled expression. Mingyu could only blink, his brain slow to catch up with Wonwoo’s actions, and Wonwoo had already turned away and was almost by the door before Mingyu managed to find his voice again.

“… Wha… Why’d you do that?” He refused to acknowledge that his entire face was burning and tried to make his voice sound as indifferent and unaffected as he possibly could. (He had no idea if he succeeded.)

“Oh, hush. You looked cute. I couldn’t help myself.” Wonwoo sent him a cheeky grin as he opened the door and Mingyu pressed his lips together as if by doing so he could keep his heart from bursting out of his chest.

“You’ll get sick.” He called.

“Nah. I think if that was the case, I wouldn’t be up and about after sleeping with you. Text me if you’re feeling better tonight! Oh, good morning Ms. Su!” Wonwoo chirped as he turned around and spotted the middleaged lady a couple of doors down and closed the door behind himself.

Mingyu hid his face in his hands and willed away his blush before he lay down and pulled his cover over his head, already dreading the strange looks he would receive the next time he encountered his landlady.

Three minutes later, his phone buzzed. Mingyu pulled it forth from underneath his pillow and checked the notification of a message from Wonwoo. He reluctantly unlocked the phone and opened the Kakao Talk application.

 

**JWonWoo**

<( Your landlady totally thinks we’re an item, ㅋㅋㅋ  ˆ ˆ )  
RECEIVED 08.10

Mingyu typed a reply with angry fingers and then shoved his phone back underneath his pillow and turned away.

 

**JWonWoo**

<( Your landlady totally thinks we’re an item, ㅋㅋㅋ  ˆ ˆ )  
RECEIVED 08.10

( ㅠㅠ )>  
SENT 08.11

Still feeling the lingering sensation of Wonwoo’s kiss on his lips, Mingyu buried his face in his pillow and really did feel like crying.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

**JWonWoo**

<( Jihoon saw you in school!! Why didn’t you text me!!! >ㅁ<* )  
RECEIVED 09.09

<( P.S I’m glad you’re feeling better~!!! ♡ ♡ ♡ )  
RECEIVED 09.09

<( Come to the art-room )  
RECEIVED 11.42

Glancing down at the screen of his phone, Mingyu read the numbers at the top of the screen. It was already 12.08 after he had reluctantly made his way to the forgotten clubroom on the third floor of the school building, deliberatedly taking his sweet time as he debated with himself weather to keep ignoring Wonwoo’s texts or actually go to the place he was asking him to. In the end it had been Mingyu’s curiosity that had won him over and now he stood hesitating in front of the door.

Wonwoo’s last message was the only one removed of emoticons or eccessive use of exclamation points, and maybe, even as he was standing there, Mingyu was trying to ignore the rapid beat of his heart, which had started racing as soon as he’d received it twelve minutes after lunch-hour had started.

Tossing his phone into his backpack, Mingyu slid the door open and stepped inside.

The first thing he noticed was that since the last time he’d been there, the art-clubmembers had disposed of some of the old clay sculptures that had littered the desks and replaced them with designs and painted prototypes of their own as well as left colurful sheets of paper strewn across the teacher’s desk and on the floor surrounding it.

The second thing Mingyu noticed was Wonwoo, who was perched on one of the desks, turned away from Mingyu, looking out the window and watching over the ever flourishing schoolyard that had begun to take on the bright, excellent colours of spring as the rain was finally being exchanged for very longed after sunlight.

It was a strangely serene image, and Mingyu could’ve done with observing it for a while longer, but Wonwoo heard the sound of the door when it shut behind Mingyu and turned towards him.

“… Hey.” Mingyu greeted softly, carefully remaining by the clubroom’s entrance.

Wonwoo disregarded to greet him and got off the desk, striding across the room towards Mingyu with decided steps, momentarily making Mingyu worry that he had in some way made Wonwoo angry for ignoring him.

His heart jumped in his chest as he prepared for some sort of confrontation, but when Wonwoo reached him he wasn’t greeted by fury or accusations. Instead Wonwoo’s warm hands came up to cup his face and pull Mingyu forwards to meet him in a mind-numbing, searingly hot, and completely and utterly breathstealing kiss. Instantly, Mingyu’s hands flew up to grip onto the sides of Wonwoo’s uniform jacket, clutching the stiff fabric in his fists as to steady himself as he responded to the preassure of Wonwoo’s lips. Wonwoo’s hands came down to clutch at the front of Mingyu’s jacket instead.

Mingyu’s head was spinning and his chaotic thoughts grew foggy and distant as he tilted his head to the side and focused on pressing his body back against Wonwoo and moving his lips against the other’s. He could feel the heat of Wonwoo’s skin through the fabric of their shirts as their chests pressed flush together, and part of Mingyu wondered if Wonwoo could feel the furious rhythm of his heart as well as he could. His pulse thundered in his ears, and Mingyu completely forgot about breathing through his nose.

As suddenly as it they had come, Wonwoo’s lips left again, and to Mingyu parting felt like ripping a bandaid off before the count of three.

He didn’t let go of Wonwoo’s waist and blinked rapidly, finally looking down after somewhat sloppily having gathered his bearings and he gave Wonwoo a scandalous look.

Wonwoo’s lips were shiny and tilted into a supple smile, his entire expression tender and soft as he looked at Mingyu. Meanwhile, his eyes were more expressive than any programme at any newyears fireworkshow and practically gleamed up at Mingyu.

“I’ve wanted to do that since you left in the rain.” Wonwoo’s voice was low and breathless, and the natural tremor of his dark voice had a shudder rip through Mingyu’s soul.

“You came to my place.” Mingyu pointed out, putting their forheads together and trying not to get drunk off the feeling of Wonwoo’s breath dancing over his cheeks when the other chuckled.

“Yeah, but you were sick.” How very chivalrous of him, Mingyu thought sarcastically.

“I’m not sick anymore.” He said, watching with a thrill as Wonwoo’s eyes were partially eclipsed by his pupils and noticing the muscle that tensed in Wonwoo’s jaw at his coy tone.

Wonwoo’s lips twisted into something like a smirk.

“… No, you’re not.” He agreed, dragging his gaze up the smooth curve of Mingyu’s neck and jaw, over his lips and flushed cheeks to his eyes where they landed and captured Mingyu under their intensity.

Mingyu couldn’t stand the sound of Wonwoo’s laugh as he eagerly pushed him backwards until they met an edge of a desk and kissed him to make him shut up. (He discarded his bag somewhere on the floor along the way – fuck it, Mingyu was too busy focusing on Wonwoo’s mouth to care about that at the moment)

Going along with the flow, Wonwoo easily got onto the desk and hooked his feet behind Mingyu’s legs after allowing him into the space between his knees, efficiently securing contact between their bodies while keeping Mingyu pressed tightly against himself.

Mingyu’s hands came down to rest flat agains the wooden surface, and Wonwoo’s fingers flickered along his collar before they secured ahold behind Mingyu’s neck, mostly to keep himself upright and from falling onto his back.

Again, Mingyu found himself wondering why they’d never moved onto kissing each other before. It didn’t necessarily change everything, but it definitely made everything _feel_ different. Heat built up much quicker and stronger between them than before, and compared to the sensational thrill of wandering hands, kissing seemed to heighten each and every one of their senses and made every point of contact burn that much hotter and every touch exchanged between them feel that much more intense.

In short, it felt absolutely amazing.

Of course, that also made it that much more nerve wrecking for Mingyu. But frankly, at the time, there was no part of Mingyu that had it in itself to care.

Wonwoo’s tongue was warm and wet as it pressed against Mingyu’s, and at the newfound contact Mingyu felt a jolt of pleasure shoot through him and add onto his already insanely painful arousal pulsing between his legs. Wonwoo nibbled once on his bottom lip before they parted for air, and seeing Wonwoo’s reddened, swollen lips, his dark, tainted cheeks and his half-lidded, lust-clouded eyes, Mingyu could do little to hinder the groan that tore from his throat at the appealing sight.

Wonwoo’s hands were trembling as they held onto Mingyu’s shirt while Mingyu busied himself with the highly tedious and absolutely infuriating task of trying to undo Wonwoo’s pants as fast as humanly possible.

“We — don’t have — a lot of time,” Wonwoo’s eyes followed Mingyu’s fingers, his voice breathless and breaking to inhale between words as he watched their precise actions acutely. “Because someone…” His eyes flickered to Mingyu’s face and a light smile played on his lips. “Took their sweet time getting here.”

Mingyu managed to finally undo the button of Wonwoo’s pants and swiftly tore the zipper down, briefly glancing up only to give Wonwoo a half-hearted glare for finding the distraction to talk about anything as well as unneccessarily reminding them that class would start again in just about ten to fifteen minutes while he pulled the hem of both Wonwoo’s trousers and underwear down just enough to release his erection from its cotton confinement. He didn’t miss the hiss that slipped past Wonwoo’s lips when his dick met the cool air of the room.

“So, we’ll be quick then.” He answered, his voice far more even and collected than Mingyu felt as he went along and undid his own pants, releasing his own member from the maddening preassure of the two garments.

Wonwoo’s eyes immidiatedly raked the outline of Mingyu’s swollen and erect penis, his tongue darting out to wet his bottom lip before he dragged his teeth over it.

“So, w-what do you have in mind?” The slight stutter in Wonwoo’s voice came from the notion that his mind was already completely obscured by different, darker thoughts. “How do you—”

His question was legit, but Mingyu had already begun to move, stepping closer to Wonwoo so as their erections were almost brushing against each other, and his hand reached out to wrap around them both, causing Wonwoo to jump and startle slightly.

“Wha—” Mingyu effectively silenced him by practicing a cautious stroke, getting the feel of the unfamiliar handling of two dicks with one hand and Wonwoo shuddered in his grasp as he tentatively gave them a joint stroke. On the third try, he even managed to pull a gasp from the other’s mouth.

He tried a different technique and jerked his hips forwards against Wonwoo whilst keeping his hand still instead. A sharp wave of pleasure tore through him, and Mingyu instantly decided that this was going to be the method that he was going to use and he rolled his hips again, his dick sliding against Wonwoo’s as he started to build up a pace.

“W–wait—” Wonwoo almost choked on a groan and Mingyu watched him struggle to keep his expression from morphing into that of one out of pure, unvarnished pleasure while he desperatedly clung onto Mingyu as to not fall backwards. He shook his head, his face flushed darkly. “This isn’t — Isn’t this a little too much—?”

Pushing forwards, Mingyu laid him back across the desk and leant over him, meeting Wonwoo’s heated gaze with his own.

“Let’s do it like this.” He murmured quietly and rocked his hips, biting back a groan at the alien sensation. Wonwoo’s breath hitched and by Mingyu’s next thrust his hand flew down and wrapped around Mingyu’s, but it didn’t push him away, just rested there and held on tightly as Mingyu moved their bodies against one another, groans eventually spilling from his lips as he eased into the new position.

Mingyu watched through dimmed eyes as Wonwoo screwed his eyes shut, the blush across his cheeks steadily and surely climbing down his neck and beneath the collar of his shirt to most certainly taint the smooth, hidden skin of his chest with its flush. He drank the sight of Wonwoo’s mouth occasionally falling open in silent moans, the elegant curve and expanse of Wonwoo’s neck when he threw his head back and bit down on his bottom lip to keep his noises to himself, all the while looking extremely and insanely erotic. A great sense of pride arose within Mingyu at the small thought within his head that voiced the fact that it was because of him that Wonwoo was falling apart like this, unraveling and coming undone under his nose. It was all his doing.

Wonwoo gasped and squirmed beneath him, the hand that wasn’t assisting Mingyu downstairs gripping onto his bicep, fingers wrapping around Mingyu’s arm so tightly they were almost assured to leave some form of marks on his skin — not that that bothered Mingyu in the least.

“Mingyu—!”

Mingyu could tell from the strain of Wonwoo’s voice that he was close. His thights squeezed around Mingyu’s hips, and Mingyu took it as a warning from Wonwoo’s body that he was nearing the edge and reaching his limit, but he also realised that he would reach his destination first.

A couple of thrusts later Mingyu choked back a groan as he errupted into their hands, his orgasm wrecking him inside and out and feeling just as intense and fantastic as he had suspected it would be. However, his sense of fullfillment wasn’t total since he even in his blissfully dazed state following his ejaculation was aware that he wasn’t finished, that Wonwoo still had to orgasm and that it was his duty to see to that he did. So while he eased up on the movement of his hips, Mingyu focused on moving his hand (now slick with come) up and down Wonwoo’s shaft. A lovely, shuddering moan sounded from the other, and it drove Mingyu to dive down and lazily capture Wonwoo’s lips in yet another kiss.

Wonwoo groaned shamelessly into the kiss, and Mingyu gratefully swallowed the lewd noise, responding in kind with one of his own groans as he pressed more firmly against Wonwoo and twisted his wrist. Even as he was entering the lull of post-orgasm, Mingyu tried to focus on getting Wonwoo there as well.

Abruptly, Wonwoo’s hand came up and pushed against Mingyu’s chest, pushing him away and breaking their kiss as a string of shudders rippled through him, his mouth falling open to voice his final noises of pleasure.

“ _Ah_ — Ngh—!”

Mingyu watched as Wonwoo’s orgasm hit him and tore through his body, his face scrunching up into that borderline pornographic grimace that he always made, and the way his chest rose greatly as he sucked in a huge breath before he let the air leave him in a rush, his cock pulsing in Mingyu’s grasp and his legs trembling around his waist as he came.

Wonwoo released Mingyu’s arm and let his hand fall down, draping his arm over his face to rest over his closed eyes, and yes, judging by the lingering sting that remained after he’d let go, Mingyu would definitely find marks in the shape of Wonwoo’s fingers against the skin of his arm later that night when he checked.

Chosing to ignore the wet substance sticking to his hand (for now. He’d deal later), Mingyu gazed down at Wonwoo for a moment before he gingerly removed his hand from in between them and very slowly lowered his head until he could rest his ear against Wonwoo’s chest and listen to the soothing, low, rapid beat of his heart as it gradually begun to even out.

Nothing but their labored breathing sounded in the classroom for the following two minutes, and the two boys simply lay there and basked in the after-bliss of their orgasm and the final whisps of their shared intimacy in the peacefull stillness of their world.

Mingyu had closed his eyes, and he pretended not to feel when Wonwoo shifted underneath him. He waited and anticipated what the other would do when faced by his lack of response.

A set of two arms came up to tentatively wrap around him, settling comfortably over his back and holding him close, the warmth they brought easily transferring over to Mingyu’s face (which thankfully Wonwoo couldn’t see from his position anyway, so what did it matter honestly.)

Mingyu tried his hardest not to break under the overwhelming wave of emotion that washed over him as he was held in Wonwoo’s embrace. His heart soared in his chest and his pulse and imagination both ran away with him, his mind screaming at him that this definitely meant something, that Wonwoo must feel something akin to all the things he felt, that it couldn’t be anything other than that, that in the least Wonwoo returned his affections, and Mingyu’s feelings told him that this might very possibly be the happiest moment so far of his life.

Mingyu really, really tried not to listen to those voices and those feelings.

“… Are you asleep?” Wonwoo’s voice cut through the silence that had surrounded them, sounding a little bit amused and a lot like he already knew Mingyu wasn’t. It broke the bubble of serenity that had enclosed around them, and the spell was broken. Mingyu tried not to sigh so heavily.

“No.”

Wonwoo easily unwrapped his arms when Mingyu made to rise fully onto his feet again and followed after, sitting up on the desk. He eyed Mingyu’s hand and readjusted his pants.

“Hold on. I’ve got some tissues in my bag that we could use for that.” He got up and jumped onto his feet, going over to the desk on which he’d originally been sat on when Mingyu had entered the clubroom and dug through his shoulder bag that lay discarded on the belonging chair.

Mingyu watched the arch of his back as he retreived the tissues, his heart lurching in his throat when Wonwoo turned around and almost caught him staring at his bottom.

Wonwoo came back over and kindly set to wiping both of their hands, his fingers delicatly tracing along the familiar shape of Mingyu’s fingers and carefully and meticulously wiping them clean from any stains. The process was almost cermonial, and Mingyu was helpless to fight the heat climbing his neck, making him feel lightheaded and shy even as he watched Wonwoo’s serene expression while he concentrated on the task.

Wonwoo strew the used tissues over the colourful sheets of paper by the teacher’s desk, forbidding Mingyu from sweeping everything into the trashcan at their disposal by declaring that it was a composition, and to ‘let the art speak for itself’.

They left the art-room with three minutes left to get to their respective classrooms.

Only one minute remained when Wonwoo stole one last kiss from Mingyu before they parted ways at the foot of the stairs. Wonwoo wore a smile when he left. Mingyu couldn’t mirror it.

Half a minute remained when Mingyu turned around and decided on another destination.

When the bell rung, Mingyu was walking out the entrance of the school.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut: is back.  
> Sickness: cured.  
> Health: improved.  
> Life: great.
> 
> You're welcome. 
> 
> It's a quick update since this was supposed to be a part of last chapter anyway, which also explains why it's so short (sorry 'bout that~) You didn't expect me to be so fast, did you??! I live to surprise. This chapter is short, but sweet! (a little sexy perhaps? No? OKAY THEN—) lmao, it's hard to be confident with this kind of writing tbh. But yeah, they're cute now, kissing and shit, but even after everything, it's like nothing has changed, has it? *sighs* poor gyu... (And yes, 96line made a bet where Wonwoo was at when he was late for school. In case you're curious, Soonyoung's guess was that he just couldn't be bothered to get out of bed *snickers* which would be plausible, if you ask me.)
> 
> ALSO! How's the message thing looking?? Do you like it? Is it okay? I think it's working, at least.
> 
> Anyway, next chapter will be a while~ But don't worry, not too long. It'll also be around the same length as the previous chapters. This little thing is just an exception in that department.
> 
> Until then, take care!


	5. One step back, two steps forwards

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wonwoo tries to meet Mingyu. He really tries

✧ ✧ ✧

 

Body: Muscular, lean, skinny, beefy, tall, short, hariy, shaved, any type for any taste.

Skin: Flushed, exposed, sweaty, smooth, pale, tanned, glistening, supposedly appealing in any appearance.

Dicks: Long, short, erect, curved, big, thick, all sorts of kinds for pleasure existed appearently.

Wonwoo’s eyes scanned the pictures previewing the videos showing different men of different built with different ethnicities in various compromising positions and situations as he scrolled down the page of the adult website on his tablet whilst lying on the floor in his room on a completely normal, boring Friday evening.

His eyes slid over the shape of the undressed men in the thumbnails in an almost aloof fashion as he showed to be pretty unaffected by the scandalous images tended to be appealing and arousing, but at the same time, one couldn’t say he was anything but immersed in his search.

A sudden knock on his bedroom door startled Wonwoo and had him quickly close the window and place his tablet facedown onto his carpet.

His younger brother stuck his head around Wonwoo’s door and looked at him, oblivious to what his older brother had been looking at only seconds prior to entrance.

“Hyung? Mom made snacks. Won’t you come down and have some with us?” He asked sweetly.

Wonwoo rolled his eyes and lifted his tablet again now that the sudden fright had passed, pretending to go over his Snow feed.

“I’m still stuffed from dinner.” He told his sibling who only smiled knowingly at the back of his head.

“What tea would you like?”

“Green.”

Jeon Bohyuk left his brother’s room again and called down to their mother what tea to prepare while he skipped down the stairs to the first story of their house and Wonwoo waited a few moments before he locked his tablet and followed with a slight huff.

Wonwoo had to admit his mother had a knack for baking, and the simple hotteoks that she had prepared looked appetizable enough decorating a plate on the centre of their diningtable when he entered the kitchen and spotted them. The sweet and thick scent of baking still lingered in the air downstairs along with the subdued, familiar rise of temperature that came with having had the oven running.

His mother was stood by the stove, heating a kettle with water for their tea and Bohyuk had already loaded a smaller plate of hotteok for himself, having thought it unneccessary to await the accompanying beverage before digging in.

“Where’s dad?” Wonwoo took note of the lack of a fourth cup around the table and his mom srhugged behind her kind smile.

“Emergency at work. He was called in — you know how it goes, honey. Tea’s almost ready.”

Wonwoo hummed and checked his phone after he’d snatched a hotteok straight off the big plate, his younger brother noticing his restless habit.

“Mingyu-hyung still not answering your messages?” Wonwoo shot Bohyuk’s tilted grin a narrow eyed glare, quickly putting his phone back into his pocket.

“None of your business.” He replied too quickly.

“So, yes.”

Wonwoo wondered briefly if throwing a hotteok in his brother’s face was an acceptable action for a seventeen year old to take against a twelve year old, but ultimately he decided against it.

“Mingyu-ya? Is he ignoring you?” Their mother shot Wonwoo a worried glance as she filled their cups with the steaming water and Wonwoo shoved another hotteok into his mouth, taking a particularly viscious bite as he tried to maintain eyecontact with Bohyuk.

“Since Wednesday.” Bohyuk supplied needlessly, unfazed by his brother’s antics and Wonwoo frowned.

“I’m going over there tomorrow.” He announced defensively, feeling suddenly uneasy as he thought about Mingyu’s withdrawance over the past couple of days.

“He lives alone, doesn’t he?” His mother pondered aloud as she joined them at the table. She looked at her oldest son. “It’s very good of you to go over there and keep him company.” Her voice held that proud tone that made Wonwoo slightly uncomfortable.

His brother must’ve noticed and decided to take advantage of it.

“You’re always at Mingyu-hyung’s. Might as well move out.” Bohyuk would have to climb over Wonwoo’s dead body and pry the bigger room from his cold, dead fingers. There really was no other way Wonwoo would forfeit it to him, and he told his brother as much with his gaze.

“That would be lovely, I’m sure.” Their mother clasped her hands, oblivious to her childrens silent war. “It’s too bad he can’t do that, though.”

Wonwoo shot his brother a triumphant look. He then eyed the still good amount of hotteoks that still lay on the plate at the centre of the table. A thought struck him.

“If there’s by chance any hotteoks left over, do you maybe think I could bring some for Mingyu?”

His mother’s face lit up at the proposition, whilst Bohyuk contrastingly rolled his eyes while he blew at his tea.

“Of course! That’s a good idea, Wonwoo! I’ll pack some for you immidiatedly. Does he like sweets?” She was already rummaging through cabinets for some nice paper to wrap them up in and Wonwoo watched her from the table.

“Yup.”

She seemed glad to hear this.

“He’ll be very pleased when you bring him some, then.”

Bohyuk called Wonwoo a child when he pointed his tongue at him behind their mother’s back. Wonwoo didn’t see his point at all.

Hour and a half later Wonwoo was fresh out of the shower and back in his room. He was redressing into his pyjamas when he accidentally kicked his abandoed tablet and remembered what he’d been up to before late-night snacks with his family had distracted him.

Picking it up from the floor he re-opened the browser and clicked on a random video. Hearing the expectedly tasteless porno-music begin playing he chuckled before he remembered to turn the sound off. (Just in case Bohyuk decided to creep outside his door for whatever reason.) He watched with mild fascination when a guy shoved his dick into another guy’s throat and the second guy managed not to throw up as the first guy fucked into his mouth. Wonwoo pursed his lips.

_I don’t think I’ll need this for reference…_

His finger hovered over the ‘close tab’ option.

Wonwoo couldn’t imagine him and Mingyu doing that sort of thing together. It just looked so forced and stale and not fun or pleasurable at all in his opinion. He liked the things they did now.

He thought about what possible things Mingyu might like to do.

After making sure his door was closed and locked, Wonwoo took the tablet and lay down on his bed. Watching the two blokes slightly nastily make out he slipped his hand past the waitband of his pants and wrapped his fingers around his flacid cock. Slowly he started to fondle himself while he kept up with the advancement of the video he was watching.

He looked at the position of the actors and found himself ruling it as impossible for them to pull off. He would never be able to bend this or that way, and neither he nor Mingyu harboured the strength one of the guy’s seemed to in the porn. It was in no way realistic, and so complicated Wonwoo didn’t even have the energy to attempt and wrap his head around what measures one would have to take to make it possible.

For him, it had always been about feeling good, and for a guy, that was rather simple. Touching himself was enough, and beating one out was easy. He only had to do what he was doing now, dragging his hand up and down his erection until he reached his point of climax, and then—

_… And then, what?_

Was something supposed to happen after that? Or maybe, was there something more to it that Wonwoo was unaware of?

As he lay there, not-really-watching the adult video, Wonwoo found his mind drifting to Mingyu. He came to think of Mingyu’s scent.

They’d been together for a long time now, and Wonwoo was accustomed to all of Mingyu’s different sides and traits, but if he had to chose something about the other that he particularly liked, it would have had to be the other’s scent.

Mingyu didn’t smell, not in that sense, but ever since they started messing around, Wonwoo had gotten used to being pressed up close and personal to Mingyu’s body, and he’d grown familiar with the personal scent of Mingyu. It wasn’t very noticable from a distance, but whenever Mingyu was leaning over him or pressing against him, Wonwoo got the chance to inhale the scent of his skin, the scent of his clothes, the scent of his hair, all of which smelled so distinct of just _Mingyu_.

In those moments, in Mingyu’s arms, surrounded by the scent of Mingyu, Wonwoo felt really at ease.

His mind already being taken over by the other’s imagined presence, Wonwoo closed his eyes and thought not only about Mingyu’s scent, but also Mingyu’s hands, his touch — the way Mingyu touched him, like an artist admiring a fine sculpture, gently, slowly, thoughtfully. Most of the times, Mingyu’s touch drove Wonwoo mad and he couldn’t stop himself from egging the other on so that he would finally get to still the flames of the all-consuming, restless fire that Mingyu’s touch ignited within him, but now as he was lying there, in his room, masturbating behind closed doors, Wonwoo found his hand’s movements slowing, almost stilling, his fingers carefully mimicking the way his body so vividly could recall how Mingyu usually touched him, attentively, delicately, tauntingly.

Wonwoo was really aroused now, his body hot and his heartbeat irregular. Opening his eyes, Wonwoo glanced down at his pulsing dick and untangled his hand from the erection, looking at the amount of precome smeared across his fingers and palm with perverse amazement.

_Wow._

Just thinking about Mingyu had gotten him like this.

He glanced at the tablet to the side of his head and quickly closed the tab, deleting the search history before he set it aside on the floor by his bed and got back into position, biting his bottomlip to quieten his own noises as he finished pleasuring himself.

He didn’t need it, after all.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

**Mingyu~!!** **♡**

 

( Mingyu~~ Please reply to me~ ㅠㅠ )>  
READ FRIDAY 19.23

( My mom baked for you. I’ll bring the goods over tomorrow. See you then~!  ˆ-ˆ   **♡** ) >  
READ FRIDAY 20.46

( Good morning! ☼ I’ll see you soon~ ˆ0ˆ )>  
SENT 10.34

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

Standing outside Mingyu’s door, Wonwoo felt unfairly anxious. He’d texted Mingyu on Kakao Talk to warn him of his arrival, but had unsurprisingly not received any form of reply. (Not that Wonwoo had counted on it. He knew how Mingyu could be when he put his mind to something.) He did feel slightly guilty for having jerked off with his friend in mind the previous night, and also a little depressed because he still had no idea why Mingyu was ignoring him (yet again. Had Wonwoo not consciously made an effort to be a positive person, he would’ve probably sighed enough for a lifetime by now) but he really didn’t see how that explained why he suddenly felt so uneasy or impatient to see him.

Taking a deep breath meant to ease his climbing nervosity, Wonwoo shook all hesistance from his mind and knocked on the door.

He waited a few moments, listening for movement on the other side of the door. When no such sound came, he tentatively tried his voice.

“… Mingyu?”

No response.

Wonwoo tried knocking again, a little firmer and a little harder this time, calling out a little louder to Mingyu on the other side of the door.

“Mingyu, come on…! I know you’re in there, just open the door for me. It’ll be less painful that way. Mingyu-ya~”

Suddenly Wonwoo felt tired and he ceased his eccessive knocking, letting his fist drop and fall to his side as he stared blankly at the door that had a small nametag that read ‘Kim Mingyu’ in small, bold letters. His other hand was holding the little plastic bag carrying the neatly packed treats his mother had prepeared for him.

Wonwoo heaved a sigh.

It looked like Mingyu still didn’t want to see him.

That was just too bad for him.

Fishing out his keys from his pocket, Wonwoo took a moment to find the correct one before he unlocked the door and let himself inside Mingyu’s familiar apartment.

“I’m home~!” He called lightheartedly as he shut the door after himself, starting to undress without waiting to be invited.

Mingyu stood by the sink, having been in the middle of refilling a water bottle, freezing on his way to re-secure the lid and looking oddly at Wonwoo when he entered. (Wonwoo knew he had heard him perfectly well. It only pissed him off a little.)

Wonwoo stepped out of his shoes and then stared back and Mingyu. He raised the bag with the hotteoks.

“Mom baked. I brought some over. I wrote you.” He knew Mingyu knew all of this already, but he said it anyway. Anything to fill the silence between them.

Mingyu blinked.

“How’d you get in?”

Wonwoo felt Mingyu’s eyes watching him as he ventured into the apartment (he practically lived there anyway, so what the heck) and sat down on the floor beside Mingyu’s bed, placing the bag to the side of himself on the floor and starting to unpack the treats. He made a point of not looking at Mingyu in the meantime.

“I never returned that key your landlady gave me. I told you. We’re practically married.”

As he spoke, Mingyu had refound the mobility in his limbs and had fastened the lid of his bottle again and walked over to sit down beside Wonwoo, giving in to his presence as he knew Wonwoo was too stubborn to leave even if he asked him.

“Right. Of course. I don’t have anything in the refrigerator, so don’t expect anything.” He commented and Wonwoo looked at him then.

Maybe it was because Mingyu had been skipping school since Thursday and they hadn’t really seen each other for a couple of days, but for some reason Wonwoo thought Mingyu looked different. For a second, looking at the other startled him, and then it confused him.

He stared at Mingyu’s face and tried to make out what was so different about him, but the longer he stared, the more he realised there really was nothing different about Mingyu and the more frustrated he grew with himself for not being able to figure out what it was that made his chest squeeze and his stomach feel queasy.

 _Mingyu looked…_ Like he always did, but he — At the same time, Mingyu appared… _No._ No there was nothing about his appearance that was visibly different. _Then why…?_

Maybe he just felt different somehow? There was something… _Something…_ But Wonwoo couldn’t place his finger on it. He gave up.

“Here.” He said instead of explaining why he’d been staring at Mingyu in complete silence for an awkward amount of time. He handed Mingyu a hotteok. “Mom made hotteoks, and she wanted you to have some.”

“I don’t like sweets.” Mingyu stated, arching an eyebrow at Wonwoo, because Wonwoo knew this. Wonwoo had just wanted an excuse to tresspass into Mingyu’s apartment.

 _I masturbated to this guy yesterday,_ Wonwoo’s mind supplied unhelpfully as he stared into Mingyu’s eyes.

“Have you eaten anything yet?” He changed the subject to stop the blush threatening to crawl onto his face, keenly watching Mingyu’s Adams apple bob as he took a drink from his water bottle.

“I haven’t.” Mingyu answered, shrugging. His food-habits weren’t the most regular, but he hadn’t starved yet, so what did it matter?

“You really should.” Wonwoo nagged half-heartedly. “At least a late breakfast or an early lunch or something.”

Mingyu looked at him, and for some reason Wonwoo held his breath.

“… Want to grab something together?” Mingyu’s invitation was gentle and warm, similar to their weather, and Wonwoo remembered how to breathe again.

“Well, I already — the hotteoks —” He made some general gesture with his hands in the air between them and Mingyu simply gave a shrug at his dissmissal, appearently not sensing the weird atmosphere between them as strongly as Wonwoo.

“Don’t you have anything to say to me?”

Mingyu looked up at Wonwoo. Wonwoo met his gaze as bravely as he could. Mingyu looked away after a while, averting his eyes shamefully.

“… Not really. Nothing’s really… changed between us.” Was all he said, and Wonwoo realised that that was as much of an apology that he would get from Mingyu for not replying his messages and that he would have to settle for it. He exhaled slowly, and forced his shoulders to relax.

 _Settle._ Wonwoo could do that.

He straightened up and readied to make his announcement, looking at Mingyu determinedly.

Mingyu was observant of his change of mood and glanced carefully at him in the corner of his eyes.

“I watched gay porn.”

Wonwoo had half expected Mingyu to not give him a reaction at all (because he could be like that, sometimes. Distant) but Mingyu’s eyes cleared and focused on Wonwoo immidiatedly, looking at him with uncovered shock and surprise, as if the very thought of Wonwoo possibly ever doing something like that had never occurred to him.

He didn’t seem to have any words though, so Wonwoo took the silent oportunity to keep talking, although he found it suddenly very difficult to meet Mingyu’s gaze and took to dragging his eyes across the small indentions in Mingyu’s floor.

“There’s a lot you can do using only mouths and hands like we have, but, uh, apparently there’s more to it than that.” Wonwoo could feel even the tips of his ears begin to burn and he felt properly embarrassed talking to Mingyu about this. It felt as if he’d unleashed Pandora’s box, and there was no backing out halfway.

He swallowed and continued.

“Apparently, two guys can do it… kind of like you would do it with a girl.”

Wonwoo chanced a glance at Mingyu’s face. It terrified him a little that he wasn’t able to read Mingyu’s expression very well. There was a small crease between his eyebrows, so small it was barely there, and his dark brown eyes looked like molten chocolate but felt like lava when they looked into Wonwoo’s eyes and scorched every part of his insides with their intensity. Mingyu’s mouth had fallen open, like there was something he wanted to say or ask but for some reason didn’t have the words in his vocabulary to express it. When Mingyu stared at Wonwoo like that, Wonwoo could feel a heat twist and crawl it’s way throughout his body just underneath his skin and he grew restless.

Wonwoo squirmed on the floor, and when it after a while grew apparent he wasn’t going to say anymore, Mingyu licked his lips and tried his voice.

“… Where are you going with this?” He asked, searching for a point in this type of unplanned conversation and Wonwoo looked at his knees.

“I — I’ve been thinking, about the things that you want to do, and I figured that maybe we should, uh, at least try… and do those things. Give them a shot. Try them out… At least, that’s what I thought.”

With his pulse roaring in his ears, Wonwoo drew a sharp inhale and stood from the floor. Mingyu watched him thoughtfully, his lips pursed and the remainder of his face kept carefully neutral for some reason or other as Wonwoo strode over to him (the one and a half steps it took him to get there) and straddled his lap, one knee on each side of Mingyu’s hips.

Mingyu startled, surprised by Wonwoo’s boldness, but he didn’t pull away even as Wonwoo wrapped his arms around his neck and stared decisively down into his eyes. He only looked slightly shocked for a second or two, then his expression visibly relaxed and returned to his impressively impassive mask. (Although, Wonwoo caught the small glance of Mingyu’s eyes to his lips, so he wasn’t all that unreadable.)

Mingyu’s eyes hesitantly met Wonwoo’s. Wonwoo’s cheeks were burning, but he was determined to do this for Mingyu.

“What are you getting on top of me for?” He asked carefully, saying the words deliberatedly slow just to be a pain. Or maybe he was anxious, Wonwoo didn’t know. He just knew that he was very, very, _very_ nervous at the moment.

Quite frankly, Wonwoo’s heart was racing and his head was spinning ridicolously fast as he had no clue as to what exactly he was supposed to do to advance from there, but he wouldn’t let Mingyu see that, so he practiced a collected expression, tilting his head sideways and slightly downwards so that his bangs could fall across Mingyu’s forehead and bravely met Mingyu’s eyes.

He could feel Mingyu’s breath ghost over his chin, and that distinct scent of _Mingyu_ made Wonwoo’s mind grow foggy in seconds.

“Isn’t this what you want…?” Wonwoo was only vaugely aware of the provocative undertone of his voice, which was barely above a whisper, but he could clearly see the slight tremor his words brougth to Mingyu’s pupils and the way the other’s eyes considerably darkened.

Wonwoo would lie if he said that seeing that didn’t both thrill and terrify him a little at the same time.

Feeling like the only way he had left was forwards, Wonwoo slowly lowered his head, intending to indulge Mingyu’s lips in a kiss. However, Mingyu being an idiot (or having some ounce of sense, one of the two) placed a hand on Wonwoo’s shoulder and stopped him, pulling as far away as he could from the body seated on top of him while still remaining upright on the floor.

“Wait, doing things so suddenly — There’s no way we can —” Wonwoo felt extremely stressed by Mingyu’s reluctancy and rejection and grabbed onto the front of Mingyu’s shirt to stop him from leaning back too far.

“It’s okay!” He reassured quickly. “I’ve studied, so — Let me take care of it.” Wonwoo forced Mingyu to look into his eyes. His heart was racing. He felt desperate, although he was uncertain what for. “I think I finally understand what it is that you want to do, so please just let me do this for you.”

He was begging now, searching Mingyu’s eyes for anything that could turn him away, but thankfully Mingyu didn’t look angry, just mostly hesitant, and Wonwoo was confident he could change that.

His hands were trembling as he tucked some strands of Mingyu’s hair behind one of his ears while the other caressed the upper part of Mingyu’s thigh. Wonwoo’s heart had permanently relocated to his throat, and he attempted to swollow it back down into his chest.

“I know I can do it…” His voice sounded as uncertain as he felt, but Wonwoo didn’t let that show when he finally captured Mingyu’s lips in a kiss. He was both happy and relieved when he caught Mingyu’s eyes sliding shut before their lips met, and Wonwoo was glad for what was starting to become a familiar distraction, focusing all of his body and mind into his kiss with Mingyu. He wanted Mingyu to understand how much he meant what he said.

When they parted, Mingyu looked slightly dazed, and Wonwoo felt victorious, until he reminded himself that they were just getting started, and the second time they kissed, they both seemed to let go of the tension in their muscles, finally relaxing into the kiss, Wonwoo’s arms wrapping more comfortably around Mingyu’s neck and Mingyu’s arms sneaking around Wonwoo’s waist and holding onto him tenderly and welcomingly, making Wonwoo’s heart flutter joyously in his chest.

This kiss lasted longer, and they took time to move their lips together sensually, savouring every little tingle of pleasure they could draw from each other’s mouths, and Wonwoo was slowly but surely starting to feel overwhelmed by it.

Mingyu’s lips were warm and moist against his, his body hot and firm under Wonwoo’s hands, Mingyu’s arms around his back strong and comforting and safe, Mingyu’s taste and scent and touch and _everything Mingyu_ that would soon be everything Wonwoo would be able to feel crawling it’s way into and occupying every corner of Wonwoo’s mind until he felt dizzy and like he couldn’t think straight anymore and all of it was quickly becoming too much for him to handle. His chest was aching from the furious thunder of his heart, and Wonwoo felt as if he was burning up. His skin itched all over, his lungs had lost their capacity of storing oxygen, Wonwoo couldn’t think, see, breathe, and it was lovely, and terrifying, and nice, and  _too much._ He couldn’t do this.

And in an instant of that realisation, Wonwoo tore away from Mingyu, leaning so far back so fast one might’ve suspected he had been zapped by electricity.

Mingyu’s cheeks were as flushed as Wonwoo’s own, and Wonwoo’s vision spun when he glanced at the redness of Mingyu’s thuroughly ravished lips. Wonwoo felt very young and very fragile under Mingyu’s confused and inquisitive stare after he’d retreated.

It took Wonwoo a couple of seconds to calm down, and then a couple of more seconds to realise that he had to say something, and he scrambled for an explenation for his behaviour.

“I — It’s still kind of…!” He felt flustered and thrown off balance and had no idea what to do. This new prospect of their relationship wasn’t something he was used to, and he was disoriented. “I–I know we’ve done this before, a–and all, but — I — I can’t do this after all.”

Abruptly, he stood, heading towards his stuff in the hall, not knowing where to go, but knowing that he couldn’t stay in there any longer, couldn’t stay near Mingyu, or he suspected he might crumble or explode.

There was _something_ there that Wonwoo had to get away from. He wasn’t so sure if it was Mingyu or some part of himself.

“This is too embarrassing. I can’t handle it — I thought I could, but I can’t. I just want to feel good, and I’m trying to understand the things you want, but as I thought, it’s too much for me.” He got into his jacket and put on his shoes while he spoke. Wonwoo was aware that he was blabbering, but Mingyu hadn’t said anything yet, and Wonwoo wasn’t sure if he even wanted him to. “For me, just touching each other is fine, but you want to be closer than that, don’t you? You want to…” Wonwoo hesitated in front of the door and bit his lip, urging his racing heart to calm down as the images from the video last night flooded his thoughts.

He forced himself to look at Mingyu over his shoulder, and he was gratefull that he couldn’t quite decipher his expression apart from the confusion he could see in Mingyu’s eyes.

“… You want to do things like this, right?” He didn’t need to wait for an answer, Wonwoo knew he was right, and just like he’d come, Wonwoo left again in a flurry, quickly walking away and putting Mingyu’s apartment complex far behind him.

However, the further he got, the less did Wonwoo feel like he was about to suffer a heart attack, and his chaotic thoughts became more divergent.

He realised what an utter moron he had acted liked, and rather than embarrassment he felt his cheeks flame in humiliation and anger directed at himself.

What the heck had he just done? What had he been _thinking?_ Stupid!

He quickly stopped being angry though, because he acknowledged that maybe he had tried to rush things, maybe his approach had been a little too aggressive, not exactly setting either of them out for success, and Wonwoo felt solemn.

Then he thought about Mingyu, what he must be thinking about and feeling after Wonwoo’s glorious impact on his day, and it was only with slight reluctance and anxiety that Wonwoo pulled his phone out and clicked through his applications until he found the one he was looking for.

Before he could change his mind, before his guilt washed away, he typed up a message and sent it off, huffing as he shoved his phone back into his pocket and turned back.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

Mingyu stared after Wonwoo after the door had shut. He was baffled. Stupified. Slightly aroused too, considering the track things had been heading down before Wonwoo had pulled the breaks and ran away (because that’s what he had done. Mingyu had eyes and he wasn’t dense.)

He had no clue what Wonwoo’s agenda had been that day. He’d done the usual and forced his way back into Mingyu’s life even as Mingyu had ignored him for days and tried to shut him out, but then he’d initiated something they’d never done before and then he’d out of the blue just up and walked away all on his own. Mingyu wasn’t sure what that meant. He wasn’t sure what any of the things Wonwoo had said to or done with him just now had meant.

He’d admitted to watching porn with two men, something Mingyu would forever have put past Wonwoo, told Mingyu that he’d gotten an idea of what kind of things Mingyu wanted to do (it was the right idea, alright) and that he was willing to and even kind of wanted to try it out (? Signals were slightly unclear by this point and some details might’ve gone over Mingyu’s head) and then Wonwoo had straddled Mingyu’s lap and kissed him and every other coherent thought or concern about the situation had completely abandoned Mingyu’s mind. How could they have not?

When it came to Wonwoo, Mingyu was powerless. He could never push him away and he could never reject him (although he did try, but come on, who was he kidding) especially not when Wonwoo was in his lap, his arms around Mingyu’s neck and everything about him, his eyes, his lips, his voice, his body, his touch just so maddeningly enticing that Mingyu couldn’t look away.

To Mingyu, Wonwoo was almost sickeningly desirable and once they’d started kissing, Mingyu forgot all about every doubt he had about Wonwoo’s commitment to his words, which, he realised now, had been provingly stupid and very naïve of him.

Wonwoo had managed to utterly shock him, waltzing into his apartment and back into his heart, bringing up sex and suddenly kissing him silly and then leaving just as easily. It had been too fast for Mingyu to accurately comprehend when it had transpired.

He thought about it now though, cheeks burning and mind shaken, about actually having sex with Wonwoo one day, and he realised the possibility appealed to him greatly. Just imagining it had him visualise the afterlife, and he was definitely certain it was something he’d really, really like to do with Wonwoo. He’d just always thought if they lasted that long that they’d work it out together and get there eventually, but everything changed now that Wonwoo had dived head-first into it without even considering that he might get water over his head by doing so.

The serious question was where did they go from here?

Wonwoo had stormed off. Mingyu had stayed. Were things okay between them, or did Wonwoo need space? Would Mingyu be the one on the receiving end of his typicall method of ignoring Wonwoo when they were on bad terms for once? Woud he have to walk around with all these new thoughts and possibilities in his mind while Wonwoo avoided him, left to pine by himself and all on his own?

Mingyu was so caught up in the whirlwind of his of mind that he didn’t catch the notification when he received a message, but he managed to catch the reminder that sounded after a minute, and he quickly scrambled after his phone, unlocking it with lightning speed to rake his eyes over the scarcely worded message on his screen.

He didn’t fight the genuine smile that came over his face when a wave of relief washed over him. He quickly typed an affirmative reply before he got onto his feet and got dressed to head out.

The answer to where they would go from there was obvious, and Mingyu was glad that his worries had been disproved before they’d been able to settle in his heart.

He grabbed his wallet and keys and locked the apartment after himself as he headed out.

 

**JWonWoo**

 

<( I want that lunch. )  
RECEIVED 11.27

( Where do you want to go? )>  
SENT 11.31

 

They could only go forwards.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaand, we get to see Wonwoo's thought process in this story~ Are you pleased? We'll be following Mingyu mainly, but sometimes we'll get to peek into Wonwoo's head and get to know his opinions and feelings regarding everything that is part of his and Mingyu's tango ㅋㅋㅋㅋ Yay~ Right?
> 
> This chapter is short too!!!! I'm sorry~ TT-TT But the next one is seventeen (ASDFGHJKL—!!) pages, and there's some healing ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) *wiggles eyebrows* So looks forwards to it~
> 
> Leave a comment, kudos, I'd really appriciate it! (... and reading and replying to comments kind of make my day, lmao, so don't be shy!!)
> 
> Also, for fun times, follow my tumblr: @jeonwonwoosass. You can even chat with me if you'd like ^.^
> 
> In (the likely) case I don't update before the weekend, happy holidays! Spend it with family, or friends, and do something that makes you happy :) xoxo!


	6. I wish you would never let me go.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are easier when we're not apart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I LIED

✧ ✧ ✧

 

“So, anyway, the competition is soon, and our club-president is stressing out so much about it. Last time I caught him watching videos of our competitors on youtube while he was using the loo, _and_ taking notes at the same time! It’s crazy I tell you! On our last practice, he even made us—” Soonyoung spoke animatedly, gesturing his arms around wildly while Junhui hummed, not really listening to his tale, and Jihoon kept a carefully straight face as to not show his utter disinterest about their friend’s struggle during his club activites, rolling his eyes behind Soonyoung’s back when the newly turned brunette was too invested in his story to notice him turn his gaze elsewhere. Jihoon’s eyes fell on Wonwoo who wasn’t listening and wasn’t even trying o hide it. He was staring out over the schoolyard, not really looking at anything specific.

Summer was approaching, and the weather had become really pleasant, allowing for the students of their school to spend their breaks outdoors, eating their lunch on the grass under the shade of one of the trees or enjoy the warmth of the sun that had yet to become unbearable on any of the benches spread within the grounds. The four friends were doing the latter, occupying one of the benches standing along the graveled pathway that lead through the yard on the frontside of the school building during their lunchhour, although all four of them had already finished their food inside their classroom before they’d headed out.

Junhui had brought his sunglasses that were ridicoloussly big, the accessory dressing his face now as he leant back on the bench, his arms thrown over the back and his legs elegantly crossed in front of himself as he enjoyed the warmth of the sun in his now charcoal black hair.

Soonyoung had folded the sleeves of his uniform shirt and undone the three first buttons, exposing his pale skin to the sunlight without fear of getting burnt and in the hopes that it would help him keep somewhat cool. (Although his excessive moving about while he spoke contradicted that goal.) Jihoon had taken to copying him with his sleeves, although he kept the buttons of his dress-shirt untouched.

Wonwoo was looking out over the yard, tuning out his friends conversation to his right as his eyes absentmindedly slid over the grass and green-leaved trees, occasionally taking to rest on a couple or group of students out and about in the sun, watching them exchange lunches or share jokes, but mostly his eyes drifted to the few and unthreatening white clouds in the vast, blue sky above their heads as he was completely lost in thought.

Jihoon looked at him strangely.

“What’s up?” He questioned beside Soonyoung, the latter ignoring that no one seemed to be listening to him anymore as he kept complaining about the dance-club’s upcoming competition.

Wonwoo tore his eyes away from the couple of guys seated against the trunk of a tree on their general left, one of them sleeping while the other poured over some book.

“Hm?” He commented distractedly and Jihoon frowned at his unfocused state of mind. To his right, Soonyoung perked up.

“Oh. There’s Chan. I better go and check in with him before class starts again.” The other three watched him get up and followed his back with their eyes as the brunette jogged up to the underclassman coming along the walkway with a friend, striking up conversation that probably revolved around their club.

“Good grief, I thought he’d never stop.” Junhui looked grateful for the absence of noise and Jihoon tilted his head in agreement.

“Cut him some slack. He’s the only one out of us who’s stuck with a club throughout the three years we’ve been here, and now that their competition is coming up, he’s allowed to be stressed out. He’s probably overworked too — god knows how many days a week they can force their members to practice for something.” Jihoon kicked at a small rock by his feet and watched it bounce away.

Wonwoo blinked, beginning to catch up to their conversation.

Junhui placed his right hand over his heart and looked at Jihoon over the tinted frame of his sunglasses.

“I have club activities too!” He protested, and Jihoon smirked at his offended expression.

“Your Mandarin after-school class doesn’t count. You’re practically fluent, _Moon Junhui_.” He recalled the other’s official Chinese name and Junhui puffed his cheeks out and crossed his arms with a small huff.

“Well, I was born in China, so I would hope so, _Lee Jihoon_.” He shot back, but Jihoon had already bored of him and had turned back to his left and was looking at Wonwoo again.

“Why’re you so quiet?” He asked, concerned with the lack of remarks from their friend over the past twenty minutes. Junhui leant forwards so that he could peek around Jihoon and look at their friend too.

“Yeah, you’re unusually quiet. Something on your mind?”

Wonwoo pondered their questions briefly, but found that there was a lack of ‘something’ on his mind, and more of a ‘ _someone_ ’.

Rather than saying this, he found it easier to simply shrug his shoulders in dissmissal of his friends concern.

Jihoon narrowed his eyes but didn’t say anything immidiatedly. Junhui snickered and went to lighten the mood a little.

“Aw, is our Wonnie-ya depressed?” He asked with a sickeningly sweet and mannered voice and leant over Jihoon’s lap to reach his arms out as if to envelop Wonwoo in an embrace. “Come here and let Junhui-nim make it all better!”

Jihoon swore and kneed Junhui in the chest, making Wonwoo’s lips pull into a smile and a laugh bubbled out of his mouth.

“I think I’ll pass.” He chuckled as his friends squabbled, pushing at each other on the bench until they’d straightened out their seating arrangement again.

“So, what’s the matter then?” Jihoon asked after brushing imagined dirt off his shoulder, and Wonwoo’s face returned to its neutral slate.

“I…” He wasn’t sure. He wasn’t in a bad mood, not really. So why was he feeling so distant from everything? He frowned and Jihoon and Junhui looked on as he disappeared into his own head again.

“Is it about Mingyu?”

That sentence alone cleared the reason for Wonwoo’s solemn mood as his eyes darkened visibly at the mention of the other’s name.

Junhui arched his eyebrows triumphantly at Jihoon who only gave him a glare and rolled his eyes at his childish antics before he turned his gaze back to Wonwoo who remained uncharaceristicly silent.

“You haven’t been picking on him again, have you? If so, he’s completely justified to avoid you.”

Wonwoo shook his head at the same time as Junhui.

“What are you talking about?” The Chinese said, disagreeing with Jihoon before his head turned towards Wonwoo. “I think the two of you have been acting awefully civil towards one another lately. Not that it’s a bad change or anything,” He shrugged indifferently and leant back. “It’s just that usually, I think Mingyu-ssi seem to be more open around you than anyone else – he becomes more expressive, you know?”

Part of Wonwoo was mildly surprised that that was how others viewed their relationship.

“He’s always been kind of closed-off and good at determinedly pushing people away, but lately, to some extent, that has seemed to start including you, which it didn’t use to.” Junhui had set his sunglasses to rest atop his head now and his eyes slid to meet Wonwoo’s. “Am I wrong?” He asked.

Jihoon stared at Junhui for a while longer before he too twisted his neck and looked at Wonwoo. Sometimes, Junhui surprised them when he showed that his mind wasn’t as shallow and superficial as he sometimes chose to make it appear.

Wonwoo chewed at his bottom lip.

“… No.” He admitted.

“I knew it.” Junhui said and Jihoon felt like elbowing him between the ribs for his lack of sensitivity on the subject when it clearly bothered Wonwoo. But he reminded himself to at least try and retain from voilence and opted to fume silently instead.

Meanwhile Junhui was completely focused on Wonwoo.

“So, what’s wrong this time? Are the two of you having a fight? Is it one of his bad weeks?”

It struck Jihoon that maybe Junhui was the one out of the three of them that was actually the closest to Wonwoo, and that perhaps they even spoke to each other over the phone sometimes and that maybe Junhui was the most informed of the joys and shortcomings of Wonwoo and Mingyu’s sometimes feeble and all the time odd friendship.

Dissmissing all of Junhui’s guesses, Wonwoo pursed his lips and shook his head again, looking very deflated and tired when he finally sighed.

“I don’t know. Maybe? No…” He looked as undecisive as he sounded and he stared at Soonyoung and his dongsaeng who were now very invensted in their rundown of some choreography a bits away from them, either forgetting that their demonstration was bound to draw people’s attention or simply not caring that it did. Either of the two were plausible when it came to Soonyoung.

Wonwoo furrowed his brows, concentrating his mind on his and Mingyu’s interactions over the last couple of days (The ones that hadn’t involved… well…) and found that they had been somewhat lacking, although he wasn’t sure of what.

“We’re not fighting.” He said, petulant. “Mingyu’s not avoiding me. It’s just — I don’t know. Something feels…”

“Off?” Jihoon supplied helpfully, scrunching his nose as he tried to think of anything to say that would cheer Wonwoo up. Wonwoo nodded and Jihoon and Junhui exchanged a hesitant glance.

“Wonnie-ya.” Junhui looked at Wonwoo with soft eyes. “Do you like Mingyu-ssi?”

“Yeah.” Wonwoo responded immidiatedly and the other two were relieved to hear the certainty in his voice. Junhui grinned and leant back again, lowering his sunglasses onto the bridge of his nose once more.

“See? Don’t worry about it. The both of you are just a couple of idiots.” He said easily and folded his arms behind his head at the same time as Soonyoung waved goodbye to Chan and started to head back towards them.

Jihoon laid a hand on Wonwoo’s thigh and caught his eye, squeezing the leg softly in what he hoped could count as a reassuring manner and looked at the dark haired male seriously.

“It’s going to be fine. Don’t worry too much.” He said and felt successful when Wonwoo returned a gentle smile.

Soonyoung strode up to them and threw himself down in-between Jihoon and Wonwoo, breaking their small moment and ignoring the grunt of protest coming from the shorter male when he almost sat on top of and dislocated his arm. Oblivious to the conversation that had transpired between the three while he had been gone, the brunette threw his arms around the shoulders of his two friends on one side each of his body and looked between them.

“What? What’s up? What’re you talking about?” He asked and Jihoon shoved his arm off of him while shooting daggers at Soonyoung’s profile with his eyes.

“Nothing much.” Junhui said almost too quickly, and Soonyoung looked sceptically to him at the same time as Jihoon stepped on Junhui’s foot.

Wonwoo felt his smile widen as he beheld his three friends interact with each other normally (Well, normal for them anyway) and felt that maybe he could take Junhui and Jihoon’s words to heart. It would be okay.

“Nice moves out there.” He offered and Soonyoung forgot the strange behaviour of the two people on his right and turned to Wonwoo with a bright smile.

“You think so? Well, it’s really just a small part for our intro, but I bet it’ll look really cool when everything’s done and we can nail all the moves effortlessly without any hic-ups! Oh man, you totally have to come watch us when we perform — you’re going to come right?” He easily dived into his world of dancing and only paused to make sure all three of them would nod at his wonder before he gladly continued.

“Good, because it’s going to be totally awesome! We have this concept, right,”

“Are you allowed to spoil that?” It was clear from Junhui’s tone of voice that he was amused and Soonyoung blew air out of his nose and turned to shoot him a tilted grin.

“No, and when you see it you’re going to pretend you had no idea and act really amazed and impressed by our club’s unique and creative idea and cheer really loudly for us when we start and finish.”

“See? We don’t even really need to go, Soonyoung has already conjured our presence in his mind.” Jihoon drawled and Soonyoung paid him back by trapping him in a highly undesired embrace, a war of struggle breaking out between them as they forgot about Soonyoung’s competition and Junhui looked on and laughed at them until one of Jihoon’s fists hit him square in his solar plexus and silenced him, forcing him to fold double and drape himself over his own knees in pain while Wonwoo watched everything play out from the sideline.

His mind wandered to his and Mingyu’s quickly exchanged kiss in the perfectly empty restroom they’d met in by pleasant coincidence that morning and Wonwoo’s smile slowly began to slip from his face as his thoughts began to cloud his head again.

Wonwoo wasn’t ignorant. He’d noticed the new habit Mingyu had made of keeping his distance from him. Even though they saw each other and talked to each other pretty much every day, there were tiny actions, like Mingyu not meeting Wonwoo’s eye or Mingyu withdrawing his hand when their knuckles accidentally brushed that had quickly drawn his attention to it. It wasn’t palpable, but if he got the chance, Mingyu would chose to withdraw from Wonwoo lately, and that bothered him.

At the same time, their relationship hadn’t really had any hugely noticable change, (they’d… sort of slowed down after Wonwoo’s painfully failed attempt to go further) and whenever they kissed and touched each other Mingyu was suddenly very participative and present (For Mingyu’s birthday, they’d spent the entire afternoon between Mingyu’s sheets…), and just thinking about the way Mingyu’s warm hands felt against his skin when they slid down his body, Wonwoo’s cheeks tinted slightly pink and he had to stop his mind from continuing further down the naughty track it had strayed onto.

Wonwoo couldn’t even explain it to his friends, but it was… Mingyu was… He was… The things they did, everything between them had become…

He sighed silently as his mind still couldn’t get a clue as to what exactly it was that didn’t sit entirely right with him. All Wonwoo knew was that he was worrying about Mingyu lately, even as the other never really gave any indication that he was unwell or dissatisfied by anything.

It was just that lately, Wonwoo had the impression that Mingyu was lying to him about something.

He couldn’t figure out what it was that Mingyu would hide from him.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

**JWonWoo**

 

<( Soonyoung was amazing!! ☆ So good!! His dongsaeng was really nice too! You should’ve come )  
RECEIVED YESTERDAY 21.18

<( Come out ~ ^-^ )  
RECEIVED 14.22

Mingyu blinked at the screen of his phone for a full minute before he slowly rose from his bed and peeked out his window. On the street below his building Wonwoo was playing around with his earphones, but as if he could sense Mingyu’s eyes on him he looked up and gave a grin and a wave.

Now that he’d been spotted, Mingyu realised he didn’t really have a choice but to go. Wonwoo would just invite himself otherwise, and the wheater was really nice today, he figured that maybe it was suitable to enjoy it and go out for once.

He unlocked his windowframe and pushed it open, inhaling the scent of flowers drifting along with the wind all the way from the small botique at the corner across the street to his apartment and allowing some fresh air to swoop into his room.

“I’ll be down in a minute.” He called to Wonwoo who simply gave him a thumb up in response, and Mingyu shut the window again (figuring it was smarter to not leave it open while he was gone) and turned around to pull on a shirt.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

✦☆ ♡ **Junhun** ♡ ☆✦

 

<( _https://www.existenz.kr/out.php?id=77653[…]_ )  
RECEIVED 13.12

<( WATCH THIS!!! )  
RECEIVED 13.12

<( Honnie’s face turned white!!!! >ㅂ< ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ )  
RECEIVED 13.12

( !!! o-o;;; )>  
READ 13.12

<( I recommend you watch it with Mingyu-ssi~ ㅋㅋㅋ… )  
RECEIVED 13.13

( >3<;; ~ ♡ )>  
READ 13.14

Mingyu stared at the chat on Wonwoo’s phonescreen, the only (slightly dark) thought that came to his mind being that Wonwoo had given Junhui’s contact name a really unneccessary amount of emoticons.

Across from him at the table, Wonwoo was awaiting some sort of comment or reaction with an excited smile and glittering eyes. Mingyu raised his gaze and looked at him tentatively with one eyebrow quirked. He didn’t even have to voice his question before Wonwoo answered him.

“It’s a link. To a video.” He said, practically bouncing in his seat as he laid his phone on the table. Mingyu pulled a face and took another spoon of his soup.

“What sort of video?” The way Wonwoo had said it had urged him to ask, and Wonwoo’s eyes gleamed with a hint of mischieviousness, giving Mingyu a reason to feel suspicious.

“Well, according to Junhui,” Wonwoo leant in over the table so that he could lower his voice and still allow for Mingyu to hear him. “It’s a video of a girl doing it raw with a toy. At some point she supposedly puts it all the way up her assho—” Mingyu silenced Wonwoo with a gesture of his finger, feeling his face contort in a frown as he momentarily put down his spoon and pinched the bridge of his nose.

He took a breath and counted to three before he picked his spoon up again and looked at Wonwoo.

“… Why does Junhui-ssi send you… those kinds of videos?” Even as he asked, Mingyu wasn’t sure he really wanted to know.

Wonwoo grinned, unfazed by Mingyu’s distaste.

“No reason.” He chirped before he took a swig of his water, letting the glass make a sounding thud when he placed it back on the wooden surface of the table. “We should watch it.” He announced, causing Mingyu to drop the liquid in his spoon back into the bowl.

Mingyu tried to gauge if Wonwoo was actually serious.

“No.” He said, but Wonwoo pretended as if he couldn’t hear him.

“Jihoon even got really grossed out!” Mingyu had read as much and he contemplated this for a moment.

“Is Jihoon gay?” He voiced his genuine wonder, returning to his food while Wonwoo’s eyes looked as if they were going to budge out of his skull.

“ _What?_ ” His voice raised a pitch (which honestly didn’t make it that much brighter) and he looked absolutely taken-aback by the suggestion. “Why would he be _gay?!_ ” Mingyu wished Wonwoo would lower the volume of his voice and also not sound so opposed to the concept.

Wonwoo tilted his head to the side, the very idea apparently sounding absolutely ridicolous to him.

“He’s not! Probably?” Mingyu wondered why Wonwoo added ‘probably’. “Just because he didn’t like an adult video of a girl performing anal doesn’t mean he doesn’t fancy them in general. I’m sure he likes breasts just fine!”

“How unpleasant…” Mingyu muttered, feeling like he could’ve gone without imagining Wonwoo’s classmate fondling a pair of giant breasts and also referring to the feeling of everyone in the restaurant giving them judgemental glares. Wonwoo clicked his tongue at him.

“Why do you have to sound so condenscending about it? Everyone’s got a sex drive.”

“You’re being too loud.”

“Well, what about you?” Wonwoo ignored him again in favour of resting his elbows on top of the table and nailing Mingyu with his eyes. “Are you gay?”

Mingyu was void of any reaction, his mind momentarily going blank as the question sunk into head and settled between his ears. By a strike of luck, Wonwoo didn’t give Mingyu any time to consider the meaning of his fright regarding the possibile accuracy of the statement as he kept on talking like he never expected an answer to begin with, glancing at his phone when he received a message.

“I don’t think that has anything to do with Jihoon’s reaction.” He said and finished a reply to whoever had written him before putting his phone back onto the table “It’s probably just really nasty.” He plucked Mingyu’s spoon from his hand and submerged it in the soup before he raised it to Mingyu’s lips, meeting his eyes. “Say ‘ah~’.”

Mingyu looked at him to see if he was joking, but Wonwoo insisted, circling the spoon carefully in the air in front of his face.

“Come on.” He cooed and Mingyu stared blankly at him.

“I don’t want it.” He said, but Wonwoo didn’t yield.

“You’re not leaving any behind — that’s a waste of food! Think about the starving kids in africa.”

“That’s so cliché.” Mingyu snorted, but Wonwoo pressed his lips together.

“Eat.” He demanded and Mingyu folded underneath his determined eyes and took the spoon into his mouth, swallowing the liquid and observing how satisfied Wonwoo looked as he returned the utensil to the table. He looked up at Mingyu from under his lashes once he was done, a playful smile adoring his lips.

“Come on.” He said encouragingly. “Watch it with me.”

Mingyu wasn’t sure weather to feel angry or dissapointed with himself after learning that he still after all of these months couldn’t say no to Wonwoo.

Although, getting to see Wonwoo’s entire face light up and practically beam when he reluctantly agreed wasn’t so bad either.

“Great! Oh, but I want to check out some stores first while we’re in town. You’re gonna keep me company in the meantime.”

Mingyu allowed Wonwoo to feed him the rest of the soup too, pretending to be blissfully unaware of the small fact that they probably looked like two embarassing children while they giggled about it.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

They walked around and took their time, dropping into that store and this store, entering anywhere that looked good and interesting enough to either one of them.

“Hey, Mingyu, look at this!” Wonwoo paraded through the store towards where Mingyu was loitering around by the footwear, a ridiculously bedazzled cap sitting atop his head and Mingyu gave him a bemused look.

“Should I buy it?” Wonwoo grinned at his frown and did an unneccessary twirl just to embarrass Mingyu further. Mingyu tried to fight the smile wanting to pull his face into a grin.

“Put that thing back where you found it.”

“They have one in black as well. If we both get one, we could match!” Wonwoo looked entertained by the idea and Mingyu quickly dragged him back to where he’d taken the cap and made sure he put it back.

Wonwoo liked fashion and clothes. Mingyu solely went shopping because he never quite had any particular urge to and didn’t pay much mind to what he was wearing, but he didn’t mind going with Wonwoo on occasion to different stores and botiques just to browse and spend time together. Watching Wonwoo enjoy himself made Mingyu happy in some sense, after all.

They walked past one of those rotating shelves on wheels with different frames of glasses, and Wonwoo noticed a pair that pulled his attention. Mingyu stopped too as Wonwoo plucked the glasses from the hook and put them over his nose.

“How’re these?” He asked, turning to let Mingyu see how he looked in the dull frames.

“They’re cute.” Mingyu said honestly and Wonwoo removed the pair from his face and picked up another type with thick, squared black rims.

“What about these?” He grinned widely, as if he already knew Mingyu would label them as dorky and just wanted to try them on to mess with him and Mingyu rolled his eyes good-humouredly, allowing a tilted smile.

“Not bad.” He said sarcastically and Wonwoo huffed, checking his reflection in one of the small mirrors.

“I think I look dashing!” Even as he said so, Wonwoo placed the glasses back in their spot and fell silent as he carefully looked through the display to see if there were any others he would want to try on. (He lifted a really ridicolous pair of sunglasses, but even before he had the chance to ask Mingyu his opinion the other plucked them from his face and put them back with a “Don’t ever wear those again.” Wonwoo pretended not to pout at his straight rejection.)

Wonwoo actually needed glasses, for reading and such, but it had taken Mingyu almost eight months to learn about it, as the other preferred to use lenses every day of the week. He thought about Wonwoo’s slim frames probably stuffed into one of Wonwoo’s drawers in his room now as the other studied another pair and found himself thinking that it was a shame Wonwoo didn’t want to use them more regularly. Glasses actually suited him, opposite to his beliefs.

“Hey.” Wonwoo’s voice pulled Mingyu’s attention back to him and Mingyu eyed the neat, rounded silver frames circling Wonwoo’s eyes, which were gazing at him quizically. “Do these look dumb?”

Mingyu couldn’t really bring himself to answer at first, because he suspected his voice would fail him. Wonwoo looked really, really nice in the glasses. They were cute, but charming, as well as handsome at the same time, and Mingyu’s heart fluttered within his chest at the sight, his pulse quickening ever so slightly. He wet his lips and prayed that his voice wouldn’t come out as breathless as he suddenly felt when he spoke.

“You look really nice.” He said earnestly and watched Wonwoo’s breath hitch at the tender tone of his voice. “They suit you.”

A soft blush slowly crept over Wonwoo’s cheeks at the genuine compliment and he lowered his gaze, fiddling with the edge of the frames dressing his face shyly, only making him look all the more adorable in Mingyu’s eyes.

“I really like it when guys wear glasses. I think it makes them look sharp and handsome.” Mingyu said as he met Wonwoo’s eyes, trying not to show how nervous he felt to admit something like that to Wonwoo’s face. But maybe his words could somehow make Wonwoo less insecure about wearing the prescribed item for his eyesight.

“I wish you’d wear yours more often.” He finished softly, hoping he wasn’t going too far or sounding too greasy, and by now Wonwoo had a deep flush staining his face and he refused to look at Mingyu.

“I think you fit better into that description than I do.” He said lightly chosing to ignore Mingyu’s last sentance as he turned his back to Mingyu, probably not wanting Mingyu to see his expression, but even his ears were burning bright red, giving the other a pretty good idea of what it looked like anyway.

They visited a couple of more stores, Wonwoo managed to get Mingyu into some ridicolous cardigan that gave him a good laugh and a picture for future blackmail material, only to end up disapointed when Mingyu bought it out of spite, inspiring Wonwoo to get one himself just so that they could match and look terrible together, and Mingyu found some second-hand games for his console that he bought in another store for a cheap amount of money as well. They decided to head back to Mingyu’s a little past five and obtained some snacks to bring along on their way to the bus. The weather had been nice the entire time, and when Wonwoo fell asleep on his shoulder on the way back, Mingyu even got to inhale the scent of his hair without feeling completely like a creep.

Wonwoo had ended up buying those glasses, by the way, much to Mingyu’s secret delight, the case safely tucked into a small, yellow plastic-bag that he held onto during the busride, even in his sleep.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

Mingyu sat on his bed, nibbling on a chip from the recently opened bag in his lap while Wonwoo connected his laptop to his TV with a cable, enabling them to watch the video Junhui had linked on a bigger screen. (Why they’d want to do that, Mingyu had no clue.)

Wonwoo made a small cheer when the connection worked and immidiatedly went to open a fresh window in the browser that would soon be tinted by the address they were about to enter. Once they were on the site, Wonwoo made some final adjustments to the sound, so that they wouldn’t accidentally give Mingyu’s neighbours anything to speculate about (in addition to them) once they actually played the video currently showing some blurry thumbnail of someone’s bed.

“While we’re watching this—” Wonwoo spoke as he brought the laptop along with him to Mingyu’s bed and sat down beside him, shooting him a playfull glance. “Tell me if you’d like any assistance.” He made an obscene gesture with his hand and laughed when Mingyu smacked him across the face with one of his pillows. He pressed play before Mingyu could attempt to slither his way out of their agreement for a third time and put the laptop aside as the video started up.

An averagely pretty girl with too heavy makeup greeted the camera and Mingyu tried to keep a straight face at the sight of her bare skin. The noises she made even before she’d actually started touching herself sounded slightly forced and strange to Mingyu’s ears, but he assumed it was to excite the viewer or whatever, so he chose not to dwell on it.

She wasted little time, and it wasn’t very long before she’d brought out her toy and was playing around with it, teasingly dragging it down her chest and along the curve of her boobs, giggling peculiarly when it poked her nipples. Mingyu wondered how Junhui had managed to get Jihoon to sit down long enough to actually watch it. He suspected rope to have been involved.

[ _Do you want to watch me put this up my ass?_ ]

Her expression was sweet, but her words were nasty and Mingyu couldn’t really find it tasteful as she blinked lewdly at the camera, a finger to her lips in an attempt to strike a seductive pose.

[ _I’ll do it just for you…_ ]

Was Wonwoo enjoying this? Glancing at him, his expression didn’t tell Mingyu much.

The girl started lowering the toy towards her genitals and then —

Out of nowhere, a witch jumped in front of the camera, a loud, shrill shout sounding in Mingyu’s room and beside him Wonwoo startled badly, screaming at the sudden jump-scare. The video ended abruptly with that and the two boys stared at Mingyu’s television in silence.

“What the heck was that?!” Wonwoo yelled, partly outraged, but mostly shook after the fright of the unexpected prank.

Mingyu had almost half-expected it (as he’d had little faith in Junhui from the beginning.) It made sense that it would be this sort of thing that had turned Jihoon’s face white, as while the guy appeared very though and manly (in contrast to his built), Mingyu had observed that the shorter male was rather easily frightened.

Mingyu took another chip while Wonwoo rose from the bed with vigour.

“It was just a prank video?! God damn Junhui! Why would he tell us to watch this? Fuck, that _scared_ me!” He stared at the black picture of the video as if it had offended him specifically. He realised his own overreaction and became slightly flustered that he’d made a fool out of himself in front of Mingyu. (Like he didn’t find it completely adorable, but anyway.)

“Well, a–at least it’s kind of funny — right? … _Kind of?_ ” He wasn’t really asking and Mingyu hadn’t really been that surprised. He was more curious if Wonwoo was actually disapointed or simply shocked.

“… You know what, nevermind.” Wonwoo deflated, hugging the pillow he’d grabbed after Mingyu had hit him with it against his chest as he sank onto the floor and buried his face in it. “I’m too tired for this. I was tired to begin with. This isn’t what I was promised. Jun’s an asshole.” The pillow muffled his sullen complaint and Mingyu couldn’t hold in his laughter any longer at the pathetic sight of his friend in front of him.

It started with a chuckle, which managed to escape him before he was really aware, but then it slowly but steadily grew into full-blown laughter and Mingyu had to clutch at his stomach as the hilarity of the situation got to him.

“Now I get — why Junhui-ssi was so intent to get you to watch it—!” He managed between inhales and Wonwoo watched him as if he’d sprouted a second head. “You should message him and tell him that the second girl was your favourite.”

Wonwoo looked at him while Mingyu struggled to retake control of his body. When Mingyu seemed to be on his last snickers, he got up and climbed onto the bed beside him, letting the pillow lie forgotten on the floor. He leant into Mingyu’s personal space and looked at the unshed tears stuck in the corner of Mingyu’s eyes while Mingyu looked back at him, his eyes still glittering with high amusement.

“It’s good that you’re able to find this funny at least.” He commented dryly, but then he looked more seriously at Mingyu, tilting his head further down as too look up at him from a slightly lower angle. “But what are you going to do about me being excited right now?”

Mingyu looked into Wonwoo’s eyes and had to swallow carefully, all traces of laughter gone from his person now.

“You getting disappointed by the video have got nothing to do with me.” He tried, but his voice came out weaker than he would’ve liked and Wonwoo’s eyes were getting really dark now as he looked at Mingyu.

“… Do you want to do it?” Wonwoo leant closer to him, craning his neck and tracing his nose along the shell of Mingyu’s ear, inhaling the scent of Mingyu’s hair gingerly, as if he was something really exquisite and delightful. Mingyu’s pulse elevated until the vein in his neck centimetres from Wonwoo’s lips pulsed fiercly, and he held his breath, afraid that maybe Wonwoo would lean back again if he so much as moved.

Wonwoo did lean back, but not far, only to capture Mingyu’s gaze again, and his eyes were scalding, like boiling water threatening to burn Mingyu if he fell into them.

“I wasn’t really thinking about doing it today, but after you called me handsome in the store, and seeing you smile and laugh like you did just now… You’ve made me feel kind of restless.”

One of Wonwoo’s legs had ended up resting over Mingyu’s knee, and somehow managing to tear his eyes away from Wonwoo’s, Mingyu slowly looked down at the point of contact between them where he could feel the warmth of Wonwoo’s body seeping through their clothes and onto his thigh. The mood had changed and the temperature of his room had definitely gotten higher than it had been before Wonwoo had sat down beside him.

Mingyu slowly raised his gaze to meet Wonwoo’s again, carefully biting down on his bottom lip.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

“Oh —”

Wonwoo’s breath shuddered when Mingyu’s fingers ghosted over his dick, his pants and underwear discared on the bed besides them. Mingyu’s heart throbbed at the sound and he gingerly wrapped his fingers around Wonwoo’s soft shaft, feeling the bodypart twitch into life in his hand, starting to stiffen.

Wonwoo’s cheeks were hot and he looked at Mingyu sitting on his knees between his legs.

“I could…” He reached for his own dick, but Mingyu caught his wrist and stopped him before he got to touch himself, telling Wonwoo with his gaze that he wanted to be the one to do it. A little reluctanly Wonwoo retrieved his hand and laid back against the pillows while Mingyu undid his own pants and adjusted his position slightly so that he could align his own penis with Wonwoo’s like they’d first done in the art-room on that lunchbreak.

“Ah, that…” Wonwoo made to comment as he recognised what they were about to do but as Mingyu’s hand enveloped them and held them together he lost his ability to speak up and closed his eyes, his toes curling when Mingyu gave them a few languid strokes to test the angle.

His eyes traveled along the alluring expanse of the pale skin of Wonwoo’s exposed torso where his shirt had ridden up and Mingyu felt his mouth start to dry and his head start spinning slightly. His free hand smoothened across the skin and pushed Wonwoo’s shirt further up to unviel his two tinted nipples. Mingyu instantly liked them better than the girl’s on the video.

Wonwoo didn’t seem to mind, fingering along the outline of their now fully erect dicks in Mingyu’s grasp with clouded wonderment. His lips pulled into a wavering smile and a breathy chuckle escaped his lips.

“I was worried you wouldn’t get hard.” He admitted, probably thinking about the abrupt end to Junhui’s video, and Mingyu waited until Wonwoo glanced back up at him before he looked at him seriously.

“That would never happen.” He said, his voice sure and low, and Wonwoo stared with flushed cheeks as if surprised by Mingyu’s certainty before he offered a bleak smile.

“Ah… Sorry.” He pardoned himself and Mingyu dragged his thumb over Wonwoo’s head, preferring the gasp it pulled from his lips to his apology.

For some time, the only noises within Mingyu’s apartment came from the movement of their two bodies as Mingyu rolled their hips together or their lips whenever Wonwoo would gasp or moan quietly, biting back most of his noises, or when Mingyu would rarely groan. Mingyu’s pulse was beating loudly within his ears and he watched obsessively the curve of Wonwoo’s chest when he breathed or the arch of his back whenever Mingyu would pay attention to his slit.

The room had grown hot around them, and the two boys were completely engrossed in their own world of pleasure, neither noticing nor minding the thin air much.

Mingyu’s hand worked exceptionally, stroking them in a steady rhythm while smearing their leaked pre-come over their heads and shafts. Wonwoo trembled beneath him, his lips parted and his cheeks burning, the dark flush making him look almost feverish and unbelievably sexy in Mingyu’s mind.

“Nnh—! Ah…” After the particularly articulate moan, Wonwoo brought his arms up and hid his flushed face from Mingyu’s sight while Mingyu continued to grind their cocks together with firm and forcefull thrusts.

“Why —” Wonwoo’s voice broke on another moan, a groan and a gasp following shorly after as he jerked on the bed, his breath hitching and his dick throbbing in Mingyu’s grasp. “Why are you being so rough…?” Judging by Wonwoo’s body’s reaction, he didn’t really dislike it, and Mingyu disregarded giving him an answer since he didn’t know the reason for his frevor himself.

He was completely removed from his mind, all he could focus on through the mist in his head being Wonwoo’s hot body underneath his hands. He twisted his hand and devoured Wonwoo's squirming with his eyes, listening to the noises that rippled up and out of Wonwoo’s chest with wicked delightment, originating from the intoxicating knowledge that it was his touch that had rendered Wonwoo to the currently wrecked state he was in.

Mingyu completely adored him.

Even as he was looming over Wonwoo, grinding against him and touching his burning skin directly, Mingyu wanted to be closer, like their erotic ritual wasn’t nearly complete yet. He knew what the next step was, but he had never known when it would be fitting for them to try something more advanced.

Feeling the thick slickness under his palm, a thought invaded Mingyu’s mind, and he wanted to give it a try.

Wonwoo lowered his arms and looked at him when Mingyu ceased his ministrations to bring his other hand’s fingers to their stained dicks. His cock twitched under Mingyu’s touch and he watched silently and intently while Mingyu coated his other fingers with thei pre-come, already kind of expecting what he rightfully suspected was coming after as Mingyu retreived his hand again and watched Wonwoo’s expression keenly for any sign of protest while his hand slid downwards to the tight muscle of Wonwoo’s entrance.

Since he wasn’t met by any form of resistance, Mingyu went ahead and slowly pushed the tip of his finger against the ring, marveling when it slipped past the muscle and into the heat of Wonwoo’s body, Mingyu’s mind going frighteningly blank at the new and unfamiliar sensation.

“Ah—!” Wonwoo’s body jerked rather strongly and his arms flew back over his face, the flush that had stained his cheeks having begun to crawl down his neck and over his chest. He clenched his hands into fists and bit down on his bottom lip to keep himself as quiet as possible while Mingyu’s finger mindfully penetrated him.

“Nnh — Uwah…! Ngh… Ah—!” No matter his efforts, noises kept spilling out of him and Wonwoo’s entire body was shaking. “I’m… sorry if my voice is weird… Nh…” He whimpered, embarrassed, and Mingyu’s chest swelled, his heart practically aching from the furious exercise it was getting, as well as from something else, like that thing he refused to put a name on that he felt whenever he was around Wonwoo as he gazed down at the precious male on the matress beneath him.

He remembered reading somewhere that doing this might hurt the one on the receiving end, and carefully he bent down and placed a tender kiss to one of Wonwoo’s wrists in apology for possibly hurting him.

He could feel Wonwoo’s insides pulse hotly around his finger, occassionally tightening, and the sensation was almost driving Mingyu mad with desire, but he forced himself to remain in control. Maybe one day, he could feel that heat fully envelop and squeeze around his dick (just thinking of the possibility almost had Mingyu see white) but for today, Mingyu just wanted to make Wonwoo feel good, and he shoved his own raging cravings to the very back of his mind and released a shuddering exhale.

Slowly, deliberately carefully, Mingyu begun to move his finger, starting by massaging the insides of Wonwoo’s hole until his entrance relaxed more around him and allowed him a little more mobility. Mingyu then started to move his other hand around their neglected dicks again, dragging out every pump and watching Wonwoo’s reaction as he matched the pace to that of his finger wihtdrawing from and pushing back into him.

Catching sight of Wonwoo’s expression from a gap between his arms, his eyes determinedly squeezed shut and his lips pressed tightly together, even the tip of his ears adoring the red hue of his flushed skin, Mingyu found himself thinking that Wonwoo was extremely beautiful displayed like that, shuddering, gasping, welcoming.

Mingyu wanted to hold him tightly and never let him go.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

Wonwoo took the napkins offered to him by Mingyu and started to wipe their mixed come from his stomach, his legs feeling like jelly and his head feeling light as air in the aftermath of his climax. Again, Mingyu had showed him something he’d never thought about or considered doing before that had ended up feeling exceedingly incredible.

Thinking about it now afterwards made Wonwoo’s face feel warm and something tight squeeze within his chest as he watched Mingyu come back to the bed from the sink where he’d washed off his hands. Wonwoo pulled on his underwear, but threw his pants onto the floor before he rolled sideways and made space for Mingyu to join him on the bed.

They didn’t say anything as they climbed under the covers and cuddled close together, their legs entagling and their noses ending up brushing against each other as they faced one another on the mattress. Wonwoo closed his eyes and happily inhaled Mingyu’s scent, squirming slightly in delight as he felt nothing but one hundred percent good in that moment, lying there together with Mingyu, after another great orgasm. He was utterly content with everything.

“Wonwoo.”

He uncovered his eyes and looked into Mingyu’s warm, brown, big irises just a couple of centimetres away from his, offering a kind smile as he caught the hesitance within them. Mingyu’s eyes flickered between his for a moment, and then a small crease formed between his eyebrows, and his lips turned downwards in a soft frown.

“I—” The word hung in the air between them, but Mingyu never continued on what he was about to say, looking troubled as he lay there across from Wonwoo in the weak light of his golv-lamp beside the bed.

Wonwoo looked at the poorly concealed trace of agony flashing through the deep caramel orbs of Mingyu’s eyes and felt pity for the boy across from him. He knew that Mingyu was thinking about complicated things again, and he felt sorry that Mingyu had such difficulty expressing some things to him.

Wishing to make Mingyu feel better, Wonwoo inched forwards and pressed his lips over Mingyu’s for a soft, sweet kiss.

“Let’s go to sleep. Okay?” He murmured against Mingyu’s mouth and got a tired nod in reply.

Wonwoo watched over Mingyu’s vulnerable expression long after the other had fallen asleep, thinking about how gorgeous it looked in those rare moments when Mingyu smiled genuinely.

One day, Wonwoo would like for Mingyu to tell him exactly what it was that troubled him so.

By the time the sun rose, Wonwoo had finally managed to fall asleep too.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

When Mingyu woke up later that morning, Wonwoo’s arms had ended up securely wrapped around him. Blinking in the embrace, Mingyu soon slowly closed his eyes again and reveled in the familiar warmth of Wonwoo’s body for as long as the moment lasted.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N:
> 
> Merry X-mas everyone~ ♡ ㅋㅋㅋㅋ
> 
> First we follow Wonwoo's P.O.V., then Mingyu's P.O.V., back to Wonwoo, to finish with Mingyu... Haha sorry for the mess, but it'll pretty much be like this from now on... I said in the last chapter that we'll follow Mingyu mostly, but looking over the next chapter I realised that I lied lmao. We'll follow them equally from now on, OK? OK.
> 
> Also, I can't believe I wrote that... Ugh, porn. I cannot. Smut? Everyday. Porn? *hides in corner and covers eyes while screaming* I'm embarrassed... Haha
> 
> I know I said I wouldn't update but I changed my mind BECAUSE we reached a milestone!! Both here and on Asianfanfics this story has reached over 1000hits/views!! That makes me so unbeliavably happy, I almost (definitely) get emotional ㅠㅠ Thank you so, so much, really~ ㅠㅠ Knowing that so many are reading this makes me want to work even harder and update faster – and so, this is a christmas present for you guys!! ♡ It's a present to yourselves from yourselves, lmao~
> 
> But really, I am immensely happy and grateful for your support.
> 
> Thank you. 
> 
>  
> 
> ✧
> 
>  
> 
> As you've all noticed, both covers of Mingyu and Wonwoo have their own corresponding colours, and their own corresponding flowers as well, and actually there's a thought behind all of that.
> 
> Mingyu's flower is a Pink Camellia and it stands for longing – like Mingyu longs for Wonwoo. In Korea the Camellias flower is also a symbol of faithfulness and longevity.
> 
> Wonwoo's flower is a Blue Hydrangea. Hydrangea is a flower of diverse meanings. It can stand for 'heartfelt and honest emotions of any kind', 'developing a deeper understanding between two people' — which I thought suited Mingyu and Wonwoo's relationship to one another pretty well — but it can also stand for 'heartlessness and acting without thinking about the feelings of another'. A Blue Hydrangea is most commonly connected to frigidity, turning fown a romantic proposal, asking for forgiveness, and expressing regret.
> 
>  
> 
> ✧
> 
>  
> 
> So, there's some interesting facts for you to think about. I keep these flowers and meanings of them in mind as I write, and now you can too as you read ~
> 
> All well wishes to you, wherever you are this holiday and to whomever you've chosen to spend it with. 
> 
> ♡♡♡


	7. Crumbling, breaking, we're the pieces that never fit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trouble in the in-between

✧ ✧ ✧

 

“Uh-huh. No. Sure. Well, that’s fine. Yeah? I see… Hm? Yeah, I’m at home.” Wonwoo said into his phone, kicking at a pebble in front of his feet where he was sat on the stone steps of a stair leading into a great, nice building behind him. One could tell it was some sort of important, official building from its exterior. White marble and dark doors. Super fancy.

“I’m not really doing anything at the moment. Nah, not today. I’m going to help Bohyuk with his summer’s homework later. I know. But I could come over tomorrow?” Wonwoo tilted his head back and squinted at the sun glaring high in the blue sky. “Yeah. Talk to you later, then. Bye, bye~!”

He hung up and exhaled, taking to playing with his phone as he waited for S.coups to show up to their agreed upon meeting place while humming a cheerful tune.

Summer vaccation had started, and while Wonwoo kept getting reminded by his friends that they were getting older and would sooner than they thought start attending their last year of highschool and therefore had to fully enjoy their last vaccation of youth (they were honestly a little overdramatic in his opinion) he spent his days lazing about and taking it easy with Mingyu or in his room. He’d grown bored of his magazines at home and when his mother had thrown him out of the house, he’d figured he’d might as well get in touch with his hyung again, if for nothing else, just to kill some time.

“Ah, shoot!” He missed his chance to dodge and lost a life in his game, completely invested in the small characters on the screen.

“Excuse me.”

Wonwoo looked over his shoulder at the pleasantly melodic but unfamiliar voice and found himself looking up at a well-suited and very attractive young man. His face wasn’t as much handsome as it was pretty, and for a second Wonwoo found himself at a loss for words at the sight of the male with foreign characteristics in his features.

The man smiled kindly at him, the soft curve of his lips gentle and appealing.

“Would you mind moving aside a little?” His voice was pleasant and bright, like the sound of one of the many wind chimes hung outside the houses now that summer had arrived, and Wonwoo instantly startled into life.

“Uh — Y-yeah, sure.” He moved his backpack aside and shuffled on the steps to allow the man passage, and the male gave him another warm look along with a small bow.

“Thank you.” He said and moved past him, and Wonwoo tilted his head slightly in parting, wondering what sort of position the guy had and what he worked with, coming out of the building Wonwoo was sat in front of.

He returned his attention to the game to find that he had died and would have to restart, which he did with a small sigh, immersing himself in his phone once more. Had he not gotten distracted he would’ve noticed that the man had paused and turned back to look at him properly.

“… I’m sorry,” Wonwoo looked up at the musical voice addressing him again and watched the guy with the feline eyes as he took a careful step towards him. “I hope you don’t mind me asking, but what are you doing sitting in a place like this?”

His voice was far from unkind or accusing, yet Wonwoo got the feeling that maybe he wasn’t allowed to sit on the stairs.

“I’m waiting for someone.” He replied earnestly, putting his phone into his bag. “But if it’s troublesome, maybe I should…”

“Yes, perhaps that’d be good.” The stranger nodded his head faintly, his eyebrows gently drawing together on his forehead to form a soft frown, as if he felt apologetic for making Wonwoo feel unwelcome and leave even though he hadn’t been particularly rude, which made Wonwoo think that he must be a very kind hearted person.

But as Wonwoo stood and slung his bag over his shoulder, the other’s eyes didn’t leave him, and just as he was about to bid his farewell and exscuse his disturbance, the stranger parted his lips and spoke before him.

“Uhm, pardon me again, but could it be that you’re the rumoured one that the tops have been interested in?” He asked and Wonwoo gave him a confused look.

“Tops…?” He asked the gentle-faced man, and for some reason his mind slipped to S.coups-hyung’s face for a split second. “Is this about S.coups-hyung?” He found himself trying to recall if the other had ever mentioned a word such as ‘top’ before and if perhaps S.coups work involved far more people than he had thought?

The stranger straightened up, looking mildly intruiged by Wonwoo and moved in to get a closer look at his face.

“You really are.” He sounded marvelled at the fact and Wonwoo’s confusion would have risen had he not been distracted by the pleasant and distinct citrus smell coming from the man in front of him. “Wait… S.coups-hyung? Why do you refer to him like that?” The stranger asked, seemingly amused and Wonwoo let his eyes slid across the man’s charming face.

 _This scent… is one that I like_ , he thought in the back of his mind.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

Wonwoo liked the sound of the man’s laughter. It was bright and melodious and not in the slightest bit annoying or overzealous. Just like the man himself, it was almost graceful.

“Is that so?” The man smiled behind his knuckles, taking to stirring his coffee with the spoon that had accompanied the saucet when the waitress had served it to him. “I thought I wouldn’t understand how highschoolers today are, but is that accurate?”

The way the male spoke made Wonwoo think that he must be at least a couple of years older than him, although his appearance was almost as youthful as Wonwoo’s own.

Wonwoo nodded his head, smiling at the guy with honesty.

“It is!” He said, having told a story of when Soonyoung and Junhui had ushered a dare between the third year classes at their school, resulting in a massive competition of who could stack the most benches atop each other in their homeroom before the teacher arrived and caught them. It had been a hilarious week of competition for the students. Not so much for the school faculty, perhaps. “Things like that are kind of common, pranks and such. I’m really good at them, too. Then people took pictures to show how far they got before the teacher came. Wanna see? Here. This was ours.”

Wonwoo fished out the picture from his gallery and proudly showed the man the image on his phone of Junhui, Soonyoung, Jihoon as well as some other guys from their class proudly posing in front of their creation (minus Jihoon, of course. He did not consent to the reconstruction of their classroom, and he did not _pose_. He just crossed his arms and rolled his eyes at Wonwoo through the lense that time.) Unfortunately they’d lost to class 3-2, but that was only because their teacher was known for arriving late everyday, so it weather it was a fair win was in debate amongst the classes.

“Wow, how confident.” The man laughed sweetly once more, smiling at the picture that Wonwoo showed him. He gingerly plucked the phone from Wonwoo’s grasp and looked more closely at it. “Are these your classmates?” He asked, pointing to the figures on the screen.

Wonwoo nodded, smiling as he followed the stranger’s finger on his phone.

“Yup.” He laughed.

“Only guys?” The man pointed out, phrasing the sentence as a question as he handed Wonwoo’s phone back, arching one of his eyebrows elegantly on his forehead as he looked into Wonwoo’s eyes.

“Well, yeah. It’s an all-boys school.” Wonwoo replied, putting his phone back into his pocket and taking a sip from his bubble-tea on the table between them. The man’s smile widened and his eyes glinted mysteriously as he nodded his head slightly.

“ _Ah._ I see.” He said understandingly, as if that small piece of information had given him a small treat that pleased him and Wonwoo narrowed his eyes at him playfully.

“What’s with that ‘ah’?” He asked, straightening up in his chair, however he asked in a playfull manner and didn’t really expect a reply. “It’s definitely a shame that we don’t have any girls, but it’s still really fun being with the guys, so I don’t mind at all. I’m having a lot of fun, actually.”

“You seem like you’d be popular.” The stranger commented simply, offering an easy smile and Wonwoo looked at him in surprise. “I’m guessing you’re loved a lot by your friends?” The man asked and a grin settled on Wonwoo’s face.

“You get it?” He exclaimed with a laugh. He thought of his friends and of Mingyu and smiled to himself. “I guess you could say that. I’ve got people who look after me and people who say that I’m easy to get along with. Sometimes I think I’m a little too approachable because people I don’t remember come up and talk to me like I know them and things quickly become really awkward when I can’t recall their name.”

This pulled another beautiful laugh from the stranger and Wonwoo smiled, not at all minding spending his time with this person.

He blinked.

_The time._

Quickly, Wonwoo checked the digits on his phone, seeing that they were way past the hour he was supposed to have met with S.coups-hyung and he pulled a face.

“The time. I forgot.” He observed aloud and the other male glanced at him from under his lashes.

“Oh, right. You were waiting for someone, weren’t you? I’m sorry for distracting you with conversation and dragging you away to a café.”

Wonwoo shook his head, pocketing his phone and giving the other a smile.

“It’s fine! I had a good time. Thank you for treating me.” He bowed his head respectfully but the other shook his hand, rejecting the formal gesture with a sweet smile.

“No, no.” He chuckled delightfully. “It was my pleasure, really.”

A few minutes later they were standing outside the cozy café the stranger had lead Wonwoo to and bidding their farewells after their unintentional but enjoyable encounter. Even though the other had rejected the formality inside the café, Wonwoo felt obliged to bow to the older now.

“Thank you very much.” He said, grateful for the drink the other had bought for him. As he raised his head, the other suddenly stuck out a small, rectangular slip of paper towards him and Wonwoo looked at it hesitantly.

“Here.” The gentle man said, holding it out for him to take. “It’s my business card.” He said and Wonwoo accepted the card curiously, looking at the neatly printed logo of a begonia flower, turning it over in his hand and reading the golden text on the backside.

“Only your name and number?” He voiced his question as he found it missed any company name and the male shook his head with a soft chuckle.

“I use a different card for my work. That one’s just for my contact info.” He explained with gentle eyes. “Feel free to call me anytime.”

Wonwoo kept staring at the tiny paper in his hands, feeling a small smile tug at his lips.

“This is the first time anyone has given me their business card.” His eyes lingered on the name printed in the fine, golden letters on the backside. The man watched him with a smile.

“It’s Joshua.” He spoke the name on the card and Wonwoo’s lips tilted somewhat, wondering if it truthfully was the male’s real name. He did have a somewhat foreign look, like Wonwoo had noticed from the beginning, but still he felt sceptical.

He looked up and gave a smile anyway, not giving away his doubt about the other’s honesty. He was a nice guy, so Wonwoo didn’t think there was much to it.

“I’m Wonwoo. Jeon Wonwoo.” He introduced himself, finding it slightly funny that they hadn’t exchanged their name’s before they’d grabbed coffee together. They were kind of doing things backwards. Joshua gave him another of his beautiful smiles, seemingly satisfied after having gotten Wonwoo’s name.

“Wonwoo-ya.” He called, and Wonwoo for some reason liked it when his name rolled of the other’s tongue. “Contact me some time, okay?” Joshua said, looking into his eyes, and then after another half minute and a proper goodbye they parted ways.

Wonwoo kept the card in his hand so that he could admire it as he walked. He found it funny that such an unplanned meeting could end up feeling like such a good thing, and he considered himself a lucky person for being surrounded by so many kind people. Who would have thought he’d end up making a new friend just like that? Joshua had also been such a nice person, and Wonwoo was already certain that he would contact him. It was summer, he liked making new friends, and he had time to kill. Of course he’d call him. He stared at the yellow begonia and smiled to himself.

“That—” The sudden, familiar voice startled Wonwoo and he looked up to find S.coups leaning against the wall of a building in the sidestreet he’d been about to pass by. Seeing his hyung, Wonwoo started to smile.

“Hyung—”

“Hand it over to me.” Wonwoo stared at him and then followed S.coups sharp gaze to the businesscard in his grasp, feeling puzzled by the edgy tone of the older’s voice. Wonwoo looked back to his hyung and eyed the baseballcap he had pulled over his hair and the dark hoodie that was drawn around his neck. He pursed his lips.

“What’s wrong?” He asked, sensing that S.coups wasn’t currently in his best mood, which concerned him slightly as the other was usually very warm and cheerful during their encounters. “Joshua-ssi is an aquaintence of yours, right?” At least, Joshua had seemed to know S.coups, and judging by the look in S.coups, he knew the other as well.

S.coups didn’t bother to reply, and Wonwoo slowly narrowed his eyes as he realised something.

“… What are you doing here, hyung? This wasn’t our meeting place.” He pointed out and S.coups looked at him with an exhasperated expression, tilting his head to the side.

“I followed you from the office, but I didn’t want to approach you while you were with that guy.” He explained, and Wonwoo got a feeling that whatever S.coup’s business with Joshua was, they weren’t exactly on great terms. It made him wonder about what kind of world S.coup’s really belonged to for the second time in the same day.

S.coups got up from the wall and stepped up to him, holding his hand out and waiting for Wonwoo to give him the card he was still holding. Wonwoo cast a glance at the hand and then looked back into his hyung’s eyes.

“He gave it to me.” S.coups shrugged lazily and met his gaze evenly.

“Come on, Wonwoo-ya. You’re a good boy.” Wonwoo stared at S.coups for a little while longer before he reluctantly gave up the pretty card and handed it over into S.coup’s waiting hand, which immidiatedly pocketed the slip of paper.

“Thank you.” S.coups said, sounding relieved, starting to relax slightly and revert back into the kind and warm personality Wonwoo knew him as.

Looking at Wonwoo’s expression, S.coups frowned slightly.

“I’m sorry. Don’t think badly of me.” He laid a hand on Wonwoo’s shoulder. Then his lips pulled into a smirk and he sqeezed Wonwoo’s bicep playfully, his ashy eyes glinting mischieviously as he met Wonwoo’s gaze. “Now come on. I’ve planned something really fun for us tonight.”

Although still feeling slighty depressed because he got robbed of his first-ever businesscard, Wonwoo allowed S.coups words to put a bleak smile on his face and he followed him into the city, ignoring the small voice in the back of his head that reminded him that Mingyu wouldn’t be happy with him if he ever found out that Wonwoo had hung out with his hyung again.

Well, no problem, really. Mingyu just never had to find out. Easy as pie.

Wonwoo chose to ignore the small simmering feeling of guilt in the back of his head as well.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

It was early morning when Wonwoo finally fell into his bed, still slightly buzzed from the substances S.coups had given him, but he was very, very content. He laid there, watching the patterns and colours shift and twist on the ceiling above his bed for a little while with a lazy grin on his face and allowed himself to just be for a minute or two, lovig the tingling sensation in his body and the relaxed state of his muscles. He then dug through his pockets for his phone and after several attempts he managed to get it out, squinting at the bright light of the screen when it lit up and he flipped through his list of contacts.

He accidentally scrolled too far and had to go back to the name he’d been looking for, eyes reading the numbers off of the screen a couple of times before he felt a triumphant grin start to pull at his face.

After he’d parted with Joshua, before he’d run into S.coups, Wonwoo had entered the digits of the businesscard into his phone.

  
**Joshua Hong**  
 

 **[    Call Contact    ]                [  Send Message  ]**  
 

Sometimes, Wonwoo considered himself quite the genious.

After he’d sent away a text, Wonwoo justified to his minor sense of guilt that S.coups hadn’t technically told him that he wasn’t allowed to _meet_ Joshua, and in Wonwoo’s book, that meant he was free to do however he liked.

If you wanted to get to know someone, the only way was to properly communicate with them yourself, after all.

Feeling clever and smart and high, Wonwoo rolled over and burried his face in his pillow, not bothering to get out of his clothes as he drifted off to sleep with a smile playing across his lips.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

“Mingyu, let’s play~”

If it had been a different kind of circumstance, one where Wonwoo perhaps had intended on joining Mingyu in his bed rather than get him out of it, hearing those words whispered into his ears woud’ve made Mingyu a whole lot happier. But Wonwoo wasn’t there to give him a happy morning, as it seemed. Instead he was there to remind Mingyu that he had to force Wonwoo to return the key he still unlawfully kept in his possesion.

As he’d been sleeping when Wonwoo had barged in and started bothering him, Mingyu hadn’t really been listening to everything Wonwoo had been saying. He did catch that Wonwoo was going to meet up with a new friend, although he wasn’t quite sure why that had anything to do with him.

“On the phone they said I could bring a good friend if I wanted, so I thought that I should take Mingyu with me.” Wonwoo was draped across Mingyu’s figure, smothering him on the bed as he updated him on the situation with a smile. “When I told them about you, they said ‘introduce us’. So we’re going together, okay?”

When Mingyu still hadn’t opened his eyes and didn’t give much of a reply, Wonwoo slapped him across the forehead.

“ _Hello_ , is anyone there? Time to wake up, Mingyu.”

Some time later, while Mingyu pulled a shirt over his head, Wonwoo was already putting his shoes back on.

“You sleep so much one might think you weren’t nurtured properly.” He commented from Mingyu’s small hall and Mingyu frowned at him, already feeling grumpy for being dragged out of his apartment because of one of Wonwoo’s spontaneous dates. (He still didn’t see why he had to come along, but Wonwoo kept insisting and bothering him, so in the end he wasn’t left much of a choice.)

“…No matter who we’re going to see, it’s not like we’re going to become friends.” Mingyu muttered to himself, but of course Wonwoo heard him.

“What? Why not?” He asked coming over to envelop Mingyu in a sideways hug, blowing air into his ear and giving him goosebumps, laughing and clinging to him harder when Mingyu tried to shove him away. “Come on. It’ll be fun! Besides, you could do with some more friends, you know? This is a chance for you to make some more.”

Mingyu looked at Wonwoo’s back when he headed back towards the door.

 _Friends_. His mind lingered on the word.

Mingyu didn’t think that he needed any.

“Stop wasting time or I’ll leave you behind!” Wonwoo said, sticking his head back into the apartment, and Mingyu wished that he actually would. Sighing, he pulled on a pair of jeans before he reluctantly followed Wonwoo into the nice summer day.

He joined Wonwoo on the sidewalk and gave the bag the other had in his possession a weird look.

“Curious what’s in it?” Wonwoo grinned when he caught Mingyu glancing at it, lifting the plasticbag up to dangle it in the air at face-height. “I’m bringing some jelly as a gift.”

Mingyu made a face and Wonwoo observed him.

“Even if you make that face, you won’t get any! It’s a gift.”

“I don’t want it…” Mingyu grumbled and they went on their way.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

“We’re here.”

Before Wonwoo could cross the street to the looming building in front of them, Mingyu grabbed him by the collar of his neck and held him back, causing the other to gag.

“Ack— Mingyu, wai— My shirt will stretch!” Wonwoo struggled in Mingyu’s grip but the other didn’t let him go, eyening the large house in front of them suspiciously. Just by looking at it, Mingyu got the creeps. (Not that it was run-down or dirty or anything, just… He didn’t like it.)

“We’re here? Something about this place is weird.” He said, finally letting Wonwoo go when the other kicked him in the shin. “It says authorized personnel only.”

“Where? Stop making things up!” Wonwoo sniffed at him, shoving his phone into Mingyu’s face. “Can’t you see the GPS results?”

“Give it to me.” Mingyu quickly snatched the phone from Wonwoo’s hand under loud protest and a small struggle ensued between the two boys as they fought over the right to the device.

They didn’t notice the man in a suit approaching them until the male cleared his throat a couple of steps away, sucessfully drawing their attention to him as both Mingyu and Wonwoo ceased their brawl to whip their heads in his direction.

“Are you Hong-nim’s aquaintances?” The kind-looking man asked. “I was given the task of picking you up.”

Still with Mingyu’s hand in his shirt, Wonwoo snatched his phone back and gave his friend a smug, tilted smirk.

“See?” He poked at Mingyu’s face before he turned around and confirmed to the man that they were the guests Hong had been waiting for and the male responded with a smile and saying that he would escort them if they followed ‘right along this way.’

Mingyu’s gut told him not to go, but Wonwoo was already following the man, completely unfazed by the strangeness of the situation and oblivious to Mingyu’s reluctance.

When he noticed that Mingyu hadn’t followed, he turned around and looked questioningly at Mingyu’s expression.

“What’s wrong?” He asked, but Mingyu couldn’t reply, because he didn’t really know how to express the bad vibes he was getting form this place.

Part of him wondered if this was how Wonwoo got aquainted with so many people, if he did things like this everytime he made a new friend, but another part of Mingyu refused to believe that Wonwoo would be so naïve to actually get himself into any dangerous situations. Maybe Mingyu was just being paranoid about the whole situation, but even as he thought that, Mingyu still didn’t want to go.

Wonwoo noticed his hesistance and gave him a tentative tilt of the head.

“If you’re not going to come, I’ll leave you behind.” He said, feigning a pout, and Mingyu frowned.

He really didn’t want to go, but leaving Wonwoo to go in on his own when Mingyu’s gut was wrenching in anxiousness wasn’t an option.

Steeling his resolve, Mingyu joined Wonwoo and their escort, ignoring the irritating hum of satisfaction his friend made when he came up to his side.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

They were brought into the building, passing a well-decorated entrance and going through a corridor before they were left in a spacious room with three, nice couches circling a big coffee table in the middle. There were drapes in crimson red framing the windows and a vase on a small table in the corner. Mingyu found the room very strange.

Their escort left them to go fetch this Hong-nim, and it was only a few minutes before the man in question strode through the doors. He was very handsome, Mingyu noted, with gentle features, warm eyes and an almost feline smile, wearing a nicely fitted suit that strengthened his dapper appearance. Upon seeing Wonwoo smile and greet the man like they were already close friends, Mingyu decided that he greatly disliked him.

He nodded his head when Wonwoo introduced them — Joshua hong was the classy man’s name — and took to observing the man warily while the other two kept conversation rolling.

“Here!” Wonwoo presented the cutely wrapped box containing the jelly he’d brought as a gift, grinning at the older man who looked surprised by his thoughtfullness. “Since you said you liked sweets.”

“You remembered? How considerate and kind of you.” Joshua had a very sweet laugh. “You can’t have a lot of money, considering you’re only a high school student.” Wonwoo looked very pleased when Joshua accepted his gift and retook his place besides Mingyu on the couch.

Joshua looked at the package with delightment before he looked up at them again in thought.

“I invited you to this kind of place, but we don’t really have a lot to serve kids.” Mingyu wondered what Joshua meant by that, finding his choice of wording peculiar, but when he glanced at Wonwoo the other didn’t seem to have noticed at all. “I did prepare some cake, but since you so nicely brought jelly I’m a little torn. Which would you like to have?” Joshua smiled at them and Wonwoo looked happy to hear there was cake for them as well.

“Both!” He quickly answered, almot bouncing in his seat before he looked to Mingyu. “Right?” He looked for agreement he didn’t receive. Mingyu doubted he’d have any of it anyway, as he still didn’t fancy sweets.

“That sounds good.” Joshua smiled. “We have plenty of black tea. Do we have any green or red tea?” He turned to ask the man who ahd escorted them to the room, whom quickly bowed upon being adressed.

“I’ll go check.”

“Tea!” Wonwoo exclaimed getting up before hesitating and looking to Joshua with a shy smile. “Is it okay if I go with him and have a look? I wanna pick flavour myself.”

“Sure, go ahead.” Joshua asnwered airily and Mingyu watched them exchange cute smiles with each other. “Could you pick one for me as well?” Joshua met Wonwoo’s eye and Wonwoo’s smile widened.

“Sure.” And then he was gone, leaving Mingyu and Joshua alone in the room where silence settled in between the four walls.

Mingyu supposed he should’ve felt awkward, but mostly he felt like he didn’t have anything to say to the man standing across the table from him, watching him keenly.

“It’s okay for you to stay here.” The man said, as if Mingyu needed his permission to do anything in this house and Mingyu stared at the table.

Joshua walked over to the couch on Mingyu’s right and sat down with a breathy sigh, elegantly crossing his legs before he put his fingers to his chin and looked at Mingyu’s profile as if he was assessing him. It gave Mingyu the creeps.

“Wonwoo-ya’s liveliness is nice, huh. Is he always this energetic?” He asked and Mingyu still wouldn’t look at him.

“Pretty much.” He answered tersly, doing his best not to sound hostile towards the stranger. He silently cursed Wonwoo inside his head for dragging him there and then abandoning him in the room with the man he didn’t want to get to know. What a great friend he was.

“Did he force you into coming today?”

Joshua’s question had Mingyu finally look at him, and the other was giving him that soft smile, tapping his finger against his cheekbone.

“You’ve had a stern look for a while. Are you nervous? There’s no reason to be.” He assured charmingly and Mingyu averted his gaze again, biting the inside of his cheek.

“Not really. My face is usually like this.” He responded, and a pause followed, which made Mingyu wonder if Joshua was disapointed in him.

“On the phone when Wonwoo-ya said ‘I’m bringing Mingyu’, he said it very cheerfully. Adoringly, almost.” Joshua’s voice had darkened, not into anything unpleasant, just something much smoother and more velvety than the bright voice Mingyu had heard from him so far. Something more mature. The man’s eyes were focused on Mingyu, and his smile seemed plastered to his face, making Mingyu question its genuinety. “I was certain he would be bringing a girl with him.”

Migyu looked at Joshua and pressed his lips together. He wasn’t sure what to make of what the other said, what to think about it. Instead he forced himself to focus on figuring out what reason the other had for telling him this in the first place.

Joshua’s eyes squinted along with his smile, which widened.

“Or maybe, you are a girl?”

Mingyu stared at him.

“Do you even like sweets?” Joshua laughed at Mingyu’s expression while the younger tightened his fists. “I’m just kidding.”

Mingyu lowered his head and stared into his lap, fighting the seething anger starting to boil within him, directed towards the other male.

“Is it fun playing around with kids like us?” He bit out, his imagination running wild with suggestions on what kind of business the man beside him could be involved in that triggered the alarms inside of his head. Joshua’s smile still didn’t drop from his face even as he regarded Mingyu.

“Don’t make such a scary face.” He said steadily, like an order, and Mingyu pressed his teeth together, deciding that not only did he dislike this man — he definitely despised him.

“There’s no reason for you to be so worried.” Joshua leant forwards in his seat, a hand coming up to ghost over Mingyu’s jaw. Cupping Mingyu’s chin between his finger and thumb, Joshua tilted his head and met Mingyu’s gaze, his eyes glinting darkly at him as he smiled mysteriously. “If I were you, I’d be more worried about the issues between you and him.”

Mingyu pulled back as if the other’s touch had burnt him and Joshua laughed at his reaction, leaning back from Mingyu’s glare.

“My bad.” He apologised ingenuinely, looking very pleased with himself. “If you’re going to act so straightforwardly hostile, I’ll want to tease you.” Mingyu watched the other get up onto his feet again, fleeting around in the room as he talked. “But it’s truly just mere interest that I have in Wonwoo-ya. I just wish to befriend him. He’s an intruiging boy. It’s clear from looking at him that he’s just a kid, but yet he’s so unafraid of the world.”

Mingyu picked up on another voice, dulled, like it came from someone talking in the next room over, and he frowned slightly as he looked to the wall he’d heard the noise come through.

“Even his innocent way of speaking is very likable. You end up feeling drawn to him and wanting to be around him.” Joshua stopped his pacing and looked at Mingyu once more, tilting his eyes back and looking at him down his nose with a gaze suddenly feeling very chilly as they bore into Mingyu’s eyes.

“Weren’t you the same at first as well?” He asked.

However, Mingyu never got to reply because suddenly a shrill scream sounded, soon followed by loud, bombosterous laughter, and then the door to the room where Joshua and Mingyu were at was torn open and a half-naked man covered in tattoos came through the doorway, wiping the sweat off his flushed face while the laughter continued to reverbate in the hallway behind him.

“Oh, a guest.” He observed cleverly when he spotted the startled boy on the couch. Mingyu was sure the voice of the person who screamed had belonged to a woman, and the unease that had been crawling underneath his skin now tore through his chest, making his heart beat loudly in his ears as he held his breath and stared at the stranger that had entered.

Joshua looked unfazed by the entrance.

“So you were here.” He spoke to the male. “Don’t come out looking like that. And I told you not to use that room.” He lectured the man strictly and gestured for him to leave them alone again, which the man did without any question, although he looked like the type to pick a fight with anyone in Mingyu’s eyes, what with his shaved head and piercings.

“Try to be quiet over there.” Joshua asked and the man laughed at his superior.

“Yeah, yeah, sure. Sorry.” He said before Joshua closed the door behind him, once again returning the room to the stillness that had enveloped it before the ruccous of the patrons had disturbed it.

He turned around to Mingyu and offered another one of his soft, breezy smiles again.

“Sorry about the noise. Did it startle you?” Mingyu met the other’s scornful and amused gaze and felt the thread of his patience finally snap inside of him.

Just then the door opened again and Wonwoo returned balancing a tray with three cups and a can of boiled water in his hands.

“Easy~” He hummed to himself and Mingyu stood up in a rush. He had to get out of there. He didn’t want to stay a second longer with this man.

He bumped into Wonwoo’s elbow on his way towards the door and Wonwoo yelped as the china clattered on the tray.

“Wha— _Idiot_ , look out—”

Mingyu let the other catch a glimpse of his cross expression before he was out the door, leaving Wonwoo to stare confused after him.

“Eh? _Eh??_ What?”

Joshua scratched his chin, looking slightly perturbed (but not at all guilty) by Mingyu’s sudden departure while he hummed.

“Looks like he got mad. He overreacted.” He told Wonwoo who pushed the door open and stuck his head out into the corridor to look after Mingyu.

“What was that? Where are you going?” He called, but he received no reply. Quickly, he whipped around to face Joshua again, shoving the tray into the other’s hands with stressed fingers. “Uhm, I’m going to go get him. So, please.”

Joshua blinked, watching Wonwoo dash out the door to go after his friend.

“Mingyu, wait!”

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

“Mingyu.”

Wonwoo had caught up to the other outside, easily falling in line after his friend walking in a rapid pace, carefully observing the tense curve of Mingyu’s shoulders and feeling the irritation wash off of the other in waves as he kept walking. Wonwoo wasn’t exactly winded after the short sprint, but he did have to take a moment to swallow and inhale before he had enough air in his lungs to speak.

“Mingyu.” He called again, trying to sound calm and collected while he felt extremely confused with the other’s anger. “Leaving suddenly like that was really rude. What are you doing?”

“Going home.” Was Mingyu’s curt reply, and Wonwoo felt a sting in his chest at the other’s biting tone.

“Why?” He asked, quickening his step to catch up to Mingyu’s side, hoping to get a look of the other’s face when he caght up, but Mingyu picked up his pace as well, keeping Wonwoo from fully reaching him, much to Wonwoo’s frustration.

Quickly grabbing on to Mingyu’s sleeve as to not let the other leave him behind Wonwoo tugged at Mingyu to make him slow down.

“Did you get into a fight while I was gone?” He asked and tightened his grip when Mingyu tried to yank his arm free, not rewarding him with a reply, keeping a brisk pace while heading away from the building.

“Heeey.” Wonwoo called when he failed to get Mingyu to stop and talk to him. “Can you stop walking and tell me what’s wrong? Did something happen? Were you scared because he was a stranger?”

Mingyu had enough of Wonwoo’s questions and stopped suddenly almost causing Wonwoo to bump into his chest when he whipped around and tore his arm out of Wonwoo’s grasp.

“ _Would you_ stop _clinging to me?_ It’s annoying, so just stop!” Mingyu raised his voice, unfairly dishing out his frustration on Wonwoo who looked genuinely wounded by his cruel outburst. Mingyu made to turn away again, but Wonwoo gripped onto the back of his jacket and hindered him from leaving.

“ _Why?_ ” After having seen the grim expression on Mingyu’s face, there was no way Wonwoo could let go of him. He wanted to know what had tipped Mingyu off. He hated seeing Mingyu upset and he got anxious, his head spinning as he tried to figure out what he could do to make things better.

Mingyu dragged his hands over his face and exhaled slowly, trying to control his temper.

“Just let go of me.” He grunted. “Do what you want, you idiot.”

Wonwoo stared at his stiff back, worried and frightened that he would accidentally make things worse if he said or did the wrong thing in this situation.

“… Was it really that bad?” He finally whispered. Mingyu didn’t say anything, and after a while he felt Wonwoo gingerly pluck his fingers from the fabric of his jacket and let him go.

He was mad, although not really at Wonwoo, but at everything in general. Still he waited with his heart in his throat to see if there was anything Wonwoo had to say to him.

Wonwoo’s voice was soft when he finally spoke.

“What do you want me to do?”

 

 ✧ ✧ ✧

 

Joshua looked up from his tea when Wonwoo reappeared in the entrance.

“I’m here to get my things.”

Joshua didn’t seem surprised, his lips tweaking in a bemused smile.

“Is that so.” He said simply, standing up from the couch. “I’ll have them wrap up the cake, so at least bring it back with you. It’d be a shame if no one ate it, after all.” He smiled and Wonwoo nodded softly and grabbed his backpack.

“We’ll have tea another time.” Wonwoo paused and met Joshua’s kind gaze before he averted his own eyes, feeling guilty for what he was about to say.

“Actually…” He hesitated, swallowing around the lump that had taken shape inside his throat. “Mingyu really doesn’t like it, so… I won’t be coming here again. I’m sorry.” He offered weakly and Joshua blinked.

“I see.” He gave a sad smile and Wonwoo felt even worse for rejecting such a nice person. “It’s too bad we had only just been aquainted. I wanted to befriend you, but I guess it can’t be helped.”

When Wonwoo returned outside, Mingyu was sat on a bench in the shadow of a tree, waiting for him, and Wonwoo took a moment to look at the profile of his friend in the warm light of the setting sun.

Mingyu looked up from the ground when he heard Wonwoo approach him and their gazes met. Wonwoo paused briefly in front of him and tilted his head.

“Let’s go.” He said and Mingyu only waited a few seconds before he got up and followed after him down the street.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

“Don’t you at least want a taste?” Wonwoo looked up from the cake on the plate in front of him to Mingyu’s back that was facing him on the bed. Silence was all that greeted him and Wonwoo lost his own apetite. He couldn’t feel happy when Mingyu was like this, especially not when it felt as if the other’s bad mood was entirely his fault.

Wonwoo had no idea what had transpired between Joshua and Mingyu while he had been preparing tea in the small kitchen together with the other man, but he imagined something terrible must’ve gone down for Mingyu to be so shaken by the time he returned. He felt imensely guilty, and Mingyu’s tiny apartment wasn’t helping Wonwoo feel any less claustrophobic.

Staring at the untouched piece of cake, Wonwoo decided to tell Mingyu about the other thing that added onto his unease. His pulse picked up, but before he could change his mind and keep quiet about it, Wonwoo hurried to blurt the words out.

“I met up with S.coups-hyung.” He admitted, shame colouring his cheeks as he held his breath.

Mingyu didn’t move, and Wonwoo wondered if he was glad or not for that.

“… Why?” Mingyu’s voice sounded too controlled and calm to be genuine, and Wonwoo srhunk in on himself, finding it far more crippling to deal with a silently seething Mingyu than with an openly furious one.

The thing was that Wonwoo hadn’t really had any reason for it, other than that he’d been restless, which only made it kind of worse, and Wonwoo sighed, realising his best course of action was just to be honest with Mingyu, lest he ruin his day any further.

“I — I was bored, and Bohyuk was driving me up the wall at home. Junhui is on vacation right now and Jihoon is visiting family while Soonyoung is teaching summer classes for kids. I — I just… wanted to have some fun.”

Mingyu shifted on the bed, turning his head and propping it up with his arm so that he could look at Wonwoo over his shoulder and Wonwoo was relieved to see that Mingyu’s gaze was mostly exhasperated rather than mad.

“S.coups-hyung is a really good guy, Mingyu. He shows me interesting stuff, teaches me about things, like how to make more friends and what’s fun to do…”

Wonwoo crawled up to the bed and leant his arms on the edge of the matress, observing Mingyu from up close in silence. Mingyu’s face was unusually impassive and frankly it frightened Wonwoo a little. He leant over Mingyu and looked down at him. Mingyu blinked slowly, staring back up at him in silence.

Even if Wonwoo said all of those things, Mingyu wouldn’t suddenly like S.coups, and he hadn’t liked Joshua either, even though Wonwoo had thought he’d seemed like a really nice guy.

Wonwoo traced the patterns within Mingyu’s irises with his eyes and exhaled slowly.

“… It seems like you and I just look at things a bit differently.” He murmured before he placed a soft, tentative kiss against Mingyu’s lips. When Mingyu didn’t pull away, Wonwoo kissed him again, more firmly, and climbed onto the bed.

He remembered Mingyu’s expression from that time in the hallway in school when he’d proposed the idea of them getting drunk together, how unnerved and vexed Mingyu had looked, how hard his eyes had gotten and how brusque and shaken his tone had been when he hissed at him. At that time, when Wonwoo had promised not to see S.coups anymore, he’d meant it, because he really couldn’t stand seeing Mingyu make that sort of face.

Unlike what people thought, in a sense, Mingyu was fragile, and Wonwoo knew that he had to look after the other. He wanted to take care of Mingyu and protect him, but sometimes it was hard because Mingyu almost never told Wonwoo when he was upset or when things bothered him, but with S.coups he had told him, and yet Wonwoo had broken his promise and failed to take Mingyu’s feelings into consideration, and he regretted that now.

Again, even though it hadn’t been his intention, it seemed as if Wonwoo had hurt Mingyu, and he kissed Mingyu over and over in hopes that it would make it up to him. Wonwoo admitted he could be careless and oblivious at times, but he could also be preceptive, especially when it came to his own emotions, and he knew that his feelings regarding Mingyu were genuine. He just wanted Mingyu to be happy.

Wonwoo hovered over Mingyu, his arms on either side of Mingyu’s head while one of his knees had settled between Mingyu’s legs as they kissed each other. One of Mingyu’s hands came up to drag along Wonwoo’s side, and he tilted his head into the kiss, making so that their lips could move together more sensually and Wonwoo exhaled contently through his nose as his chest started to feel aflame and the room began to turn hot around them.

When Mingyu sighed softly into their kiss, Wonwoo swallowed the noise, carefully sweeping his tongue over Mingyu’s bottom lip in an unvoiced request and Wonwoo’s hand came to support Mingyu’s neck when the other pressed up against him, their tongues brushing against each other heatedly when their kiss deepened.

When they parted between lip-locks to catch their breath, Mingyu surprised Wonwoo when he spoke, his hand coming up to gently brush against Wonwoo’s cheek as he looked at him.

“… That’s a given.” He said, and Wonwoo wondered if he was replying to what he’d said before as he stared back down into Mingyu’s eyes. “Sometimes…” Mingyu continued, his gaze following his fingers as they left a trail of fire down Wonwoo’s jaw, following the curve of his face all the way to his lips where they stopped.

Mingyu paused and Wonwoo held his breath, wondering if Mingyu could hear his heartbeat as loudly as he could.

Mingyu’s eyes shifted back up to his, and there was a shade in them that made Wonwoo sad.

“…I think it would’ve been better if I’d never met you.” Mingyu finished and placed a soft kiss in the corner of Wonwoo’s mouth before he placed small kisses along his jaw.

Wonwoo wondered why his eyes stung with tears even as Mingyu’s arms came up to wrap him in an embrace and he pulled him closer to kiss him again.

“Why would you say something so cruel…?” He whispered when their lips parted, and Wonwoo didn’t know if Mingyu truthfully hadn’t heard him, or if he just chose to ignore him.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N:
> 
> Ah, Mingyu, why ㅠㅠㅠ
> 
> I'm sorry (No. I'm not. HAHA.)
> 
> Hello Jisoo~ Wonshua anyone? Nah, I agree. Wonwoo should just stick to Mingyu, gdi boy, y u gotta be so difficult. He made a short appearance, but it was fun right?
> 
> In this world, the 95 liners are all older than the other members. Seungcheol is a small-time dealer (as most of you've probably already understood) and Joshua's place is a brothel. HAHA surprised?? Mingyu was right to feel freaked out lmao. He's a sweet devil. Talking of devils, Jeonghan hasn't made an apperance yet. Not sure if he ever will, but he's the spoiled son of an rich infamous drug-lord as well as the heir to his father's shady, criminal empire, for those of you who are curious~
> 
> They're all conected to each other, but I wouldn't say that they are friends, at all ㅋㅋㅋ~ Which is why Seungcheol didn't want Wonwoo to contact Jisoo.
> 
> Sigh. We've caught up with my current whereabouts in the document now, meaning I haven't written much more than this (well, 17 pages, but not enough) and I'm afraid I'm caught on a rough patch... Let's just hope I don't delve into any serious writers block ;;; 
> 
> You guys are really helping! I've said it before, but reading your comments and seeing more subscribers drop in makes me smile and I get more motivated to write. Thanks for that~ Keep up the good work, and so will I!
> 
> I'll see you next time~


	8. Goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's been a long time coming, but to Mingyu it feels sudden still.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BEFORE YOU READ.  
> There's a lot of texting in this chapter. Take note of the time passed between messages sent and received, as sometimes this serves to strenghten the characters emotions and their interactions with each other in the story. Thank you. 
> 
> On another note, I'm sorry this took so long.  
> Thank you so much for all the lovely comments that encouraged and drove me to finally finish this chapter, I love you guys <3

✧ ✧ ✧

 

“Okay, seriously Wonwoo. You can’t keep coming here.”

Wonwoo blinked up at his friend from his position seated underneath one of the many windows on the wall opposite of all the mirrors in the cool, indoor dance studio where Soonyoung assisted a noona from the studio with the childrens summer classes, attempting an innocent smile in return of his friend’s frown.

“Why?” He feigned obliviousness as to why his presence in Soonyoung’s classes was a disturbance and Soonyoung sqauted in front of him, sticking out his hand.

“Because it costs money to attend.” He wiggled his fingers and Wonwoo snorted and gave Soonyoung a high-five instead of any currency.

“I’m not going to pay you.”

“But you’re getting free basic knowledge of the most efficient methods to master your coordination! It’s not right, I tell you! Equivellent exchange and all that.” Soonyoung gestured with his hands in front of himself and Wonwoo gave him a passive look.

“This isn’t Full Metal Alchemist, Soonyoung- _nim_.” He mocked the other with the honorable title the kids called him with. “And besides, I think I had the knowledge of lifting my right arm while taking a step forwards with my left leg at the same time _before_ I even came here — wait, would that mean that I’m fit to teach these kids as well?”

“No. No ‘Wonwoo-nim’ for you, but _fine._ You can stay.” Soonyoung sighed, hurrying to change the subject before Wonwoo got any actual ideas of being anyone’s teacher. “Let’s go meet Jihonnie at the station later when he returns, cool?”

“Yes, Soonyoung-nim~” Wonwoo called sweetly, happy to get his way as Soonyoung rose to call the children back from their water break.

“You know what? I kind of like it when you call me that. Go ahead and keep doing it.” He encouraged with a twinkle in his eye and Wonwoo stuck his tongue out at him in good humour.

“Spoilsport.”

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

“Did Mingyu get bored of playing with you?”

“Gee, thanks.” Wonwoo muttered in return of greeting while Jihoon pushed through the bars of the station and came up to him and Soonyoung whom had eagerly called his name and waved energetically once they’d spotted him in the crowd. “That’s the first thing you say after seeing me?”

“I honestly don’t see why else you’d be here.” Jihoon shrugged and dodged a hug from Soonyoung, throwing him one of his bags to carry instead, and the three of them made their way out into the hot summer-evening together.

“Well, he _has_ been trespassing in my classes all week.” Soonyoung supplied unhelpfully, not sharp enough to have made the connection between Wonwoo’s presence and Mingyu and Wonwoo’s relationship by himself, only now realising that the two were surely related with a small _‘Oh~_ ’. Jihoon turned to Wonwoo.

“Did you fight again?” He asked and Wonwoo sighed heavily.

“I wouldn’t call it a fight…” He answered vaguely and Jihoon clicked his tongue.

“As soon as Junhui is out of the country…” He muttered, but the other two heard him clearly. Soonyoung peeked at Wonwoo over Jihoon’s head.

“The two of you are almost always together. What is it that you guys do anyway?”

“What we do? Well, recently…” Wonwoo trailed off, remembering when he gave Mingyu head in a changingroom at the mall and with flushed cheeks he decided that it would be best to leave his sentence unfinished.

“Well, weather has been fine, so he can’t have gotten sick...” Soonyoung pondered the reason for Wonwoo and Mingyu’s distance.

“Must be a woman.” Jihoon concluded, shooting Soonyoung a glance. “Why are you talking about the weather, idiot.” Soonyoung simply grinned at him.

“Ah, but wouldn’t it be bad if Mingyu-ya went out with a girl? I mean, dating can be quite dangerous…” Soonyoung wore a remorseful expression, looking down at his feet almost wistfully and Jihoon scoffed at his abrupt change of mood.

“What, just because you became a pathetic, snivelling baby when Yuna finally dumped your ass.”

“Don’t say it like that~!” Soonyoung whined, punching Jihoon weakly in the shoulder. Meanwhile Wonwoo’s mind had stopped working.

“You mean Mingyu has found someone he likes?” He interupted Soonyoung and Jihoon’s little squabble and the two looked to him. A smile quickly found its way back onto Soonyoung’s face.

“Oh, that’s right. _Someone he likes_.” He snickered.

“What a childish way to say it.” Jihoon agreed, tutting to himself.

“It’s one of those lovey dovey romance things.” Soonyoung hummed, and then he looked to both Jihoon and Wonwoo pitifully. “Though, neither of you understand those kinds of things…”

Jihoon looked like he wanted to say something to that, but Wonwoo was faster to flick Soonyoung across the forehead, the other yelping in pain and almost dropping Jihoon’s bag when he covered the quickly reddening spot with his hands. Wonwoo huffed, feeling satisfied with the damage he’d caused and crossed his arms over his chest.

“Did Mingyu tell you that he found someone he likes?” He asked and Soonyoung and Jihoon looked at him strangely. “How could someone with such a grim face look like he’s in love? He’d just find the idea of being with someone exhausting, that’s the type of person he is. Emotions always show on one’s face. You can tell from just looking at someone if they’re in love. It said so in a book I read, at least. Either way, Mingyu isn’t in love — with the faces he pulls, it’s impossible.” He finished clippedly.

Jihoon exhaled slowly and tilted his head slightly as he regarded Wonwoo.

“Quoting a book so frevently… You surprised me.” Wonwoo shot him a glare before Soonyoung served his revenge by flicking Wonwoo’s forehead back when he was distracted, quickly reatreating his arm back to his side of Jihoon to avoid the snap of Wonwoo’s teeth.

“Don’t decide what lovestruck people look like. When it comes to this topic, you don’t have anything to say — You’ve never even had a girlfriend.” Soonyoung pointed out, reminding Wonwoo that even Jihoon had had one at one point during their second year (although it hadn’t lasted long) and Wonwoo felt irked recalling it.

“Shut up, idiot.” He replied smartly.

“Putting women aside,” Jihoon hindered his two friends from getting into a serious dispute, holding his hands up slightly even though he knew neither of them were the type to get voilent. “It’s worrisome to have Wonwoo moping around while Mingyu is elsewhere doing whatever.”

“Or whoever.” Soonyoung added unnecessarily at the same time as Wonwoo said, “I am not moping.”

Jihoon held up a finger in warning in Soonyoung’s direction before he turned to address Wonwoo.

“You are.” He told him in-a-matter-of-factly, and Wonwoo sighed heavily. Without a warning he stopped and spun around on his heel.

“You guys suck.” He announced snarkily and set off in a different direction.

“Where are you going?” Soonyoung called after him and Wonwoo waved to the perplexed pair over his shoulder.

“I realised that I’m not as upset with Mingyu as I thought. Actually, you guys reminded me that hanging out with you is _way_ worse!” He called back to them and he heard Soonyoung gasp indignantly.

“You don’t mean that!” He shouted, but Jihoon stepped on his foot to make him shut up and stop drawing people’s attention towards them.

Wonwoo’s phone rang with a message just as he was about to fish it out of his pocket to text Mingyu and he checked the notification on the Kakao Talk app.

 

**Uri Jihoonie~**

 

<( Be nice. )  
RECEIVED 19.38

 

Without bothering to reply Wonwoo fired away his message to Mingyu.

 

**Mingyu~!!** **♡**

 

( I’m coming to see you. )>  
SENT 19.39

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

“Oh.” Wonwoo couldn’t hide the surprise from his face when Mingyu opened the door after just the second knock. He’d almost gotten used to using his own key to enter the apartment by now. “You came to the door.” He noted stupidly, raking his eyes over his friend’s person.

Mingyu’s face was marred by a soft frown, and his lips were strained in a sombre line as he regarded Wonwoo in return. His hair was wet — from a shower, Wonwoo persumed — and Wonwoo thought the image of Mingyu standing in front of him like that was really appealing.

“Return the key to Ms. Su already.” The taller boy muttered before the gleam in his eyes dulled and he looked at Wonwoo in a way that made Wonwoo’s heart beat funny in his chest and his fingers itch to reach out for Mingyu and kiss him. He couldn’t do that there though, in his doorway, but Wonwoo really, really wanted to.

_What was wrong with him?_

Mingyu observed him quietly.

 “… Why did you come?” He sounded accusing in his inquiery and Wonwoo snapped out of his daydreaming to blink at the other, suddenly feeling insecure about his presence outside Mingyu’s door.

“I was nearby.” Wonwoo wondered why he bothered lying when Mingyu could see straight through it, narrowing his gaze, but Mingyu didn’t question him and Wonwoo was grateful for his silence. Feeling a little bashful, Wonwoo tilted his head downwards and peeked up at Mingyu through his lashes. “… Can I come in?” He asked, biting his lip carefully.

Mingyu’s hand played with the handle for a long time, and when Wonwoo was allowed into the apartment he pretended not to hear the defeated sigh that escaped Mingyu’s lips before he closed the door behind them.

Mingyu softly padded over to his bed while Wonwoo delibarately took his time to untie his shoes and only after placing them neatly beside Mingyu’s own sneakers did he straighten up and look over at the other who’d sprawled out on the bed and was scrolling through his phone.

Outside, the sun had finally begun to set, which was a blessing since summer was way too warm and the evenings (though they too were moist and hot) served to soothe everyone after the warm day, even if only a little.

Mingyu’s apartment was warm, but not unpleasantly so, and the small AC above his single window was humming softly, doing it’s best to keep the small room from becoming that of a sauna over the now seemingly endless days. Wonwoo was a little sweaty after having just lounged around in Soonyoung’s studio all day, walked to the station in the sun to greet Jihoon, and then walked all the way to Mingyu’s apartment (Taking the bus seemed like a shame when the weather was nice, after all) and after looking at Mingyu who looked so clean and fresh and soft, he felt sticky and uncomfortable.

“Mind if I use your shower?”

Mingyu looked at him with one eyebrow arched on his forehead, without doubt questioning if Wonwoo had come to his apartment just to ask to borrow his shower in his head but he didn’t voice this wonder out loud. Instead, he just replied with a small _‘sure._ ’ and Wonwoo happilly headed into Mingyu’s small bathroom and stripped of his clothes to wash away the day from his skin.

He stood under the stream of cool water and tilted his head down as to let it wash through his hair and run down his neck and back, savouring the temporary chill it gave to his skin with a content sigh.

When he was done he turned the tap and borrowed Mingyu’s towel to dry his body off. He did quick work with his hair, letting it be a little wet still to copy Mingyu and let it dry by itself over time.

Looking at his heap of clothes Wonwo was reluctant to redress in his striped shirt. He stuck his head out of the bathroom door and looked to Mingyu still lazing in the bed.

“Can I borrow some of your clothes?”

Mingyu didn’t even didn’t even tear his eyes from his phone to glance at him, but simply hummed lowly. Wonwoo took the noise as allowance and walked over to Mingyu’s wardrobe, picking out a random T-shirt and a pair of sweat-shorts that were a little loose around his hips but stayed up once he had tied the waistband. Once he was dressed, Wonwoo went over to the bed and sloppily climbed onto it to join Mingyu.

“Come on.” Mingyu grunted grumpily in protest when Wonwoo’s knee jabbed into his hipbone on the way over him.

“Sorry.” Wonwoo giggled airily and made sure to bounce a little more than necessary before he settled down properly on his back, leaning his head against Mingyu’s shoulder as he lay beside him and peeked at whatever the other was doing on his phone.

“ _Hao?_ ” He read the name of the person Mingyu was chatting to, but before he could read what they were writing, Mingyu finished up his message and locked the screen. “Is it a friend?” He asked curiously when Mingyu turned his head to look at him.

“Not really.” Was his listless reply, his nose folding lightly, and Wonwoo wondered what he was supposed to make of that sort of answer. He thought about the incident with Joshua that had caused their distance from one another lately and cringed slightly on the inside.

He turned onto his side and traced the shapes of Mingyu’s face with his eyes, a warm sensation of happiness spreading in his chest now that they could be close to one another again. He didn’t want to admit that he had missed Mingyu, because the other didn’t seem to be as excited to be reunited as he was. 

While Wonwoo could feel a heat under his skin, Mingyu was as cool as ever. (He envied him a little for that.)

“I’m glad you’re making an effort to get to know people.” He offered, tracing his finger up the bridge of Mingyu’s nose before dragging it along Mingyu’s eyebrow, smoothening the tiny hairs into a nice line.

Mingyu hummed and watched Wonwoo’s face while the other drew patterns over his cheek. The small journey of Wonwoo’s hand came to an end with his thumb resting at the corner of Mingyu’s lips and he slowly raised his gaze to meet Mingyu’s eye and the other stared back at him. Wonwoo could feel Mingyu’s breath tickle his wrist and he swallowed. It was a perfect opportunity to share a kiss, but for some reason Wonwoo hesitated, and then Mingyu’s phone vibrated with an incoming message and Wonwoo was startled, pulling his hand back from Mingyu with a sharp jerk.

“Want to watch a movie?” He heard himself ask with a strained voice, his cheeks flooding with colour while his heart beat rapidly in his chest as he looked to Mingyu. Why was he feeling so antsy and awkward? It was just _Mingyu,_ for Christ’s sake.

Mingyu blinked at his retreat, but didn’t comment, simply adjusting his position and pulling back from Wonwoo so that they weren’t lying so close to each other anymore. Wonwoo hated that his chest stung when Mingyu put distance between them.

“Sure, you pick one.” Mingyu sat up to reach for his laptop that lay on the floor beside his bed, picking it up and turning back to hand it to Wonwoo who felt silly that his fingers were trembling as he accepted it from the other's hands.

“If I choose a drama, will you watch it with me?”

“Definitely not.” Mingyu huffed, unlocking his phone to read whatever message had made Wonwoo miss his chance, and Wonwoo secretly watched Mingyu’s face while the other read and typed a reply to the one Wonwoo persumed to be ‘ _Hao_ ’.

“Fine.” Wonwoo really wanted to watch a drama though and ended up playing one anyway. He felt quite sullen, but tried to not let it show as he settled down on the bed besides Mingyu.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

_Fifteen._

Wonwoo counted the number of messages Mingyu received and replied to throughout the course of the two episodes he’d managed to watch of the drama. He was watching by himself and Mingyu was paying neither him nor the screen of the laptop any mind, fiddling with his phone, alternating between watching youtube videos, browsing memes and the Kakao Talk application from what Wonwoo had been able to sneak a peek off of.

Wonwoo wasn’t bothered by it, but it was distracting whenever Mingyu’s phone would vibrate with a small ‘ _pling_ ’ in the middle of the dramatic music playing over moving pictures he was trying to focus on, and he shot Mingyu a glance when it happened for the fifteenth time.

Mingyu’s hair had mostly dried by now and the strands looked fluffy and soft lying over his scalp. Wonwoo admired him secretly, his eyes sliding over Mingyu’s half-lidded eyes and the purse of his lips while he typed back to ‘ _Hao_ ’.

It wasn’t that he wanted to take a peek at whatever Mingyu and this person were writing to each other, but Wonwoo felt a little perturbed, leaning closer to Mingyu and bumping their shoulders together as he peeked down at the other’s face.

“How come you never reply to me that fast?” He wondered curiously, part of him preparing to feel annoyed by Mingyu’s answer because he knew the other would simply brush him off like he always did.

“I do reply.” Mingyu glanced at him with a careful expression and Wonwoo pressed his lips together, not exactly feeling happy that he’d been right.

“You didn’t reply to my text from earlier.” He pointed out. He was missing the dramatic scene between the two drama lead actors, but it wasn’t like he’d been super invested to begin with, so he didn’t care.

“I did.” Mingyu’s voice came out a little clipped — defensive? — and he resumed the youtube video he’d been watching before he’d been disturbed. “I wrote ‘don’t come’.”

There was an ache present in Wonwoo’s chest that he didn’t know what to do with as he watched Mingyu’s profile. He didn’t like it.

He didn’t want things to be like this between him and Mingyu. He wanted to fix it, but it was hard, because he didn’t even know what was wrong. Had he done something? Was Mingyu having one of his bad mood periods? Was he supposed to give him space? But, they’d been apart for almost a week and a half now, and the selfish side of Wonwoo wanted to remain in Mingyu’s vicinity, be close to him, and be able to watch him, hear his voice and touch him. Even if Mingyu would straight up tell him to go, Wonwoo didn’t think he would’ve been able to.

Putting the laptop aside Wonwoo placed his arm above Mingyu’s head and leant over the other’s face, watching Mingyu’s eyelids flutter slightly when his breath washed over the other’s cheek.

“… Do you want me to leave?” His voice was a whisper, dark and smooth and his eyes flickered to Mingyu’s tongue when it briefly darted out to wet his lips before the other slowly raised his gaze and met Wonwoo’s eye.

“Does it matter what I want?” Mingyu’s words struck a sensitive chord within Wonwoo and he instantly felt bad. He was overcome with the urge to stressfully tell Mingyu that ‘of course it mattered! Your opinion matters to me,’ but for some reason his lips remained sealed and not a word of the things he wanted to say got out. “You’re going to stay anyway.” Mingyu mumbled, shrugging softly under Wonwoo, and he wasn’t wrong.

Wonwoo watched Mingyu’s eyes trace the shape of his jaw before they settled on his lips and an entirely different emotion plucked at the strings of Wonwoo’s heart as he stared back at the male underneath him.

“Can I kiss you?” Wonwoo blurted and he wondered why Mingyu gave him such a strange look — was it because he sounded so breathless? — but the other’s eyes quickly darkened in that way Wonwoo had grown familiar to and secretly had started to really like.

“This is the first time you’ve asked...” Mingyu’s hand came up to slowly caress Wonwoo’s cheek and it was agonizingly warm and the gesture so affectionate Wonwoo had to set his jaw to not show how much Mingyu’s touch wounded him.

When their lips met, Wonwoo couldn’t help but think it tasted somewhat bittersweet.

Mingyu searched his face with careful eyes after he’d pulled back, trying to gauge Wonwoo’s emotions through the infinate darkness of his gaze.

“Why?” He baited for Wonwoo to open up to him, to tell him where his sudden insecurity came from, but instead of answering Wonwoo soflty shook his head and pressed their lips together again, savouring the warmth spreading from Mingyu’s lips onto his and slowly overtaking his body and soul.

It wasn’t that he didn't know why he’d asked for permission although the things they did had always been based upon mutual agreement between the two from the start and sharing a kiss wasn’t new to them anymore, but Wonwoo couldn’t say it.

How could he tell Mingyu that he’d asked because he was afraid of being pushed away? 

Things that had felt natural and obvious about their relationship was crumbling into ashes in front of Wonwoo’s eyes. He didn’t know what was right and what was wrong with Mingyu nowadays.

He could feel Mingyu pulling away and he didn’t know how to keep him close anymore.

When Mingyu’s phone sounded with another notification (sixteen) the male really did pull back from Wonwoo, and his lips felt strangely cold when Mingyu’s wasn’t there to overlap them anymore. He stared hollowly at Mingyu’s profile while the other unlocked his phonescreen and when Mingyu opened up his Kakao Talk application, Wonwoo could acknowledge the sting inside his chest as dejection.

Sighing silently he pulled back and returned to the laptop.

After another minute or two, Mingyu’s phone sounded again.

_‘Pling’_

_Seventeen._

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

Mingyu’s lips were still warm when the two of them came together under his thin sheets after nightfall. His body, his hands, his touch, his eyes, his everything set of a fire within Wonwoo that he only knew of one way to sate and when he held Mingyu’s face between his hands and pulled him closer to kiss him greedily, Mingyu kissed him back with just as much passion that Wonwoo had come to assosciate him with.

In that moment of tangled limbs and mixed breaths Wonwoo inhaled the scent of Mingyu’s shampoo and thought that everything was going to be okay, no matter the shortcomings that sometimes appeared in the cracks of their relationship.

Being with Mingyu still felt good. His lips felt good, his touch felt good, Mingyu’s hand on Wonwoo’s dick felt good, his body felt good — everything that was Mingyu when they came together was good. Wonwoo just wished that when the flames of their passion had been quelled the warm atmosphere between them would remain good, but it didn’t. Mingyu pulled away from him, the night cooled, and a slowly souring feeling was all that Wonwoo was left with.

Looking at Mingyu’s back in the dark later, Wonwoo contemplated reaching out and placing his palm in-between Mingyu’s shoulderblades just to feel the heat of the other’s skin underneath his fingers, but he never did. Something held him back.

Wonwoo felt as if he couldn’t reach Mingyu anymore.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

“Mingyu?”

“Oh.”

After being called, Mingyu had turned around and found the familiar face of his classmate Xu Minghao staring back at him in the middle of the small corner supermarket, and he quickly greeted the other with a small nod of his head.

“Minghao-ssi.”

The Chinese huffed, crossing his arms over his chest while jutting one side of his hip out and unfortunately seeming as if he had no intention of leaving Mingyu to do his evening shopping on his own despite Mingyu’s silent prayers.

“Drop the _–ssi_ already. We’ve been in the same class for an entire school year.”

Mingyu pressed his lips together. He didn’t like letting people into his life (because he considered he had enough heartache because of a certain dark haired boy already to last him a lifetime) but he wouldn’t argue with someone he at the very least considered an aquaintence and tell them to go away or leave him alone even though he’d very much would’ve liked to be as rude to do so. Instead, he shrugged listlessly and went back to browsing the magazines he’d been looking through before Minghao had appeared.

Used to Mingyu’s silence, the other male turned towards the shelves as well and started browsing the different papers alongside him.

“… How are you?” Of course Mingyu wasn’t fortunate enough to be spared the small talk either and he bit back a sigh, putting back the comic book he’d been fliping through to its correct spot on the shelf.

“Fine. I’m just fine.” He said a bit clippedly, but he wasn’t going to talk to his classmate about his problems. Mingyu didn’t even really want to think about his problems — or, _problem_ — nor the sole person standing behind them, and he didn’t want to be a nuisance either.

Minghao was a very interesting character. He was very observant, and smart, and he had sharp eyes attentive of details, which was probably one of the reasons Mingyu really didn’t wish to get involved with him, and he reaffirmed this when the other eyed him carefully in the store, probably reading more from Mingyu’s tone and expression than Mingyu wanted him to.

“Alright. That’s good.” Minghao said, placing back the magazine he had thought looked interesting but found disapointing and exchanging it for another one — one on nature science? Curious choice, but Mingyu wasn’t going to ask. He was busy releasing the breath he’d been holding, relieved that Minghao hadn’t made a remark on his obvious lie. The Chinese’s tar black eyes scanned over an article and his expression was impassive as he spoke again. “How are things with Wonwoo-ssi?”

Mingyu’s fingers stilled and for a moment, so did the world around him. Suddenly he could hear his heartbeat clearly inside his head and a chill settled in his chest. His feet felt heavy like lead against the floor of the small store, and his tongue stuck to the roof of his mouth making it difficult for him to swallow. Slowly he turned to look at Minghao who didn’t meet his gaze, still feigning interest in his magazine.

Mingyu had to lick his lips, suddenly feeling unpleasant and too hot even as airconditioning kept the air inside the shop cool.

“… I’m sorry?” He managed after the fifth try to get his voice out.

Picking up on the edge of his vibes, Minghao slowly lowered his magazine and turned to meet Mingyu’s intense gaze. The other looked at him for some time — which felt like an eternity to Mingyu, to be honest — before he blinked slowly once.

“Wonwoo-ssi.” The Chinese repeated smoothly, looking at Mingyu as if he was supposed to know what he was getting at without telling him. “You’re in love with him, aren’t you?”

Every sound on the planet ceased and when Mingyu tried to inhale, a painful trail of ice followed the breath down his throat and into his lungs.

_Love._

Mingyu had no idea how Minghao had found out. He’d probably figured it out on his own, because he was smart like that, but upon hearing someone else saying the words Mingyu hadn’t even dared admit to himself yet out loud made him feel like he was going to throw up.

Minghao saw his expression visibly pale and hurried to stop the train of panic ramming into Mingyu’s heart.

“I’m not going to tell anyone.” He said so seriously Mingyu was inclined to believe him. He tried to find any trace of reppellance within the other’s eyes, but didn’t, and the lack of disgust and derisive comments from the other boy confused Mingyu, because he’d been sure that that was the sort of response anyone would give someone harbouring feelings for another boy. “And I didn’t call you out to shun you, so stop looking at me like I’m going to bite your head off.” Minghao added upon receiving his narrowed glare.

“I — I wasn’t.” Mingyu protested meekly. He’d broken into cold sweat, but Minghao had yet to sneer at him or threaten to tell their classmate about Mingyu’s affections, and Mingyu was conflicted by the seemingly calm atmosphere that remained between them even though he felt as if his entire world had just been ripped away from under his feet.

Mingyu thought they had been careful. _He_ had been careful. Not even Wonwoo knew, yet here stood Xu Minghao, one of his classmates he wasn’t even that well aquainted with, and had him all figured out. Was it obvious? Did anyone else see it as well? Did Wonwoo’s friends see it? The queasiness within Mingyu only worsened the more his thoughts span around inside his head.

“Okay. Whatever.” Minghao’s lips pulled into a thin line, but his eyes didn’t turn mean. “We’re not exactly friends.” He said, and the words struck a cold pole of fear through Mingyu’s heart, and for a brief second he was terrified that Minghao would whisper his secret to the world. “But…” The Chinese continued, and his voice turned lithe and soft, like a gentle gust of wind. “It’s just that… Sometimes, you have this grim expression on your face. And it’s quite unsettling.”

Mingyu felt like he was starting to get a headache from their conversation. Was Minghao insulting him now? Why? He didn’t understand where the other wanted to go with this conversation at all and Minghao seemed to notice as much, rolling his eyes and sighing exasperatedly before opening his palm for Mingyu.

“Give me your phone.” He said, looking straight into Mingyu’s eyes and Mingyu hesitated but complied with the other’s demand in the end. As he handed over his phone his mind played an odd scene wherein Minghao made a dash for it with and Mingyu never got to see him nor his phone ever again, but he quickly disregarded the image and before he knew it he felt the cool metal of his phone in his palm as it was returned to him.

“I added myself on Kakao Talk.” Mingyu stopped himself from asking why, biting his tongue in the last second. “I don’t want you to do anything hasty that you’d come to regret.” Minghao’s eyes were clear and his voice earnest, making the heavy feeling of unease within Mingyu’s stomach increase slightly as he got what the other was indicating towards.

Their entire conversation felt like something surreal — as if it didn’t belong to the real world and the two of them had entered another universe of their own where their exchanged words were codes for something entirely else, and a small pounding was quickly growing more prominent within Mingyu’s skull.

“… You just said that we’re not friends.” Mingyu mumbled, his mind wondering why Minghao was forcing some form of connection between them and what the other could possibly gain from approaching him like this.

“Not yet.” Was the other’s smooth reply, and Mingyu couldn’t deny that Minghao’s confidence impressed him. “I think… talking here is a little difficult.” The Chinese gestured vaguely with his hand in the air between them before pointing to Mingyu’s phone still clutched in the taller male’s hand. “But if it’s through that, you won’t have to worry about anyone eavesdropping or someone else finding out.”

“Oh.” Mingyu wasn’t sure if he was even comfortable with the idea of talking to Minghao simply because the other had figured him out, but he supposed it was a nice gesture on the Chinese’s behalf, and a kind offer — to listen, if Mingyu did end needing someone to turn to.

“Write me if you want to.” Minghao shrugged, shoving his hands into the pockets of his shorts. “I’m not saying I’ll prove to be helpful, but having someone to talk to is in general considered nice.”

Mingyu considered the possibility of Minghao perhaps being right.

“Try to enjoy summer break, okay?”

“Yeah. You too.” Mingyu responded weekly before Minghao slipped out of the store, leaving only his words and an after-image of his presence that had shook Mingyu out of his orbit. When the other was gone, Mingyu’s knees almost buckled underneath him and he put his hand against the glass of the store’s window and leant again it, allowing his bangs to fall into his eyes as he stared blindly at his feet.

Someone knew.

Not just anyone, not a random stranger on the street, but _Xu_ _Minghao_ knew. Someone in their school, someone in Mingyu’s class — Minghao knew, and he wasn’t appaled.

Mingyu wasn’t sure what he was feeling, his emotions all over the place, and while a few of them were positive, like the unexpected relief, most of them were colder, like anxiety, worry and stress.

_“You’re in love with him, aren’t you?”_

Love.

Yeah. Kim Mingyu was in love with Jeon Wonwoo.

That was the tragic truth, wasn’t it?

It saddened Mingyu a little that everything he had tried to dispose of and bury had easily been dug up and freed by a single conversation with his classmate that he’d only run into by pure coincidence. It was frustrating, but at the same time, in a bemused way, it was funny.

He repeatedly went over their exchange in his head, thinking about the words Minghao had spoken to him.

When Mingyu had said that they weren’t friends, Minghao had replied with ‘yet’. Including that he gave Mingyu his contact and offered to be someone for Mingyu to talk to about everything — his feelings, his guilt, his frustrations, _Wonwoo_ — it started to dawn on Mingyu that Minghao had practically offered him a friendship.

Mingyu didn’t want friends. Mingyu didn’t want more people in his life that were going to use him or take advantage of him or to control the things he felt or did, but then his mind flashed to Wonwoo, and, to Mingyu’s great dislike, to the man called Joshua that they’d left in that eerie building.

Wonwoo had friends, quite a few of them.

Mingyu only had Wonwoo.

Maybe that unbalance between their two worlds was something that needed adjustment.

Weighing the pros and cons of actually texting Minghao back and forth in his mind on his way home made Mingyu’s thoughts spin and his head feel absolutely dizzy in the late summerevening heat. Despite the situation with someone finding them out turning out better than he’d expected it to, Mingyu still felt shaken and uneasy about the entire ordeal.

When he was almost back at his apartment, the ice cream he’d bought pretty much already having melted in the bag, his phone sounded with a notification. With his heart lodging in his throat, Mingyu fumbled with his pockets before he quickly whipped his phone out and checked the screen.

 

**JWonWoo**

 

<( I’m coming to see you. )  
RECEIVED 19.39

 

What with how stressed he was feeling right now, having the person accountable for all conflicting feelings in Mingyu’s life come over didn’t really appeal to him, and Mingyu realised then that he would have to message Minghao, because he was bursting at the seams and needed some way to vent out his frustrations before he actually broke.

He quickly typed out a reply to Wonwoo before he went to his newly added contact and struggled slightly with his message to the Chinese before he sent it.

 

**JWonWoo**

 

<( I’m coming to see you. )  
RECEIVED 19.39

( Don’t come. )>  
SENT 19.40

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

**Hao**

 

( Can I trust you? )>  
READ 19:52

<( Try. )  
RECEIVED 19:52

<( I haven’t told anyone, and I’ve known for a while. )  
RECEIVED 19:58

( How long have you known? )>  
READ 20:01

<( Had a sneaking suspicion by the start of second semester. )  
RECEIVED 20:02

<( Convinced come spring. )  
RECEIVED 20:02

( How did you figure it out? )>  
READ 20:04

<( You weren’t obvious. I’m just very observant. )  
RECEIVED 20:04

<( Can I ask if you’re together? )  
RECEIVED 20:05

( We’re not. )>  
READ 20:07

<( OK. )  
RECEIVED 20:07

<( How did it start? )  
RECEIVED 20:10

( Unintetionally. )>  
READ 20:11

( He was drunk. We messed around. )>  
READ 20:12

( Never stopped. )>  
READ 20:12

<( Do you want to stop? )  
RECEIVED 20:13

<( Sorry, though question. )  
RECEIVED 20:17

<( I’m trying to figure out why you’re so sad. )  
RECEIVED 20:18

( Why do you insist on me being depressed? )>  
READ 20:21

<( I guess I care or something. )  
RECEIVED 20:22

<( So? )  
RECEIVED 20:25

( So what? )>  
READ 20:25

<( Why do you look like you’re dying inside everytime I see you? )  
RECEIVED 20:26

( He doesn’t feel the same. )>  
READ 20:28

<( How do you know? )  
RECEIVED 20:28

( I know. )>  
READ 20:30

<( I won’t press for details… But I am confused. )  
RECEIVED 20:31

<( Did he reject you? )  
RECEIVED 20:31

<( I’m sorry if I’m overstepping my boundaries with all the questions. )  
RECEIVED 20:33

( Not exactly. )>  
READ 20:35

<( Tell me? )  
RECEIVED 20:36

( Sometimes I try to put distance between us. )>  
READ 20:37

( Figure maybe if we’re not together, it’ll blow over. )>  
READ 20:37

( But he’s hard to shut out. )>  
READ 20:38

( He doesn’t want to stop. )>  
READ 20:38

<( But he’s not into you? )  
RECEIVED 20:39

( He likes sex. )>  
READ 20:41

( TMI? )>  
READ 20:45

<( TMI. )  
RECEIVED 20:46

( Sorry. )>  
READ 20:47

<( No, it’s OK. )  
RECEIVED 20:47

<( I think I understand the situation now, kind of. )  
RECEIVED 20:47

<( I’m sorry. That must suck. )  
RECEIVED 20:48

<( Have you met up during summer? )  
RECEIVED 20:50

<( Do you still mess around? )  
RECEIVED 20:50

( He’s here right now. )>  
READ 20:53

<( At your place? )  
RECEIVED 20:54

<( Did you invite him? )  
RECEIVED 20:56

( No. )>  
READ 21.01

<( Tell him to leave. )  
RECEIVED 21:02

<( Unless you want him there. )  
RECEIVED 21:03

 ( He invited himself. )>  
READ 21:15

( I can’t say no to him. )>  
READ 21:16

<( That’s kind of pitiful. )  
RECEIVED 21:21

( I know. )>  
READ 21:21

<( You really are in love with him. )  
RECEIVED 21:25

( Yeah. I guess. )>  
READ 21:32

<( Is it hard? )  
RECEIVED 21:34

( At times. )>  
READ 21:35

( It’s painful. )>  
READ 21:37

<( I can’t say I can relate. )  
RECEIVED 21:38

<( But for what it’s worth, I’m sorry. )  
RECEIVED 21:38

<( You’re close friends, right? )  
RECEIVED 21:39

( Yeah. )>  
READ 21:41

<( Sorry. )  
RECEIVED 21:42

<( That must be rough. )  
RECEIVED 21:42

<( I didn’t know Wonwoo-hyung was that type of person. )  
RECEIVED 21:44

( What type? )>  
READ 21:44

<( Selfish. )  
RECEIVED 21:44

( He’s not. )>  
READ 21:44

<( He doesn’t like you, but he has sex with you? )  
RECEIVED 21:45

( He doesn’t mean any harm. )>  
READ 21:45

<( He’s using you. )  
RECEIVED 21:46

<( He’s exploiting your feelings for him for personal gain. )  
RECEIVED 21:46

<( That’s called stringing someone along. )  
RECEIVED 21:47

( He didn’t promise me anything. )>  
READ 21:52

( It was supposed to be casual. )>  
READ 21:52

( I’m the one who messed up and fell in love with him. )>  
READ 21:53

<( Does he know? )  
RECEIVED 21:54

( No. )>  
READ 21:57

 

<( He’s going to find out. )  
RECEIVED 21:58

<( One day. )  
RECEIVED 21:58

( He won’t. )>  
READ 22:00

<( I’ve never considered you a fool, Kim Mingyu. )  
RECEIVED 22:08

<( He will find out. )  
RECEIVED 22:38

<( What you need to do is think carefully about what you’re going to do when that day comes. )  
RECEIVED 22:45

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

**Wae chingu ya?**

_Uri Jihonnie~, KwonSoonYoung-ah,_ ✦☆ ♡ _Junhun_ ♡ ☆✦

 

 **Uri Jihonnie~**  
  
<( Believe us now? )  
RECEIVED 11.32

 **KwonSoonYoung-ah**  
  
<( KIM MINGYU-YA~ ㅎㅎ in love~~~ ㅎㅎㅎ )  
RECEIVED 11.32  
<( Didn’t I say so?? I said so! )  
RECEIVED 11.33  
<( You know nothing Jeon Wonwoo! ㅋㅋㅋ )  
RECEIVED 11.33

 **Uri Jihonnie~**  
  
<( Don’t be an ass, Soonyoung. )  
RECEIVED 11.34

✦☆ ♡ **Junhun** ♡ ☆✦  
  
<( ??? )  
RECEIVED 11.35  
<( What’s going on back home ??? )  
RECEIVED 11.36  
<( Stop making summer memories without me! )  
RECEIVED 11.36

 **Uri Jihonnie~**  
  
<( … That’s not it, Jun. )  
RECEIVED 11.36

 **KwonSoonYoung-ah**  
  
<( I think Wonu’s mad. He’s not replying… )  
RECEIVED 11.37

 **Uri Jihoonie~**  
  
<( He’s reading our messages though. I can see his symbol in the bottom of the chat… )  
RECEIVED 11.37

 **KwonSoonYoung-ah**  
  
<( Don’t worry, Wonwoo-ya~ We’ll find you a girlfriend too so you won’t be lonely~ ♡ )  
RECEIVED 11.37

 **Uri Jihoonie~**  
  
<( Just shut up, Soonyoung. )  
RECEIVED 11.38

 **KwonSoonYoung-ah**  
  
<( **!!** ∑(° [Д](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/%D0%94) ° ;;) What did I do?? )  
RECEIVED 11.38

✦☆ ♡ **Junhun** ♡ ☆✦  
  
<( Like I said )  
RECEIVED 11.39  
<( _**????**_ )  
RECEIVED 11.41  
<( Don’t get into any relationships before I get back plz. )  
RECEIVED 11.43

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

Wonwoo stared up at the groupchat between his friends on his phone screen, huffing irritably as he read their messages. Feeling putout, and not understanding why, he laid the device down onto his chest and stared at the white ceiling above Mingyu’s bed.

Mingyu had gone out to buy groceries (hopefully some sort of breakfast — or maybe an early lunch they could share), leaving Wonwoo alone with his thoughts in his apartment, and Wonwoo’s thoughts went ‘round and ‘round and ‘round.

He was staring at the small bumps and dents of the uneaven ceiling that you normally wouldn’t notice unless you looked really hard, and recounted his conversation with Soonyoung and Jihoon from the day before as well as the messages his friend’s kept sending him after he’d told them of Mingyu’s unusual excessive texting of last night.

Could it be that Mingyu in fact liked someone?

Wonwoo wasn’t sure what the probability of that made him feel. Angry? Intruiged? Mostly he felt disheartened in a sense, because if that really was the case, why hadn’t Mingyu told him anything about it?

To Wonwoo, Mingyu was his closest friend and someone he could share everything with, and considering the possibility that Mingyu liked someone but didn’t want to share those thoughts or feelings with Wonwoo made him feel slightly cheated — like he valued his and Mingyu’s friendship more than Mingyu did. Thinking about it in that aspect made Wonwoo’s chest ache as he lied there and blinked up at Mingyu’s ceiling.

His thoughts kept tumbling around and another thing that troubled him was the biggest question of all — _Who?_ Whom could it be that Mingyu had fallen for, and when could he have met and fallen for this person without Wonwoo’s knowledge of their existance? Wonwoo thought really hard about it, almost until his brain hurt, but not a single person came to his mind.

Mingyu wasn’t a very social person — the idea that he would’ve run into someone recently and managed to fall in love with them already seemed silly to Wonwoo, so he quickly outruled that possibility. Mingyu wasn’t very keen on people in general, the only reason the two of them ever became friends being that Wonwoo was insistent on sticking to the slightly taller and withdrawn male no matter how much Mingyu tried to refuse his presence. Mingyu had been aquainted with Wonwoo’s friends for years now, yet he never showed any interest in getting to know them on a personal level aside through Wonwoo’s friendship with them. Wonwoo knew Mingyu the best out of anyone, and he knew Mingyu couldn’t suddenly open his heart to any person just like that. That’s not how Mingyu worked.

So how come Wonwoo’s friends were assured Mingyu was in love?

Wonwoo had strongly opposed the suggestion when Soonyoung and Jihoon had brought it up — because he knew _Mingyu_ — but now he started to lose confidence in his original sense of assurement. Could he have been wrong?

Wonwoo didn’t think the person Mingyu was texting — this ‘ _Hao_ ’ — was the one of Mingyu’s possible interest, because Mingyu hadn’t even admitted them as a friend when Wonwoo had asked about them, and in Mingyu terms, that meant he wasn’t very close to this person. Mingyu had continued to text with ‘ _Hao_ ’ for the entirety of the evening though, so what did that make the other? Maybe ‘ _Hao_ ’ knew whom it was that Mingyu held dear?

The idea made something unpleasantly sad twist in Wonwoo’s gut and worked to swallow around the lump that had formed in his throat. Again he wondered if Mingyu really didn’t consider him a friend after all. Why wouldn’t he tell Wonwoo about this person that he liked otherwise? Why was this ‘ _Hao_ ’, not even a friend, more entitled to know than Wonwoo?

Realising his current train of thought was starting to genuinely upset him, Wonwoo squeezed his eyes shut and massaged the bridge of his nose and tried to ignore the many confusing and dizzying thoughts plaguing his mind.

The image of Mingyu appeared in Wonwoo’s head — more specifically his face, set in a soft frown with a gentle crease between his brows, Mingyu’s lips in a grim line turned slightly downwards in the corners and Mingyu’s eyes, looking at Wonwoo and brimming with unspoken words and a sadness so heavy Wonwoo’s heart couldn’t take it and he quickly snapped his eyes open again, blinking until the ceiling above him came back into focus.

His heart was beating against his ribcage and his chest rose and fell steadily with his deep breaths. Wonwoo’s palms had grown sweaty and he shakily wiped them off against Mingyu’s sheets with a wavering inhale while the image of Mingyu remained strong within his mind’s eye.

How could someone who looked so pained all the time be in love?

Why was it that no matter how hard he tried to, Wonwoo couldn’t recall Mingyu looking at him without his eyes carrying an underlying melancholy within them?

The next time Wonwoo blinked, he felt the cold trail left behind by the single tear that escaped his eye and journeyed down the side of his face against his cheek and immidiatedly blinked again, allowing for another one to follow.

_Why… was he crying?_

“Huh? Why am I —” Wonwoo’s hand went up to touch his cheek and froze there, his fingertips getting wet by the tears now staining the pillow underneath his head.

Another throb of his heart, and Wonwoo realised why he suddenly hurt so much.

Could it be that it was because of Wonwoo that Mingyu was so sad all the time?

_Was it because of him?_

Mingyu’s tired and worn and sombre expressions all flashed in front of Wonwoo’s eyes, every memory of Mingyu’s careful touches when he would hold Wonwoo and the sad smiles he would give him every now and then, and Wonwoo’s chest tightened until he felt as if he couldn’t breathe.

Quickly he tore the duvet of the bed over his head and once enveloped by the warm darkness, he curled in on himself and dug his nails into his arms. The tears ran freely down his face now and Wonwoo clutched a hand over his mouth as to not voice the choked sobs he could feel tearing their way up his throat, his heart beating so strongly and painfully inside his chest that it felt like his flesh was burning.

_It couldn’t be true._

He had to be wrong, he had to —

But within him, Wonwoo knew that the reason he was so shook was because he knew he was right.

The reason behind Mingyu’s sorrowful expressions, the person Mingyu liked —

Wonwoo had realised.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

Mingyu knew something was off as soon as he unlocked the door to his apartment and there was stilness. For a second he wondered if Wonwoo simply hadn’t woken up yet but then a small, worrying sound broke through the eerie silence and Mingyu’s heart sank within his chest and a bad feeling took ahold of him

“Wonwoo?” He called uncertainly, snapping out of his paralysation and hurrying to enter the apartment and close the door behind him. Another sob sounded and the panic inside of Mingyu’s chest elevated. He disregarded removing his shoes, entering his room as quickly as he could and immidiatedly locating the lump underneath his sheets on the bed.

Dropping the bag of freshly bought bread and cereal on the floor, Mingyu sped to the bed and skid onto his knees on the floor beside it, his hands imiidiatedly flying out to touch the tremlbing form of his friend through the duvet.

“Wonwoo.” Mingyu’s frightened voice stocked inside his throat when he tried calling out to the other boy. “Why are you crying? Did something happen? Wonwoo—” Just as he was about to detangle Wonwoo from the cocoon he was hiding under to pull him into a hug, hold him, comfort him in whichever way he could, Wonwoo’s voice sounded from under the sheets.

“Mingyu, I’m sorry…”

Mingyu’s heart sank further, a foreboding feeling causing the hairs on his arms to rise. He tried to calm his racing pulse and wet his lips with his tongue.

“What are you talking about? Why are you apologising?” Mingyu tried to keep his voice soft and gentle — low, as to not stress Wonwoo out by letting him know how frightened the entire situation made him. Frightened because he had a feeling why Wonwoo was crying, but he still had to ask.

Slowly, Wonwoo pulled down the top of the duvet, exposing his wet cheeks and red, swollen eyes, and the anguished glimmer in his eyes made Mingyu want to grab ahold of his face and kiss him over and over until he had erased all the pain within Wonwoo’s heart, but he didn’t, couldn’t, because he was frozen to the floor by the fear tearing at his chest.

“I’m sorry…” Wonwoo repeated with a broken voice and a strange noise of something like a crack sounded inside Mingyu’s head.

“Why are you sorry?” Mingyu reached out and placed his hand against Wonwoo’s soft cheek, wiping fruitlessly at the tears pooling in the corner of Wonwoo’s eye. If anything, it looked as if his touch wounded Wonwoo more than it soothed him and his face scrunched up as he bit back another sob.

Mingyu tried to understand what had gone wrong as Wonwoo took a shaky inhale and looked at him with agonized eyes.

“Mingyu, am I the one you love…?”

 

✧ ✧ ✧

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry to end it on a cliff-hanger like this when you've already waited so long for this chapter... Thank you guys so much for your patience. Your continued support and especially all the sweet comments made me really inspired to finish this chapter, so thank you, really.
> 
> For those of you who still don't know, I've just happened to move to a new country, following shortly just after the new years, which is why I haven't really had the time to wrap this chapter up. The part up until Mingyu and Minghao's text messages was finished around christmas, but then I didn't really know how to advance... Also, I still don't like the meeting between Mingyu and Minghao in the convinience store. It's badly written, and I apologise for it, but on the other hand I couldn't rewrite it or change it, so I guess it is what it is.
> 
> Minghao.  
> Someone wanted me to write Wonwoo being jealous, but somehow I couldn't get myself to do it, and it turned into this instead... Haha, I'm sorry~ I actually considered bringing Minghao into the story solely for that reason (another love interest/rival), but then when it was time for me to write him, I wanted to write him as a smarter character that could tell it to Mingyu like it was. A third and very intelligent perspective, if you'd like. Mingyu needed someone to talk to, thank heavens for Minghao. I wanted Mingyu to make a friend who was honest and straightforwad.
> 
> So, Mingyu gained a friend, but lost another...? Is this the end of Meanie in this fic? Lmao, we'll have to see... See you guys next time~
> 
> I'm studying a new language now, in a new school (I haven't been a student for the past two years!!? It's hard to get back into!) but I'll definitely make sure to take my time and write for this story inbetween homework and making new friends.
> 
> Again, thank you all so much for waiting, and again, a lot happened in one chapter, ㅋㅋㅋ... I hope the wait was worth it.
> 
> Lots of love~


	9. Time, and time, and time again, I open my door for you.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is their painful dance finally over? Mingyu hates that he doesn't want it to be.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

Mingyu’s breath stocked, his mind went blank, and reality ceased to exist for a moment. A resounding crack rang inside his ears once more, and Mingyu’s heart completely shattered as his world started to crumble around him.

As if physically burnt, he pulled his hand away from Wonwoo’s cheek.

He had no words, no sentences, no reply to give, his mind going frighteningly blank, and all Mingyu could do was to mutely stare back at Wonwoo with his mouth hanging slightly open and his senses slowly numbing.

“Are you in love with me?”

Apparently Mingyu not giving Wonwoo a reply was enough of an answer and Mingyu watched with a bleeding heart how Wonwoo’s eyes refilled with tears before he hid his face from Mingyu’s view in his pillow.

“I — didn’t notice at all.” Wonwoo cried, yet no tears were coming to Mingyu’s eyes. “I’m sorry for not — realising sooner…!”

Maybe it was because he was listening to Wonwoo’s breaking voice and watching Wonwoo’s crumbled expression, but Mingyu strangely enough didn’t feel as wrecked he thought he would have when the day of Wonwoo finding out about his feelings arrived. His panic had quickly subdued, and now, instead, he felt nothing.

It was as if upon seeing the agony of Wonwoo and hearing the suffering of the realisation of Mingyu’s feelings for him in the other’s voice, Mingyu’s own emotional responses shut down, his body stuffing any and all of his feelings of love and sorrow and pain into a small box and locking it tight before throwing away the key, just leaving him with a strange and hollow feeling of emptiness.

It felt surreal, almost. Like he wasn’t really there and a thin sheet of glass had slipped inbetween him and the world in which Wonwoo existed.

Some distant part of Mingyu wondered if he was supposed to feel bitter, or upset, or even dissatisfied, similar to how one felt when the end of what had started out seeming like a promising and beautiful movie turned out to be greatly unsatisfactory with ties left untied and fates left to the imagination. But Mingyu didn’t feel any of that either.

He felt nothing.

And it was terrifying.

All he could think about was that Minghao had warned him about this scenario just yesterday, but Mingyu had never thought his greatest fear would come true so soon. If he had known, maybe he would’ve treassured the time that he had had with Wonwoo a lot more.

Still, Mingyu couldn’t even feel bad for himself, because in front of him Wonwoo seemed to be suffering a lot more.

“I’m sorry.” Wonwoo kept apologizing between his small whimpers, and Mingyu just ached. How could he feel sorry for himself when Wonwoo was crying like this? “For not understanding. You must’ve — suffered for a long time buh-because o-of me. I—I’m — It must’ve been — _horrible_ for you! I’ve must’ve be—been horrible. I’m sorry. I’m sorry…! I — didn’t know…”

Mingyu was so dissapointed in himself. He’d tried — he’d _really_ tried, for such a long time, to protect Wonwoo from this, but in the end he’d failed. Guilt was eating away at him, like a black hole that had opened up on the floor beneath him and was slowly swallowing him whole. This was because of him. Wonwoo’s tears, Wonwoo’s raw voice, Wonwoo’s red eyes, Wonwoo’s pain, it was all Mingyu’s fault, and Mingyu didn’t think he would ever be able to forgive himself.

Still, bitterness never settled, only a dull sadness and the heavy pity for Wonwoo clawed at his heart as he stared at Wonwoo’s crying form.

“… Why are you the one crying?” Somehow, Mingyu’s voice managed to sound smooth when he refound it, and Wonwoo jerked underneath the sheets at his soft tone. Part of Mingyu wanted to reach out, but the glass was still there, seperating them now. He inhaled slowly, forcing his slow mind to search for the words his heart wanted to say.

“Don’t cry.” He didn’t want to sound accusing, or pleading, and kept his voice steady with great effort. In this moment he needed to be strong for Wonwoo’s sake.

In Mingyu’s mind, it was never about him or his feelings. It was and had always been (and probably would always be) about Wonwoo.

“This is my fault.” He admitted, taking on the blame of the feelings he knew he should’ve never developed in the first place. Mingyu had known it would be dangerous, had known that it was bad, and something that would prove to become a burden to both him and Wonwoo, and yet he had allowed himself to fall. It was entirely his fault that they had turned out like this and above anything he didn’t want Wonwoo to feel as if he had done Mingyu wrong in any way. Because all of it was Mingyu’s doing, and the only one to blame for his mistake was himself.

He took his time inhaling another breath, and then Mingyu prepared to take farewell of the person he loved above anyone else.

“When we first met, I thought that there was no way I would ever become friends with a guy like you.” He started his confession, almost feeling the strange urge to laugh at how blissfully unaware he had been back then about the boy who would come to mean the world to him, and also feeling like crying because even as he had been preparing himself for this all along, Mingyu hadn’t wanted for things to turn out like this. “But you wouldn’t leave me alone. You kept pestering me, kept calling out to me, kept being with me… And before I knew it, I was happy to have you by my side.”

Wonwoo was listening while holding his breath, hanging onto every single one of Mingyu’s words and embracing the needles they drove deeper into his already bleeding heart, because in some part of his head, Wonwoo thought his pain was justified.

Mingyu was in love with him. Mingyu was _in love_ with him, and Wonwoo had had no idea.

The things he’d done with Mingyu — the thing’s he’d talked him into, the intimacy, the kisses, the touches, their secret and heated escepades that Wonwoo had only done on a whim, for fun, for the heck of it, for the excitement — had all been like a poisonous arrow fired into Mingyu’s chest. Without his knowledge, Wonwoo had been the cruel, merciless archer.

For a long time, Mingyu had been hurting, Wonwoo had known that much, but now he also knew that Mingyu had been hurting because of him and it tore Wonwoo apart.

Without intending to, without meaning to, he’d been the absolute worst and shittiest friend Mingyu could’ve had. He’d been the villain in their story without even realising.

Wonwoo was so angry at himself, so heartbroken, so guilty that he didn’t know what to do with himself. Why did he have to be so stupid?

What hurt the most was that it was because of him Mingyu sounded so crestfallen and discouraged now.

“I don’t know when it happened, but at some point I came to like you. But not as a friend.” Even as his voice was soft and tone gentle as he spoke, it was painful for Wonwoo to listen to Mingyu — because he could feel his heartache as if it was his own.

It hurt so bad, he didn’t want to listen. He wanted Mingyu to stop — stop hurting, stop talking.

Stop.

“I should be the one apologising. I didn’t mean to develop these kind of feelings, and I never want to be a burden to you.”

_Stop._

Even through the sheets Wonwoo could hear Mingyu’s wavering inhale, and it was so, so _painful_.

“I was aware, though, from the start, about these emotions.” Mingyu said and another sob wrecked through Wonwoo’s body and he pressed his face firmer against his hands under the duvet.

_Please…_

“… I knew very well that they were one-sided.” Mingyu whispered, and Wonwoo cried even harder because even as Mingyu didn’t shed a single tear, he sounded broken and Wonwoo crumbled into pieces because of it.

_Please don’t speak with that kind of voice._

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

In Mingyu’s case the tears came later, much later.

The screen of his phone felt cool and unplesant as he pressed it tightly against his ear, the rhythmetic ‘ _beep… beep… beep…_ ’ giving his mind something simple to focus on and distract him from the looming emotions of heartbreak that was threatening to sink their claws into him at any moment. They were there, distant, luring in the depths of his mind just beyond his conscious, and Mingyu wanted to do anything to not make sure they wouldn’t catch him.

 _‘Bee—_ ’

" _Hello?"_  Minghao’s voice rang from the other end, dulled by the raidowaves into something soft and strangely pleasant. It felt like calm waves of an ocean under the sun and Mingyu drank in all of it. " _… Hello?_ " The Chinese repeated when the line remained silent.

And Mingyu watned to reply — had planned to — but suddenly, he couldn’t speak. His tongue stuck to the roof of his mouth and his throat felt like sandpaper. His heartbeat picked up inside his chest until his pulse was ringing between his ears and every beat felt like someone hammering nails into his chest. It was so painful, Mingyu could barely breathe.

" _… Mingyu? Is that you?_ " Minghao called through the line, and the monster pounced, the dam that had kept all of Mingyu’s emotions dormant and under control broke, all of them flooding out at once — suddenly and with great impact. Mingyu drew a sharp inhale as everything came over him.

“He knows.” The words rushed out of him, and shortly after, the first tear ran down his face as the fact of his words sunk into his heart. It was quickly followed by countless more until Mingyu no longer could see anything but the long shadows of the houses around him against the asphalt.

There was barely a silence that could be accounted for on the other end before Minghao replied, his voice present with a steadiness that grounded Mingyu to something other than his imploring world.

" _Where are you?"_  He asked, and the simplicity of the question was like cool water for Mingyu’s overheated brain. " _If I gave you my address, do you think you’d be able to get here on your own? Should I come meet you?"_  Immediately Mingyu could hear Minghao move on the other side of the phone, probably getting up from his bed and going to put on his shoes to come meet him, and while the gesture flattered Mingyu he didn’t want the other to bother and quickly tried to blink the tears away from his face (without suceeding.)

“I — No — I could get there — Probably, I think —” He protested while wiping at his cheeks. His tears just _wouldn’t stop_ , but at least his voice didn’t shake as much as he had suspected that it would.

" _Are you sure?"_  Minghao inquired, and when Mingyu didn’t withdraw his statement, he accepted it. " _I’ll send it to you."_  He said and then he was gone from the receiver and Mingyu stood in silence, listening to the tap of the other’s fingers against the screen of his phone. He felt small and out of place in the universe, and he was just hurting, so much — Mingyu hated it. He didn’t want to feel like this, he just wanted it to stop.

Wonwoo had figured it out.

Wonwoo had found out about his feelings.

Wonwoo had rejected him.

 _He_ had fallen for Wonwoo _so hard — Even though_ he had told himself not to.

He had fallen in love with Wonwoo.

And Wonwoo had rejected him.

Everything just hurt, and most of all Mingyu just hated himself, because it was his own fault that he was in such agony.

His chest squeezed the oxygen out of him until Mingyu couldn’t get a single ounce of air into his lungs.

He _hated_ himself.

A shuffle and huff through the phone and suddenly Minghao was back, like a blanket protecting Mingyu from further harm.

" _I sent it. You should receive it soon."_  As if on cue, Mingyu’s phone buzzed against his face, Minghao’s message reaching him just fine. " _Promise me you’ll come, alright?"_  The Chinese sounded stern through the phone, and his insistance made Mingyu dig his teeth into his bottom lip until he could taste blood.

“… Why?” He whispered to Minghao over the phone, guilt seeping into his blood and staining him from the inside. “Why are you being so nice? I —” His voice cracked but he bravely pushed on, wanting answers and wanting to understand because, “… I don’t want to be a burden.” He whispered brokenly, ready to shatter and break on his own.

" _Mingyu."_  Minghao’s voice rang sharply through the speaker and had Mingyu wince at the edge of the other’s tone. He sounded almost angry and spoke with a patient authority mother’s used on their children when they were one strike away from being sent to their room. " _I’m only going to say this once; get your ass over here right now. I’m also gonna tell you something and I want you to listen real closely to me for just a moment and not argue or spout anymore uneccessary or false bullshit, okay?"_ Mingyu didn’t have a response to any of that, and Minghao went ahead without expecting one, speaking so seriously Mingyu got goosebumps along his arms.

" _When things go south, friends are supposed to be there for each other. You can never — and will never — be a burden. Do you hear me?_  "

Minghao’s words were just what Mingyu needed to hear, and a sob finally shook his body, wrecking through him from head to toe. Usually, Mingyu would’ve gotten immensly embarrassed of himself, because Minghao had surely heard it through the phone, but in that moment he didn’t care, and neither did Minghao because he didn’t comment on it.

Suddenly, Mingyu was grateful to the world for Minghao. This classmate — almost stranger — who barely knew him was offering to be his pillar now that Mingyu was finally crumbling. This was what it meant to have friends.

" _If you’re not outside in thirty minutes, I’ll going to come looking for you._ " Minghao said, almost like a threat, and Mingyu wanted to laugh, but it ended up just sounding like a sad stutter.

“Y-yeah, okay…” He managed to agree.

" _I’ll see you soon._ " Were Minghao’s final words before they hung up.

It was a little difficult to type in the address of Minghao’s house into his GPS with his blurry vision and what with the tremble of his fingers, but after a long time of a lot of painful effort, Mingyu managed, and as quickly as his shaking legs would allow after he had taken a moment to calm himself down a little, he set off for Minghao’s place and left his own apartment building in the dust.

He didn’t look back.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

“Hey. Don’t fall asleep on me now.” Seungcheol warily glanced down at the profile of the lulling head of the boy half-leaning, half-pressing against his shoulder in an awkward angle, noting the foggy mist of the boy’s red eyes, the flutter of his eyelashes and his unfocused stare that seemed to be looking far beyond the dim streetlights across the other side of the desolate parking lot they were dwindling on.

“M’not…” The boy mumbled incoherently, shutting his eyes despite his words and turning his head downwards, leaning forwards dangerously so that Seungcheol had to slip and arm around his shoulder’s to keep him from falling off the lid of the dumpster they had claimed for their own and face-planting into the asphalt without as much as even seeming to notice.

Seungcheol clicked his tongue at the other’s state, wondering if maybe he’d given the other a little more than he should’ve this time around, but narrowing it down to the other’s emotional mess of a state in the end. To keep the boy from plummeting to a certain bruise to the face, Seungcheol kept his arm wrapped around the other and pulled him slightly backwards and kept him close and far away from the edge.

“Look, Wonwoo-ya.” Seungcheol sighed and squeezed the other’s shoulder as he looked out over the night. “I know not all hardships are easy to talk about, and maybe you’re not the sharing type, but take this advice from your hyung, okay? Sometimes talking about it makes the burden less heavy to bare.”

Despite his words, his dongsaeng remained quiet, and after half a minute had passed, Seungcheol heaved another sigh and pulled Wonwoo closer to his side. Leaning his head atop Wonwoo’s, the older rubbed soothing circles against the younger’s shoulder.

“Well, at least you’re a cute kid.” Seungcheol hummed wistfully, giving the other his silent support for the following five minutes.

Seungcheol wondered absentmindedly what hour the clock was approaching when a slight chill snuck under his ripped jeans jacket. Maybe he had to keep Wonwoo company until dawn. He wondered if dawn was close, or far. Would they be there for much longer? Not that Seungcheol minded — Wonwoo was a boy with a kind heart, and over the course of getting to know him, Seungcheol had started to regard him as somewhat of a little brother.

Wonwoo was sweet, but gulliable, and very naïve, so in a way, he needed to be taken care of by others. The little stunt Jisoo pulled a few weeks back only proved to Seungcheol that the kid didn’t really have any warning bells, and it only made Seungcheol more determined to act his guardian from the shadows. After all, he didn’t want Wonwoo to see nor experience the things he had in life.

Glancing down at the boy in person, Seungcheol noticed that Wonwoo hadn’t dozed off like he had thought he had, but was rather looking at something that he was cupping in his hands. Angling his neck slightly, Seungcheol tried to catch a glimt of what the small, silver object was.

“What’s that?” He inquired carefully, unsure if his question would receive a reply this time around or if the other would remain silent still. To his surprise Wonwoo raised it for Seungcheol to get a proper look at the small key in his hand and Seungcheol frowned slightly, the fact that the object was a key telling him little to nothing as to why Wonwoo had been staring so intently at it.

“A key?” He baited patiently, considering Wonwoo’s state of mind.

“… I don’t know how to return it.” Wonwoo’s voice was so small, Seungcheol barely caught the words he spoke. The sentiment in his dongsaeng’s voice had Seungcheol’s facial features soften slightly and he tore his eyes from Wonwoo’s wounded expression to look at the key again, understanding that it had value in Wonwoo’s heart but was also connected to the reason for Wonwoo’s pain.

“You know, if you don’t want it anymore, and it’s difficult to give it back… You know, just…” He made a lazy throwing motion with his arm so that Wonwoo would understand what he meant, but Wonwoo shook his head, his bangs shifting across his forehead.

“I can’t do that…” His voice sounded brittle, like he was close to bursting into tears (again) and Seungcheol withheld a sigh, pity tugging at his heart at the sight of the heartbroken boy beside him.

“If it’s so important that you return it, why not just get it over with?” He asked and watched as Wonwoo closed his eyes and drew a shaky breath.

“I… I can’t face him anymore. Mi—Mingyu surely — He surely hates me, and I can’t — I can’t…” He slurred, shaking his head and sounding so sombre and miserable that Seungcheol’s heart ached for him.

“… You’re sure you can’t keep it?” Seungcheol didn’t know the context to Wonwoo’s misery, so he couldn’t understand what he was going through, but he knew Mingyu was someone Wonwoo valued immensly, because whenever Wonwoo had told Seungcheol stories about the other boy, he would do so with a light in his eyes Seungcheol envied.

Something bad had happened, and Mingyu and Wonwoo had fallen out. Seungcheol had understood as much after the first thirty minutes of drinking with Wonwoo when the other had suddenly burst into tears.

Wonwoo looked so saddened about the idea of returning the key to Mingyu, so part of Seungcheol wanted Wonwoo to keep it, but to his sadness, Wonwoo rejected the idea. In a way, it seemed that Wonwoo had already decided that the failure of his and Mingyu’s relationship was already set in stone.

“… Is there anyone you can give it to? Someone else that could hand it back to him for you?” Seungcheol asked kindly. “If you don’t think you can handle confrontation… That’s probably the best way to go about it.” Seungcheol offered his opinion on the matter, trying to help Wonwoo find a solution that was as painless for the other as possible.

His words had Wonwoo think for a while before he pocketed the key and leant his head against Seuncheol’s shoulder and closed his eyes. Seungcheol thought his sigh sounded awefully sad.

“Yeah, maybe…”

They ended up staying out until dawn shyly greeted them, but Seungcheol could tell that despite everything he had tried, Wonwoo remained disheartened.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

**Uri Jihonnie~**

 

<( Wonwoo, would you please answer one of us? )  
RECEIVED, WEDNESDAY 13.42

<( We’re worried about you. )  
RECEIVED THURSDAY 19.50

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

**KwonSoonYoung-ah**

 

<( You know I don’t mean the things I say when I tease you, right? )  
RECEIVED THURSDAY 17.02

<( I’m sorry if I’ve made you mad. )  
RECEIVED THURSDAY 17.07

<( Get back to me when you feel like it. )  
RECEIVED THURSDAY 17.19

<( I love you. )  
RECEIVED FRIDAY 00.02

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

✦☆ ♡ **Junhun** ♡ ☆✦

 

<( Are you okay? )  
RECEIVED MONDAY 11.32

<( Did something happen with Mingyu? )  
RECEIVED MONDAY 11.55

<( Call me? It’s expensive, yes, but you know it doesn't matter if it’s you. )  
RECEIVED WEDNESDAY 08.33

<( Are you with S.coups-hyung? )  
RECEIVED FRIDAY 23.19

<( Be safe, wherever you are. I’m coming home the day after tomorrow. )  
RECEIVED FRIDAY 23.23

<( I’ll come to yours straight from the airport. Ask your mom to make an extra portion for dinner~ )  
RECEIVED SATURDAY 15.05

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

**Mingyu~!!** ** ♡ **

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

Summerbreak was nearing its end. In just about a week, school would be back in motion and Mingyu would be attending his third year. Wonwoo would be attending his last. Time sure moved along quickly and spared no mind to those who were stuck in their own miserable circumstances.

Mingyu thought time was a bitch.

Thinking about Wonwoo still made Mingyu’s heart ache terribly, but even so he couldn’t help himself and in every unoccupied moment his mind drifted to the boy in question and lingered there.

He guessed, in a way, that he was mourning; mourning the loss of a friend, mourning that he had hurt Wonwoo, mourning the fact that they didn’t get a happy ending even though he’d known they wouldn’t all along. He’d known, yet Mingyu had hoped. He had hoped oh so desperatedly and pathetically that things would turn out fine in the end, and now that they hadn’t, he felt bitter and down and the ache in his chest was more painful than anything he’d ever felt before.

He felt stupid.

Stupid, stupid, _stupid._

Stupid and sad Mingyu — that was him.

Maybe he deserved it. In his own mind, Mingyu continously justified the guilt swarming his soul by reminding himself that he had been the one to screw up. He was the one who fell for Wonwoo. He was the one who messed their friendship up. He was the one who ruined everything, and he would never forgive himself for that.

“Stop that.”

Mingyu was pulled from his inner turmoil when a book collided with the back of his head and lifting his hands to cover the spot where a bump was sure to appear shortly he looked over his shoulder at his friend and gave him a soft frown.

“Ow.” He said in lack of anything else, but Minghao ignored him and went to pick up the thrown book from the floor without care for Mingyu’s pain. Either of them, apparently, as he nailed the other lazing around on the floor in front of his TV with a hard look once he straightened up again.

“That’s what you get. We’ve talked about this. Just stop thinking about him.” He reprimanded and Mingyu shrunk away under his sharp eyes, turning his head to pretend and watch the comercial with girls in bikinis that happened to be running on the channel.

“How did you even know…” He mumbles under his breath, but Minghao had superhearing and huffed in response.

“It’s paifully obvious. You get this heartbroken look on your face and your eyes grow glassy. You’re like a fucking book, geez. Get a grip.” He grumbled and went back to his bed where he flopped down and remained reading.

They had already went through all the stages of Mingyu’s grieving, from Minghao just holding him and letting him cry without asking questions, to Minghao letting Mingyu have his bed while he slept on the couch so as the other wouldn’t have to go back to his apartment, to Mingyu telling Minghao everything from start to finish over an entire night while the sun was replaced by the moon and the stars and then found it’s way back to peek in at them through the window again. Minghao had listened to him, held his hand when he needed, and supported him through all of it, and of course they grew close to one another.

Mingyu knew Minghao pretty well by now, how he was a gentle person with a strong head who was kind but wouldn’t shy away from arguing with you if he didn’t agree with the things you said. He also learnt that Minghao could be brash, but was caring underneath, and for some time now Mingyu had been on the receiving end of what his friend called ‘though love’.

His words could be harsh, but he was only looking out for Mingyu by forcing him to toughen up a bit. God knows he needed to if he was going to get over Wonwoo. If that was ever going to be possible.

“I should go home.” Mingyu announced what had been on his mind and Minghao glanced to him briefly, raising an eyebrow at his statement.

“You should.” He responded flippantly and didn’t look at Mingyu again until the other had heaved a sigh, turned off the TV and stood up from the floor. “You’re actually going?” He asked, as if he hadn’t believed Mingyu had meant it and the taller nodded his head slowly.

“Yeah. I should probably… clean before school starts again.” He scrunched his nose up at the thought of the thin layer of dust that had been over the room the last time he had stopped by to grab more clothes to bring to Minghao’s place and while the prospect of going back and actually doing something about it wasn’t very appealing in Mingyu’s mind, it was about time. He had almost avoided it like the plague, at first fearful that Wonwoo would come looking for him, but after almost three weeks of no shape of contact, neither from his side or from Wonwoo’s, he deemed it safe enough to go back.

He didn’t want to admit that it stung that Wonwoo hadn’t even tried to reach out to him, not a single sound. He could deny it all he wanted, it still felt as if his heart had been ripped out of his chest.

Minghao put his book down and sat up on his bed, throwing his legs over the edge and looking to Mingyu.

“Do you want me to follow you?” He asked and Mingyu considered it for a while before he shook his head.

“No, I’ll be fine.” He assured and Minghao gave him a tilt of his head.

“Alright.” He shurgged and made to lie back down. “Call me tonight after you’ve finished cleaning everything?”

The question made Mingyu smile bleakly and give the other a small nod with his head, feeling the now familiar feeling of gratitude for the Chinese male’s existance.

“Right.”

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

Mingyu threw his window open and cleaned everything; wiped every surface, vaccuumed every spot of the floor, washed every single item of tableware and emptied and sanatized his fridge and threw out the trash.

He was as good as done, but when he came to the bed, however, he hesitated.

The sheets were still crumbled from when Wonwoo had been on it, the duvet strewn haphazardly over the mattress, probably from when he had thrown it off when he left —Mingyu wouldn’t know since he had no longer been there at that time — and now Mingyu’s eyes rested on the sight of it.

He looked at the sheets, the dip in the mattress after Wonwoo’s body, his dented pillow, and he felt all of it tear open his heart anew, re-opening the wounds that hadn’t had enough time to properly close to begin with.

This was where Wonwoo had cried.

This was where Mingyu had ruined everything.

It hurt.

Reaching out, Mingyu ran a hand over his bundled up blanket, smoothening it out and remembering how Wonwoo’s body had trembled beneath it from the force of his sobs from that time. Thinking about it, Mingyu just ached.

Carefully, with trembling fingers, he brought the blanket to his nose and inhaled softly. Imediately a blade dug into his heart and a sharp jab of pain ran through his body, but even so Mingyu drew in air through his nose again because it smelled of Wonwoo. The familiar and enticing scent of his friend came over him and slithered it’s way into every crevice of Mingyu’s being until his enire body felt like it was soaring in the skies. Heat crawled under his skin until it was coiling deep in his abdomen and making a spark travel up his spine.

Something like a pitiful whimper — a keen, almost — wavered past Mingyu’s lips as he burried his face in the material of his duvet, and he felt utterly pathetic and disapointed that even after everything his resolve wasn’t stonger than that.

He missed Wonwoo.

He missed him, he missed him, he missed him, so bad he didn’t know what to do with himself.

For now he climbed into the bed and pressed his blanket to him and allowed Wonwoo’s scent to fill him up and make his heart ache and his head spin. Within him his agony was battling with the overwhelming affection for Wonwoo that had swiftly rekindled as soon as Mingyu had allowed himself to think of the other boy, and soon he couldn’t think about anything but Wonwoo. Wonwoo’s smile, Wonwoo’s laughter, Wonwoo’s tears, his snores, his lips, Wonwoo’s hands, his warmth, his voice, his moans, Wonwoo’s body — Mingyu missed it; everything, all of it, every single inch of Wonwoo’s being.

He missed him.

He missed being with him, missed touching Wonwoo. He missed Wonwoo touching _him_ , and even as heartbroken as he was feeling, lying there in his bed that still smelled of Wonwoo with all of these thoughts and memories in his head, Mingyu could feel the familiar flames or arousal lick at him and he stood no chance against them. Just like that, he lost the battle of his hearts desire and it quickly overwhelmed him and took charge of his actions.

Sticking his nose into his blanket, Mingyu groaned when he could feel his pants tighten over his hardening dick, and he almost wanted to cry, almost laugh, because he was just so pathetic, but neither a sob nor laughter broke past his lips, just a quiet whimper.

He hadn’t touched himself lately — how could he have? — and with everything between him and Wonwoo weighing down on him, a lot of pressure had built up within his body. Apart from sad, heartbroken and ashamed, he was frustrated and he needed some sort of distraction to release everything he was holding back.

It almost startled Mingyu how sensitive he was and how quickly his body responded to the touch when he grazed his hand over his clothed erection, a shock of pleasure rocking through him that made him groan deeply in his throat and weakly push his hip forwards. He palmed himself through his jeans and chewed down on his bottomlip, feeling himself tremble like a leaf on a stormy day on top of the bed.

Desire and arousal clouded his mind and with Wonwoo’s scent filling his nose Mingyu’s heart started pumping and his blood started rushing, and soon enough his pulse was thundering in his ears and the heat of his body had elevated until the air of the room was too hot for him and he struggled to breathe.

Undoing his pants his fingers quickly dipped under the hemline of his underwear and wrapped around his throbbing cock. With shaky fingers he gave it a stroke and immediately felt how all of the tension washed away from his muscles and how pleasure quickly climbed up his body and replaced it.

Wrapping his hand more firmly around his length, Mingyu started pumping it.

The image of Wonwoo haunted him and with his eyes squeezed firmly shut, Wonwoo was all Mingyu could see and think of.

With the accompanying scent of his friend, it almost felt like a phanthom of the other was there with Mingyu and as his mind recalled the touch of Wonwoo’s hands, his body could recall it as if it was really happening right then.

He remembered the feeling of Wonwoo’s elegant fingers when they would tease the skin of his abdomen on their way down to his waistline, how they would sometimes stop and dance in circles over his hipbones when Wonwoo tested his patience, and he remembered the breathy, dark chuckles of Wonwoo when he would find Mingyu’s frustrated glares amusing before he would comply to pleasure him and move his hand lower.

He could recall the salty taste of the sweaty skin of Wonwoo’s warm neck when they would press their bodies flush together and rutt against each other in the dim light of the unused art-room, how Wonwoo’s erect dick felt like when it wetly slid against his, the sound of the other male’s deep grunts and groans in his ear, and the way Wonwoo’s hands would dig into his back and crinkle his uniform.

He recalled Wonwoo’s mouth, his expression when he would bite down on his bottom lip and his eyes would darken with lust, the slick sheen and the slightly reddening of his lips when they would part after a particularly heavy and heated make-out session, the nice feeling of his lips against Mingyu’s, and also the painstakingly arousing sight and feeling of them wrapped around his dick, the inside of Wonwoo’s mouth hot and moist and absolutely perfect the times he had taken Mingyu all the way in.

Heat was quickly coiling deep within Mingyu’s gut and his cock twitched in his hand, leaking pre-cum all over his fingers and making their rhythmatic movement up and down his shaft that much easier.

He could see the images from the many times he’d had Wonwoo underneath him on this bed, twisting in pleasure and trembling with desire, reaching out to him and holding onto him and stuttering his name in-between moans. They all melted together until it was all just a blurr of the expanse of Wonwoo’s pale neck when he would throw his head back, the sweet crease between his eyebrows when his face would twist in a pleasurably pained grimace, the hot gust of his breath when it would wash against Mingyu’s face, the curve of his back when his lithe body would arch off the bed, and the heat of his body against Mingyu’s.

He remembered the time when they had gone further than just their hands or mouths on each other’s bodies and suddenly he can see Wonwoo’s flushed face hidden behind his forearm and feel the searing heat of Wonwoo’s insides, the tightness of his body when he had pushed his finger into him and the sight of the flush that had covered all of Wonwoo’s body when he had.

Wonwoo’s moans at that time, and all of the times when he had come while choking on Mingyu’s name was what had Mingyu tip over the edge. He gasped and his dick throbbed, his balls tightening before releasing and shooting an even and thick stream of white come into his hands and over the sheet he was still clutching to his body, and Mingyu groaned deeply as he jerked his hips and milked every last drop out of his orgasm. Afterwards, he let go of his spent cock and relaxed into the mattress, staring up at his ceiling with hazy vision and his heavy breathing giving sound to the silence of his room.

When he had finally begun to come down from the height of his euphoria, Mingyu began feeling the familiar prickling and burning sensation of oncoming tears behind his eyes.

He was still in love with Wonwoo, and after everything, Mingyu honestly wondered if there would ever come a time when he wasn’t.

Bringing his unsoiled hand up he covered his face with his forearm and cried silently, lying on his own in his apartment and feeling absolutely worthless.

 

✧ ✧ ✧

 

“Why don’t you just watch both?” Mingyu inquired only to receive a tired sigh through his phone, which he kept pressed to his ear with one hand while holding onto the bag of fresh groceries he had purchased in his other.

“ _I can’t watch_ both _, Mingyu, and you know why. Since school is starting in a few days I don’t want to turn the day around and die when I have to force myself to start getting up at 7 A.M. again._ ” Minghao explained snarkily, having called Mingyu to help him decide on what movie he should watch before he called it a night. Honestly Mingyu couldn’t care less, but talking to Minghao was nice and soothing, and while he still sometimes felt awkward with the other boy, he really liked him. Having a friend was nice, he’d come to realise.

“Throw a coin?” He suggested.

“ _I would if I had one. I asked for your opinion because you got good taste in movies.”_

Mingyu’s heart fluttered as he started to ascend the stairs of his apartment complex, giving Minghao’s two options another thought in his head.

“… Then the first one.” He concluded, and he heard Minghao hum softly on the other side.

“ _The first one it is. Give me a sec, I’m just going to put the DVD in._ ”

Mingyu snorted and wanted to ask who still watched actual DVDs in this day and age when you could find anything online, but then he reached his floor and his eyes landed on the person hovering outside his door.

Mingyu stopped in his tracks and every muscle in his body went slack as he looked at the profile of Jeon Wonwoo. His emotions went heywire, but he couldn’t pick out what exactly it was that he was feeling when Wonwoo appeared to notice his eyes on him and slowly turned his head, their eyes locking onto one another and remaining there for what felt like an eternity.

Mingyu couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t speak, couldn’t act, and couldn’t think. He was frozen to the spot, staring at Wonwoo’s face and being completely blown away by how he still found the other overwhelmingly beautiful, even now.

He couldn’t read Wonwoo’s emotions through his gaze at all, and Mingyu was conflicted, uncertain of what he was supposed to do in this scenario and afraid of what would come out of their meeting.

Why was Wonwoo there? Why, why, why, _why?_ What did he want? Did he come to finally wish Mingyu a happy life without him? Did he come to taunt him? Had he been unable to live without Mingyu and had missed him too?

All these thoughts were blown away the moment Wonwoo parted his lips and his deep voice rang through the stiff air between them.

“Hey.” He greeted softly, and upon hearing his voice, Mingyu just melted.

“ _There, I’m back._ ” Minghao announced beside Mingyu’s ear, but Mingyu wasn’t hearing him — at all. All he could hear and see now was Wonwoo. “ _Would you say this movie has a good ending or a bad one? I don’t deal well with bad endings, to be honest, so please tell me in advance if it’s—”_

Wonwoo’s eyes drifted to Mingyu’s phone beside his face before they slowly returned to his.

“… Are you on the phone with someone?” He asked, and for some reason Mingyu himself didn’t understand he instantly lowered his hands with the phone and denied it.

“No. No, I…”

“ _… Mingyu? Are you talking to someone else?_ ” Minghao’s voice still reached his ears and Mingyu’s heart was beating furiously inside his chest. Why was Wonwoo there, outside his door? What did he want? “ _Is someone there?_ ” Minghao’s questions went unanswered and Mingyu stared Wonwoo down.

“Oh. Alright.” The other said and shifted his weight between his feet, looking a little uncertain but still absolutely desirable in the soft light of the late sunset painting the sky. “So you’re not busy?”

“No.” Mingyu heard himself say and he could for the life of him not understand himself. There they stood, two people who just hurt each other by being together, and acted like normal. As if nothing at all was wrong or had happened between them at all, talking civally with each other without tears and without cusses. Frankly, it made Mingyu’s chest squeeze his heart tightly and he was starting to feel a little sick.

“ _… Is that Wonwoo?_ “ Mingyu wanted Minghao to shut up. Shut up, shut up _, shut up_. He already knew what he would say, but Mingyu didn’t care for anyone but the boy in front of his door at the moment.

“Can I come in then?” Wonwoo asked easily, innocently, sweetly, dangerously, and Mingyu’s muscles stiffened at the familiar phrase that he had heard so, so, so many times before.

“ _Are you talking to Wonwoo? Is he at your apartment? Mingyu, whatever you do, don’t —_ ” Minghao’s voice sounded like a warning, a haste to his words that Mingyu had known would be there, and actually, he should’ve listened to him, but Mingyu didn’t. Instead he pressed his thumb to the ‘end call’ button and cut Minghao off before he could say anything more.

Fighting the burning sensation climbing it’s way up his throat, Mingyu swallowed and met Wonwoo’s gaze head on, trying to look indifferent even though his pulse was almost unbearingly loud in his ears.

“… Yeah, sure.”

 

✧ ✧ ✧

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N:
> 
> Wonwoo, why are you there...?
> 
> Also, SHE'S ALIVE!!!!
> 
> I know. Shocking.
> 
> Heya everyone~ A lot of people subscribed to this story after the last chapter, and I'm honestly a little shook... Hello... Nice to meet you all... /////;;;
> 
> I continued to get comments asking me why I was taking so long and when the new chapter would be up, and honestly, for a while it kind of dampened my spirits a little. I'm really busy studying Japanese, and I don't want you guys to think that I'm neglecting writing because of it, but you have to understand that it's not easy to move all across the globe and start a completely new language (that is also incredibly hard), keep up with homework, settle into your new environment, make friends and still make time to write inbetween morning and evening study sessions, school, eating proper meals and cleaning your room. I don't want to sound like I'm whining, but I am very busy — I still love this story though and I still stay up really late some nights (even though for the sake of my education I shouldn't) to write on it, but I still need you to understand what I'm dealing with. I really am sorry this took so long~
> 
> On a less glum note (sorry for that!!) a lot of you have also commented really nice things that made me happilly sacrifice some of my sleep to get this out as soon as I possibly could!! (So don't think I'm referring to all of you when I talk in the paragraph above!) Honestly, I'm really happy a lot of people seem to be enjoying this story, and I feel really motivated to keep it going for as long as possible! To those of you who've commented really nice things and showed appriciation for this story, thank you! Reading your comments have made my days, each and every single time — it never fails to make me happy.
> 
> Now, actually regarding THE CHAPTER, Seungcheol appeared! How did that happen? Also, Minghao is precious. (And Mingyu masturbated... why do I write stuff like this... *crawls and hides in a corner*) 
> 
> Do you want Meanie to be happy in this story? Do you want them to be together? Or no? I haven't actually decided myself yet what it is that I want, so I'd love to hear your opinions~
> 
> Also, I'm curious, why do you think Wonwoo is outside Mingyu's door? ㅋㅋㅋ...
> 
> Until next time~


End file.
